Desperate? Single Women Over 30?

starbelgrade

My missus brought this issue to my attention - she has a lot of single female friends & colleagues, who around the age of 30, seem to get slightly desperate when they can't seem to pin a guy down into a long term relationship.

A lot of them feel like they should be married, many feel like they should be both married & having kids. Maybe it's a body clock thing, maybe it's the thought of being "left on the shelf", but there seems to be a certain desperation about it that I don't see in any of my male friends or colleagues who are single.

Anyone else got any experience of this? Like I said, it's not something I know a great deal about.

I Was VB

Let them eat cake, apparently its better than sex at that age.

L.Jenkins

I've met alot of women who were 30+ Desperate maybe, horny as hell, Defo. If they want to pin me down I have no problems with that, pm me a few emails.

segaBOY

Their desperation drives guys away if anything.

Gunsfortoys

Pics or GTFO

epgc3fyqirnbsx

Talked to a fella who said he did ok in his 20's with girls (he was always happy being single and is a nice fella) but when he went into his thirties he was fighting them off.
Said its not as cool as it sounds, every time he went out someone was trying to hook him up with so and so and when he did go with a girl for a night, which was all he wanted and was clear about, he end up getting a LOT more than he bargained for.

He actually said that while he wants to be single, he'd nearly get a girlfriend jsut because being a single bachelor was kind of stressfull and seriously affecting a good night out

starbelgrade

Gunsfortoys wrote: »

Pics or GTFO

http://www.cartoonstock.com/lowres/epa0928l.jpg

Millicent

There is a social standard that says that all women should be married and that's probably what is prompting these women to act desperate. The pressure to not be left on the shelf is intense.

I never ever want to get married and the amount of times I've gotten the third degree on this is shocking. Still, despite knowing my views, I occasionally have friends and family ask when my boyfriend is going to give me a ring or do the decent thing. And I'm 26. People have no problems in asking which is probably why women at 30 start to get anxious. Same goes for babies. It's nuts how people deem it appropriate to question you on your reproductive inclinations.

segaBOY

August Zealous Hurricane wrote: »

Talked to a fella who said he did ok in his 20's with girls (he was always happy being single and is a nice fella) but when he went into his thirties he was fighting them off.
Said its not as cool as it sounds, every time he went out someone was trying to hook him up with so and so and when he did go with a girl for a night, which was all he wanted and was clear about, he end up getting a LOT more than he bargained for.

He actually said that while he wants to be single, he'd nearly get a girlfriend jsut because being a single bachelor was kind of stressfull and seriously affecting a good night out

Have heard similar stories. I find some girls in their late 20s can be the same.
I know a few who come out with comments like:

"had a dream last night, I went to a club, met and fell absoutely in love with a guy and married the next day"

riiiiiighhht

and

"God, arranged marriages might be the way to go at this stage"

ok there.

Rented Mule

segaBOY wrote: »

Their desperation drives guys away if anything.

Actually it the smell of desperation that scares men away the most.

L.Jenkins

Im single again for the last few weeks again and 25. In all honesty, at this moment in life, being attached is a bigger pain in the hole, but there's something I love about a woman in her 30s. I'd gladly take on a woman in her 30s, theres alot of advantages to it :P

Millicent

I Was VB wrote: »

Let them eat cake, apparently its better than sex at that age.

Actually, that's more true for men- women start to hit their sexual peaks from their 30's and have the best sex in their forties apparently. For lads it's something like 18! :P

Want some cake?

alwaysadub

:eek:
That's so freakey-i'm literally just after watching my sisters wedding video from 10years ago and one of my uncles made some smart comment to me, on video, bout how i should get the finger out and settle down.

10years later,i'm still no closer. :pac:

I'm 30 and single, but i'm not just going to grab the 1st bloke who i like(or who likes me) and beg him to marry me before i'm too old. A lot of the girls in my family have married and had families well into their 30's and they're all doing alright.

When,and if, the right man comes along, i just want things to progress at their own pace and not be rushing into either kids or marriage so i can breath a sigh of relief that i'm married at a 'respectable' age

L.Jenkins

Rented Mule wrote: »

Actually it the smell of desperation that scares men away the most.

