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How do I know what this is?

  • 07-07-2010 10:40am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I've been going out with my current bf for 5months, We're both 21 and hes my first serious bf also. He is so nice, we get on really well, have great time together, enjoy each others company, laugh a lot and have fun together. He's really sweet, says the nicest things to me and I know is there for me if there is something upsetting me and vice-versa.

    So my question is how do you know is the one you're with is truely someone that you want to be passionate with and share everything with or is just a friend?

    Sorry for posing such q's, but I'm just confused. I feel strongly for my bf but I just wonder are these real feelings I have for him or is it just that I've found someone that is a great friend with common interests that I can have good fun with and enjoy their company, a friend moreso than anything else??


Comments

  • #2
    Beruthiel
    Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 42,362 Mod ✭✭✭✭Beruthiel


    howdoyouknow wrote: »
    Sorry for posing such q's, but I'm just confused. I feel strongly for my bf but I just wonder are these real feelings I have for him or is it just that I've found someone that is a great friend with common interests that I can have good fun with and enjoy their company, a friend moreso than anything else??

    Are you physically attracted to him and want to jump his bones on a regular basis?
    If you are then there's your answer.


  • #3
    Contessa Raven
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 642 ✭✭✭Contessa Raven


    Hi OP,

    If you feel strongly for your boyfriend and you have a sexual relationship well then it's not just friendship. Friends don't (usually!) have sex with each other. Most people will think of their OH's as their best friends so the friendship feelings should be there but with the added feelings of being in love and sexual attraction.

    My boyfriend is my best friend but he's also the first person I think of when I wake up and the last person I think of when I go to sleep. We have a very strong bond that goes beyond friendship and we are also sexually attracted to each other and act on that regularly.

    I wouldn't feel this way about any of my friends and that's what separates it from regular friendship.

    CR


  • #4
    carmel27
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 170 ✭✭carmel27


    howdoyouknow wrote: »
    Sorry for posing such q's, but I'm just confused. I feel strongly for my bf but I just wonder are these real feelings I have for him or is it just that I've found someone that is a great friend with common interests that I can have good fun with and enjoy their company, a friend moreso than anything else??

    The only thing that will answer those questions is time! The longer you spend together, the sooner you'll have your answer.


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