Not entitled to free pre-school

youtwat

Hi

My daughter will be three in August and is starting pre-school in September, then going on to main school when she turns four, in 2011. Because she doesn't turn three by 30 June she is not entitled to her year's free preschool - I find this very unfair; she will be the only one in her class who is not entitled, as she is the youngest in her class. I know there is a push to keep children from attending main school until they are five, but I don't think parents who disagree should be penalised as a result. I have had my daughter's name down for this pre-school and school since she was six months old, and to change now would mean she would lose her place. It is hard to know that I have to pay €60 per week for a full year when every other child in the class is attending free. She is three on 7th August so effectively she misses out by 37 days. Can I have your thoughts on this please, or would anyone be able to advise me on who I should contact to appeal? Thanks!

Nevyn

With her turning 3 so late in the year they expect you not to start her in jr infants until she is 5 rather then when she has just turned 4.

youtwat

I know that but I feel she's more than ready and having already had her in creche (for which I'm paying) I will have to keep her there a further year before sending her to school, so either way it looks like I lose out...

metrovelvet

My son is three last week in June and he doesnt qualify for september either, but Im not going to start him in real school when he is four anyway.

But yeah, they didnt think it through. ITs not right.

Nevyn

youtwat wrote: »

I know that but I feel she's more than ready and having already had her in creche (for which I'm paying) I will have to keep her there a further year before sending her to school, so either way it looks like I lose out...

What will be the age demographic of the class she would be put in when she is in jr infants?

It used to be that kids were all aged between 4/5 and these days it's more 5/6 and a younger child can get lost in the mix if they are the lower edge of the age bellcurve in the class.

Kindle Mont.

As a montessori owner/teacher myself I fully agree that they haven't thought this scheme through, it is riddled with flaws. However I do think sending a child who has just turned 4 into junior infants is not ideal, my own son's birthday is in August, and I certainly won't be sending him to primary school until he is 5, and that will be after 2 full years of Montessori.

What is the rush in sending your child so young? You have to consider when she does her leaving cert she will be that much younger than her peers, and the extra year's maturity would stand to her. Also a year in a good montessori school would hugely benefit her.

youtwat

She will be one of the younger ones in her class, they seem to be starting later nowadays but I am happy to send her to main school when she is four. I feel that if it is an issue at a later stage, transition year being one of the options. I do feel that after a year in preschool (which children years ago didn't have before being sent to school at four) she will be more than ready. I have thought this through for a long time and I'm not rushing into it, I feel it is the right thing for my child at this time. I feel that I shouldn't be penalised for the decision. I could understand losing out for a month or so, but to lose out on a full year to me is disgraceful.

Nevyn

My daughers birthday is the start of july and she started school after she turned 4 that September. She was well able for jr infants to 2nd class but is started to struggle once she moved to the Snr school. She is the youngest in her year, she's 10 this july most of her class are already 11 and will be 12 before the new year.

She's bright, it's not the work it's the maturity levels at that age and she has suffered exclusion because of it. At the time I felt I made the right choice, she really wanted to start school, now honestly I am worried for her.

deisemum

There were a couple of children in my sons classes that had June birthdays and they started school the September after turning 4. Initially they were ok but as they progressed through the years in school their immaturity became more obvious and they ended up having to repeat a year.

2 of the mothers that I spoke with regretted sending them when they were so young because not only were they not as mature as their classmates but when they repeated it meant having to make new classmates and leaving their existing ones.

I think whoever is paying for the places are entitled to set the rules they see fit and I do see their reasoning in moving to children being older starting school and is more in line yet still behind what's considered the norm in a lot of european countries.

Also some consideration must be given to the teachers if they have a lot of children that are on the young end of the school year and trying to teach at the same time as well as trying to manage a class.

littlebug

I struggled with the decision when my child was 4 (born in May) and decided not to send her til she was 5 and I haven't regretted it. To be honest at the time my decision was because I thought that though she was able for it academically she wasn't emotionally.
Now in first class she would be at the upper end of her class ability wise but she still finds some of the work very hard (sums etc). Her best friend who is a year younger and started at 4 is really struggling with them though she is a bright girl. The differences wouldn't have been obvious in the first two years.