I would have thought that there desperation would have made them easier to pull. Some women of that age can be hard enough to pull given the fact that they might have far higher standards than someone of there 20s

Gunsfortoys

alwaysadub wrote: »

:eek:
That's so freakey-i'm literally just after watching my sisters wedding video from 10years ago and one of my uncles made some smart comment to me, on video, bout how i should get the finger out and settle down.

10years later,i'm still no closer. :pac:

I'm 30 and single, but i'm not just going to grab the 1st bloke who i like(or who likes me) and beg him to marry me before i'm too old. A lot of the girls in my family have married and had families well into their 30's and they're all doing alright.

When,and if, the right man comes along, i just want things to progress at their own pace and not be rushing into either kids or marriage so i can breath a sigh of relief that i'm married at a 'respectable' age

I smell desperation...

GLaDOS

Stupid non desperate 20 year old women....

Tail Wagger

Well in my line of work I have the privilege of visiting peoples homes all the time. I can assure you also that there are lots of them in the 30s + and very yummy indeed, but I have yet to see any desperate in that sense... a lot more nays, than yeas Id'e imagine...

starbelgrade

alwaysadub wrote: »

:eek:
That's so freakey-i'm literally just after watching my sisters wedding video from 10years ago and one of my uncles made some smart comment to me, on video, bout how i should get the finger out

In fairness, there's a time & a place for everything.

L.Jenkins

alwaysadub wrote: »

:eek:
That's so freakey-i'm literally just after watching my sisters wedding video from 10years ago and one of my uncles made some smart comment to me, on video, bout how i should get the finger out and settle down.

10years later,i'm still no closer. :pac:

I'm 30 and single, but i'm not just going to grab the 1st bloke who i like(or who likes me) and beg him to marry me before i'm too old. A lot of the girls in my family have married and had families well into their 30's and they're all doing alright.

When,and if, the right man comes along, i just want things to progress at their own pace and not be rushing into either kids or marriage so i can breath a sigh of relief that i'm married at a 'respectable' age

Trust me, you'll live long enough and your still young even at 30 so have a shít load more craic before you do get hitched. I know a woman of 40 odd with a child and she regrets getting married ever so slightly but thats her.

Einhard

I Was VB wrote: »

Let them eat cake, apparently its better than sex at that age.

Hmmm, I think that may be why some of them don't have boyfriends in the first place!

:pac:

southsiderosie

Millicent wrote: »

Actually, that's more true for men- women start to hit their sexual peaks from their 30's and have the best sex in their forties apparently. For lads it's something like 18! :P

Want some cake?

When I was in my 20s the ladies I used to work with told me this - they all said their hormones went into overdrive when they hit 30, but they guys were all slowing down. I still remember a woman in her late 30s talking about a date with someone in his early 40s and sneering, "and he actually wanted to cuddle".

I was amused...and then I hit 30. They were right. Yowza.

That said, I'm not really feeling the pressure to be a wife and/or breeder at this point.

alwaysadub

starbelgrade wrote: »

In fairness, there's a time & a place for everything.

Damn,i knew i should've worded that differently :pac:

alwaysadub

Gunsfortoys wrote: »

I smell desperation...

Bahaha, i've been called many things lately, desperate to settle down is definitely not one of them,believe me.

L.Jenkins

southsiderosie wrote: »

I was amused...and then I hit 30. They were right. Yowza.

That said, I'm not really feeling the pressure to be a wife and/or breeder at this point.

Your body does that to encourage you to have kids before you lose the ability in around your 50s/60s.

epgc3fyqirnbsx

southsiderosie wrote: »

When I was in my 20s the ladies I used to work with told me this - they all said their hormones went into overdrive when they hit 30, but they guys were all slowing down. I still remember a woman in her late 30s talking about a date with someone in his early 40s and sneering, "and he actually wanted to cuddle".

I was amused...and then I hit 30. They were right. Yowza.

That said, I'm not really feeling the pressure to be a wife and/or breeder at this point.

yeah yeah yeah, but you said your hormones were in overdrive right?
How does this make you feel? What do you tink about?
I want to know purely for the purposes of this thread

Gunsfortoys

alwaysadub wrote: »

Bahaha, i've been called many things lately, desperate to settle down is definitely not one of them,believe me.

I was jokin....but hey it is the internet.

segaBOY

alwaysadub wrote: »

Bahaha, i've been called many things lately, desperate to settle down is definitely not one of them,believe me.

