is it possible?

LegacyUser

Hi all,

I will be quick...

Had a bf for few months and we broke up 2 years ago and yet I do still think of him everyday..Now, when we first started dating I just had a death in my family, and he coincidently also had some serious drama in his family as well.

I was wondering, I always hear that people that get together when such dramatic event happens you ten to subconsciently "tight" them to that even, mentally or whatever because for the life of me I can not forget this guy. I felt madly in love with him and I believe he was, probably always will be the love of my life, we had a very hard time cutting contact, proudly done it now for 7 months, deserve a medal at this point but still he is always in my mind.
I go out on the pissed, I'm social and met few guys and yet, he is still every single day in my head. I don't know really how I feel about him anymore, love yes for sure but it feels strange. Last we spoke, 7 months ago he was in the same boat than me...don't know now. Maybe he has someone (we told each other we had to cut complete contact) but my point is, is it more difficult to get over someone when it happened at the time when an emotional event happens??

Would love to hear from people who might have gone through something similar or any comment really.

Thank you

LegacyUser

I understand your view on the 'tight'ening due to certain circumstances. Im sure this varies from person to person, situation pending. You obviously had a difficult time back then & you may have seen / still see him as a pillar, somone who could pick you up when you were in dire times. Maybe you associate him with your loss & it comforts you that he was there for you

Personally, my experience is similar. I still think of someone who was dear to my heart but now I look out for me & avoid the person, its what i deem most appropriate (for me)
If you were to contact him, what do you wish to gain? The option of contacting him for a chat is obvoulsy there. Start with a coversation possibly & let it progress from there. If you have not seen him in so long, you may feel different when you do commence contact again.

Stop womdering & take soem action, at least you will find out if there is something still their

pilph

I've been in a situation where a previous partner & I had deaths on both sides of our families and we were a rock for each other. I mean brilliant, she knew exactly what to say or do and I just listened to her when it was on her side. Sometimes just being there in the dead of night to allow a person to hug you means the world. But ultimately it didn't work out, which was tough, but such is life.

I understand the whole love of your life thing, but are you attracted to anyone else at all?