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Please criticise these poems

  • 10-05-2010 12:19pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi would be grateful for some constructive criticism on the following two poems. Thanks.

    Trust

    A close friendship is an important thing to have in life.
    To be there for someone when they need you and for them to care enough to say hello and how are you today?
    Trust is a rare thing and like life it is precious and something to be cherished.
    Sometimes I remember how close you and I used to be. A nostalgic time perhaps when the stone wall around my heart crumbled and was filled with awe and admiration.
    To be able to speak of things unheard or unspoken of only to be betrayed and for that cold hard stone fortress to reappear.

    Poetry
    Poetry is an indulgence, a self centred one.
    It is secret and safe and you can claim it means nothing, is not personal.
    Yet all things are personal until you set them free.
    Then they are nothing, just scraps, sometimes kept, gossiped about but more often than not discarded and forgotten about.


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