C'mere I see you travel from Galway to Dublin a lot, if you ever want to settle down and start a nice family somewhere in the midlands just give me a PM.

*I forgot how good it feels to be a creep

southsiderosie

djhunter30 wrote: »

Your body does that to encourage you to have kids before you lose the ability in around your 50s/60s.

From what I've been told, there is a steep decline in fertility at 35. So, yeah, this is my body warning me to hurry up. Unfortunately there is no room in my life for anything that can't clean up its own poo, so that means no dogs or babies.

rossie1977

horny desperate single women in their 30s you say :eek:

every girl i know is married by 30

southsiderosie

August Zealous Hurricane wrote: »

yeah yeah yeah, but you said your hormones were in overdrive right?
How does this make you feel? What do you tink about?
I want to know purely for the purposes of this thread

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L.Jenkins

southsiderosie wrote: »

From what I've been told, there is a steep decline in fertility at 35. So, yeah, this is my body warning me to hurry up. Unfortunately there is no room in my life for anything that can't clean up its own poo, so that means no dogs or babies.

I wouldnt worry too much about that. With improving health women are capable of having kids much older so no rush! Im 25, so Im definately in no rush what so ever.

Darlughda

What the hell is this - the Bridget Jones stereotypes thread?

Judging by how much nauseating braindead chick-lit is read by certain women who also think sex and the city is great, sure there are those stereotypes hanging around irl.
But they were probably like that when they were 18. They are usually wanting to hook up with some boring guy who played safe all his life, has a safe boring job and now wants a safe boring marriage with 2.5 kids and a mortgage on the semi-d.

However, most women I know have matured into successful, independent and confident women in their 30's, who know what they want and what they don't want.

They have made their own choices not to have children or to have them, many are financially solvent and active sexually. Some have chosen to develop second careers and interests and they have no interest in squandering their savings waltzing up a church aisle in some meringue for the sake of family and society expectations.
They are not interested in the approval of others and they are assertive enough to say no to such expectations.

alwaysadub

segaBOY wrote: »

C'mere I see you travel from Galway to Dublin a lot, if you ever want to settle down and start a nice family somewhere in the midlands just give me a PM.

*I forgot how good it feels to be a creep

PM sent.

Now start writing your wedding speech, and i'll go looking for a pram :pac:

Gunsfortoys

southsiderosie wrote: »

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Men in their twenties are the same, tis a pity really.

segaBOY

Darlughda wrote: »

What the hell is this - the Bridget Jones stereotypes thread?

Judging by how much nauseating braindead chick-lit is read by certain women who also think sex and the city is great, sure there are those stereotypes hanging around irl.
But they were probably like that when they were 18. They are usually wanting to hook up with some boring guy who played safe all his life, has a safe boring job and now wants a safe boring marriage with 2.5 kids and a mortgage on the semi-d.

However, most women I know have matured into successful, independent and confident women in their 30's, who know what they want and what they don't want.

They have made their own choices not to have children or to have them, many are financially solvent and active sexually. Some have chosen to develop second careers and interests and they have no interest in squandering their savings waltzing up a church aisle in some meringue for the sake of family and society expectations.
They are not interested in the approval of others and they are assertive enough to say no to such expectations.

I'm soo sooo soooo sorry he left you at the altar.

L.Jenkins

southsiderosie wrote: »

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Thats why I love women in there 30s not looking for any attachments. SEX

Darlughda

segaBOY wrote: »

I'm soo sooo soooo sorry he left you at the altar.

Actually thats what she'll do to you segaboy, if she has sense.
I divorced him instead.:)

southsiderosie

djhunter30 wrote: »

I wouldnt worry too much about that. With improving health women are capable of having kids much older so no rush! Im 25, so Im definately in no rush what so ever.

I think the "women can wait!" thing has been oversold, especially considering that fertility treatment centers are a booming multi-million dollar industry. It is progressively more difficult to have a baby after 35, and almost impossible for most women over 45. And the quality of your eggs declines over time - you are only born with so many, and the good ones go first.

Gunsfortoys

Darlughda wrote: »

However, most women I know have matured into successful, independent and confident women in their 30's, who know what they want and what they don't want.

They have made their own choices not to have children or to have them, many are financially solvent and active sexually. Some have chosen to develop second careers and interests and they have no interest in squandering their savings waltzing up a church aisle in some meringue for the sake of family and society expectations.
They are not interested in the approval of others and they are assertive enough to say no to such expectations.