I know that's not what your thread is about OP and you decision is made but I do think you need to bear in mind that she will be in class with some children that are anything up to a year and a half older than her.

metrovelvet

Also physically - it must be very intimidating to be physically smaller than everyone. And stamina wise too. And what that means in the playground, phys ed etc down the line. You'll never get picked for any of the teams! Your status within the classroom must be affected too. And all your little counterparts are still at playschool, playing with sand and water, dreaming of apples and ducks.

lazygal

I am a Montessori teacher and I have to agree that in my experience five is better to start school. She might seem ready now but every primary teacher will tell you at first class and third class the younger ones can start to fall behind. It will never do her harm to have another preschool year but it will be much harder to deal with the issues she may face later on.
Every time I have recommended a child who will not be five or nearly there in Sept. should have another year, but the parents send them anyway, they have hit a wall later on. It might be first class or first year in secondary, but you need to consider how old she will be when her peers want to do certain things. My cousin went to college at 17 (even having done transition year) and has found it difficult to mix, socialise etc due to the "college lifestyle" which revolves around the pub(it is the way things are I'm afraid!).
Bottom line, I think five is the right age for school, from an emotional and psychological perspective, never mind the academics.

cynder

Thaedydal wrote: »

My daughers birthday is the start of july and she started school after she turned 4 that September. She was well able for jr infants to 2nd class but is started to struggle once she moved to the Snr school. She is the youngest in her year, she's 10 this July most of her class are already 11 and will be 12 before the new year.

She's bright, it's not the work it's the maturity levels at that age and she has suffered exclusion because of it. At the time I felt I made the right choice, she really wanted to start school, now honestly I am worried for her.

Same as my lady she was 3 starting school and turned 4 twenty days later. she did great at pre school and was really on top of things (knew how to count to 100, all the colours, all the shapes, and was very out going and could talk the head off you, many of whom that started with her were unable to do) she was also great during jr and sr infants but 1st class was hard she memorised her school reading books cover to cover but could not read some words. she was kept back in 1st class as she would be 11 starting secondary school which isnt allowed in our area and would have to do an extra year in 6th class which would be more detrimental as all her friends would be gone, shes 10 and in 4th class and is on par with everyone else. ( her school allows children to start school if they turn 4 before the 30th of sept)

my boy turns 5 in July and will be starting school in September. he is in pre school at the moment and they claim his a right clever clogs and will do well at school.

After our first lady we decided it was better to start our son when he was 5. My next lad will be 4 and 3/4 when he starts next year as i find 5 3/4 a bit too old. But he might have to start at 5 3/4 if we get told he is developmentally delayed (he has issues) he is getting an sna but hours are not determined yet. also if we are told he is developmentally delayed we get an extra years free pre school for him.

youtwat

Thanks for all the replies.. I may keep her at the preschool for two years if at all possible judging on all the info I'm getting.. I don't know if it will be possible to get keep her at this preschool for two years but I might send her to another one for a year before sending her to school. I'm too late to change my mind re sending her to preschool in September (deposit paid etc) but maybe I could keep her from going to school itself until she's five..

cynder

if i could turn back time i would have left my lady for another year.

I hope all works out for you, 2 years having fun and learning at the same time isnt bad its great, she will be defo ready when she starts school and would really excel insted of just hanging on by a thread.


good luck:)

LegacyUser

Our son will be 5 in July and will start school this year, he has had 2 years at Montessori. He has come on leaps and bounds in the past year, socially and academically, the year has meant a lot.

Our daughter's birthday is early August and there is no way she will be going to school until she has turned 5. She is streets ahead of her big brother, is very much a leader (bossy boots) and has been going to Montessori full time since before Christmas. I feel that she may well be ready at 4 for school however we have decided if she is getting bored at her montessori then we will move her to another in the area for her last year before school. She will have done 2.5yrs of pre-school which is a lot but she she is thriving there.

The main thing for us is that we would rather our child was amongst the oldest in his/her class later on than the youngest, i.e. 16 in a class of mainly 15 yr olds than 15 in a class of 16 yr olds. The latter can give rise to extra problems re boundaries, etc.

littlebug

youtwat wrote: »

Thanks for all the replies.. I may keep her at the preschool for two years if at all possible judging on all the info I'm getting.. I don't know if it will be possible to get keep her at this preschool for two years but I might send her to another one for a year before sending her to school. I'm too late to change my mind re sending her to preschool in September (deposit paid etc) but maybe I could keep her from going to school itself until she's five..

