Don't know what to do anymore.

LegacyUser

Ok, I'm 29 male and I'm stuck in a rut.

Basically I'm unemployed and still living at home, and its killing me. I just can't find work, even before the recession I was having trouble so I decided to go back and do another degree. I graduated top of my class with a first class honours degree, and received commendations for my work and still I can't get anything. The problem is that finding work is almost impossible, I'm a smart person and I am very learned in my area of expertises, but there are simply no jobs. I log onto the internet every day and all I see are recruitment agency's posting vacancies, but they never actually contact you, maybe once in a blue moon.

I'm sick of my life, luckily finance wise I'm OK, I have no debt plus I don't drink and cook all my own meals, so I can live very happily with social welfare, but I need to find work for my sanity, for the feeling of contribution, to get an apartment or a house. I'm going crazy sitting in my room day after day.

The other thing is, when an opportunity finally does present itself, I get so attached to the idea and really build my hopes up, then after like 4 stages of the interview process you are told no. When you are rejected it really hurts, its like a break up, or being told someone you fancy things your worthless. The worst part is its always the same email "Although we were very impressed with your application bla bla bla". I really cant take it any more.

I don't bother looking for women any more either, I'm a good looking tall guy, get loads of attention, but that's all I got going for me, I have nothing else to talk about with girls.

I put on a brave face, but its getting to the point where I can't even be bothered to look any more. I'm also smoking a little weed to counteract the boredom, which I don't think is doing me any good, but I'm just so uninterested in life, its like a consolation prize.

Thing is I want to have it all, house, wife, kids, nice car, and I know I can have it, I know once I get into one of these jobs I will shine. I am very good at what I do, but I can't seem to show that to the people who are interviewing me.

How can I get out of this rut? Any advice would be brilliant.

LegacyUser

hi, i understand how u feel.

hang on there. dont give up, things will go better later, you are still young.

i remembered i sent out 200+ application letters and i got just 10 invitations for interview. and that none employed me. finally i got a job that wages were far below the standard. the job was far from ideal, not to mention their ethic was not i agree.

hang on there. maybe you can do some evening courses something like that while you are waiting for jobs?

LegacyUser

Hi OP

Are you fixating too much on only getting a job in your area of expertise/training?! Why don't you change your focus a little and just aim to get yourself A job (there are jobs out there!)..Sales , Retail, Administration or anything like that, for the short term, with the focus being on meeting people, socialising and building contacts & networking... I think you are limiting yourself a bit at the moment by only trying to find a job in your field of qualifications. I took on part-time work for 18 months in an area I had little or no experience of! It was a challenge, and I hated it some days, but I focused on the positive - i learned something new, I proved my adapability to myself (and future employers on my CV) and it kept the bills paid during a quiet period in my normal line of work...Plus I made a few new friends and useful contacts in the process... give it a shot. It will not be a waste of your time.

Kila

Hi OP,

You may already have been given this advice, so if so, my apologies for repeating it. Have you considered volunteering somewhere for a while? It won't help with the financial situation, but may just give you a new lease on life, and will get you out of your house. Perhaps see if there are any organisations looking for volunteers in your area, local schools that may be interested in help supervising classes or perhaps teaching an after-hours club in your particular subject area, etc. It could give you something to do, pick up your spirits, and you'll have some experience to put on the CV too.

Also, as has been said, perhaps try looking slightly outside your field. It may not be a permanent change, but getting into a work routine, even in a temporary job, may help. I know that it's dismal getting rejected by an employer. When I interviewed to move job a year or so ago, my first 2 interviews, I didn't get the job. They phrased it nicely (looking for someone with more experience, etc) but it was still gutting. It can be hard to keep going, so this is why I recommend trying something different in terms of volunteering or learning a new skill, simply to take a break from the monotony of searching, and to cheer you up!

Redpunto

Go do some volunter work, there are lots of agencies out there gagging for all kinds of help and if youre as resourceful as you say you are they'd be delighted with some of your time.

LegacyUser

Am the same OP i'm your almost 29 and living at home, am getting casual work now but the work is just awful and if i'm lucky I make over 200e. it feels pretty pathetic! I am feeling very down about the whole thing as I feel I'll never get out of this rut and like you I just think if I could just get a break and get a decent job I'd be all set to buy the house, new car and find a husband if thats possible lol
I also know what you mean about meeting people, its like the last thing I want to do is explain what I do and how I can't get a job. But really when i think about it when i had a job i didn't actually talk about it to men... wasn't the kind of job lads would have been interested in!
I am trying to be objective about it though and realise that its not just me thats a complete 'reject' there are lots out there who cannot get a job right now.
As for interviews you really just have to try your best and not get so upset over rejections. There are just so many people looking for a job right now and so many of them may have much more experience than you, there is nothing you can do about that. And when an employer has 2 equally great people to choose from this or something else small out of your control could be the deciding factor. But I do know what you mean about getting your hopes up, you'd nearly be checking daft for apartments before you even get the interview...
I think volunteering is a good idea, although I haven't yet, it will give you something to put on your cv and it could be something to talk about in interviews. Have you thought at all about looking for work abroad?
Unemployment is rough I never really thought i'd be in this position.. am dying for it to end so I can live my life!

Nolanger

Here's what to do. Travel around Ireland visiting all the sh*t towns and observe the effects the recession has had on our country. Take notes, interview people, visit ghost estates, the closed factories, the colleges with bright young people set to emigrate soon - write it all into a book. Call it 'Still on our knees' and get the thing published.

Pigeon Reaper

Keep looking for a job but in the meantime as redpunot suggests have you thought about helping others and volunteering in your locality? It will help you avoid the boredom and give you some satisfaction. Going out and doing something will give you some routine and a reason to get up. It shouldn't interfere with you looking for a job either.