Aye, sure they are so determined to prove this that they will shoot any bloke down in an instant with their independence just so they can tell themselves, I dont need a man. Usually they settle down with a cat though.

segaBOY

Darlughda wrote: »

Actually thats what she'll do to you segaboy, if she has sense.
I divorced him instead.:)

My wedding song will be Beyoncé "Put a ring on it"

Darlughda

Gunsfortoys wrote: »

Aye, sure they are so determined to prove this that they will shoot any bloke down in an instant with their independence just so they can tell themselves, I dont need a man. Usually they settle down with a cat though.

You keep telling yourself thats why you are being constantly rejected!:pac:

L.Jenkins

southsiderosie wrote: »

I think the "women can wait!" thing has been oversold, especially considering that fertility treatment centers are a booming multi-million dollar industry. It is progressively more difficult to have a baby after 35, and almost impossible for most women over 45. And the quality of your eggs declines over time - you are only born with so many, and the good ones go first.

I know it can be hard even for men, but I thought impossible me a too strong a word. Hard maybe, no sexual innuendo intended!

southsiderosie

Gunsfortoys wrote: »

Men in their twenties are the same, tis a pity really.

Why is it a pity? I'd say it is a pity for men in their 40s and 50s, especially since it is less scandalous for older women to hook up with younger men these days. There is a significant difference between a 26 year old and a 46 year old when it comes to sex, at least from my experience anyway. With a younger guy, you can start up the engine and go; with older guys, you have to let the car warm up a bit. Which is hard to do when your body is screaming

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Gunsfortoys

Darlughda wrote: »

You keep telling yourself thats why you are being constantly rejected!:pac:

LOL, I think you are a little too up yourself there, while I dont like rejection as much as the next man, I will never be a bitter divorcee clutching to whatever attention I get off of another, followed by the self satisfaction of rejecting them as cruelly and painfully as possible. At least you are on the internet though, good for you.

segaBOY

Gunsfortoys wrote: »

LOL, I think you are a little too up yourself there, while I dont like rejection as much as the next man, I will never be a bitter divorcee clutching to whatever attention I get off of another, followed by the self satisfaction of rejecting them as cruelly and painfully as possible. At least you are on the internet though, good for you.

And her cat in a bunny suit, don't forget her cat in a bunny suit.

Gunsfortoys

southsiderosie wrote: »

Why is it a pity? I'd say it is a pity for men in their 40s and 50s, especially since it is less scandalous for older women to hook up with younger men these days. There is a significant difference between a 26 year old and a 46 year old when it comes to sex, at least from my experience anyway. With a younger guy, you can start up the engine and go; with older guys, you have to let the car warm up a bit. Which is hard to do when your body is screaming

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I like the fact you come out and say it, I like this place a little better, interesting research. I agree with you though, I have been pulling older girls lately, they are good craic, although you do get the divorcees who are slightly bitter. Ever see that?

L.Jenkins

Gunsfortoys wrote: »

I like the fact you come out and say it, I like this place a little better, interesting research. I agree with you though, I have been pulling older girls lately, they are good craic, although you do get the divorcees who are slightly bitter. Ever see that?

Older women are some craic. Married women are even better. The sex does be wicked!

Mrmoe

I don't buy the view that women become raving bags of hormones between 30 & 35. I think the pressure to settle down and shack up with some man and have a baby is a cultural or pschological driving force. Biologically it makes more sense to have the urge to procreate much younger (teens/twenties). Psycholocially women see 35 as the deadline and are almost compelled because of this to have children whether they want them at the time or not.

Bonito

southsiderosie wrote: »

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Amateur. Food + Sex together and you're sorted.

segaBOY

El_Ganador wrote: »

Amateur. Food + Sex together and you're sorted.

That's what's great about older women. They know their way around the kitchen and can give a savage BJ.

Darlughda

Gunsfortoys wrote: »

I will never be a bitter divorcee clutching to whatever attention I get off of another, followed by the self satisfaction .

Chances are you will be an impotent, bitter, chip-on-his-shoulder divorcé one day, with 25yr old women running a mile from you,
whereas being a divorcée coming into my sexual prime has meant the offers from 25yr old men are becoming more plentiful. Sweet.:)