I think that would be the best option. Of all the people I talked to, threads I read on this forum and elsewhere I heard loads of people say they regretted starting them too young but not one that regretted keeping them an extra year. My eldest ended up having a year at a playschool and a year at Montessori. Could you opt for a P/T place for the first year to keep the costs down?

Nevyn

It used to be that everyone started school at age 4ish but thats shifted over the last few years.

LegacyUser

As the child of a primary school teacher who teaches infants, my mother regularly says that the older a child can start school the better. It's not the academic intelligence...it's the maturity, and it becomes increasingly evident as the child gets older, particularly with boys.

Maggiesims

Hi youtwat I will also miss out on my little boy's free playschool year. He will be four in July and will have two years spent at play school.

We have decided to send him to school in sept. this year. I have got all the "oh don't send him he will not be able for it" or "whats your rush to send him" from people.

I asked some of my younger friends ie. 23 to 26 yrs olds what age they started school at. Most of the ones that started when they were 5 said they were 19 when finishing secondary school and then spend 3-4 years in college. At 23 they had no job or savings & some didn't stay at college because they wanted a job and money and felt they were too old to be in college. My 23 year old friend started at 4, didn't do transition year, finished school at 16, college for 2 year, joined guards at 18 and qualified at 21.

We all want to do the best for our kids, my little boy will be bored at playschool for another year and feel he will benefit better from school and Youtwat you know your child best and I am just trying to point out that there are "Pros" and cons to send your child at 4.

lazygal

Maggiesims wrote: »

Hi youtwat I will also miss out on my little boy's free playschool year. He will be four in July and will have two years spent at play school.

We have decided to send him to school in sept. this year. I have got all the "oh don't send him he will not be able for it" or "whats your rush to send him" from people.

I asked some of my younger friends ie. 23 to 26 yrs olds what age they started school at. Most of the ones that started when they were 5 said they were 19 when finishing secondary school and then spend 3-4 years in college. At 23 they had no job or savings & some didn't stay at college because they wanted a job and money and felt they were too old to be in college. My 23 year old friend started at 4, didn't do transition year, finished school at 16, college for 2 year, joined guards at 18 and qualified at 21.

We all want to do the best for our kids, my little boy will be bored at playschool for another year and feel he will benefit better from school and Youtwat you know your child best and I am just trying to point out that there are "Pros" and cons to send your child at 4.

For every one anecdote like this I could show you ten children who were held behind in first or third class because they went to school too young. Based on my professional experience working with children in most cases five is the best age to start. Like I said earlier in the thread, every time a parent has sent a child into school at just about four, even though I have recommended they keep them at home or in school another year, he or she has to repeat a year. Its disruptive for the child, they have to make new friends and the guilt parents have about the choice they made and the regrets they have is heartbreaking.

ebmma

what about 4.5 yrs? :-)

lazygal

I would send a 5.5 year old to school, not a 4.5 year old:). Like I said, a child will never do badly because of a extra preschool year, but may well be left behind in big school when the consequences of that are much greater.
Five for school I say!

ebmma

lazygal wrote: »

I would send a 5.5 year old to school, not a 4.5 year old:). Like I said, a child will never do badly because of a extra preschool year, but may well be left behind in big school when the consequences of that are much greater.
Five for school I say!

guess should have signed him up for school in 2015

lazygal

If you are concerned I would talk to the school and see if you can defer for a year.
Of course you know your child and I don't, but I really would say five or over is better for the child and the parent, in terms of long-term views!

ebmma

lazygal wrote: »

If you are concerned I would talk to the school and see if you can defer for a year.
Of course you know your child and I don't, but I really would say five or over is better for the child and the parent, in terms of long-term views!

well he's 2 months old at the moment so you can say I don't know him very well
I signed him up for a local Educate together because they are '1st come 1st served'. I'm not too worried because by the time I'll need to make the decision we might not even live in the same area (we're renting).
I guess I'll see what he's like physically and mentally when time comes.

I went to school at 7 (not from Ireland) so the system is going to be all new to me

lazygal

So you have lots of time!!!!
Honestly I can only go from my years of teaching children and 99% of the time five is good for starting school. There is no need to rush him in at 4.5, he'll be just as good going a year later!:)

LashingLady

EBEmma I enrolled my little boy for the Educate Together in Ranelagh and in Kilbarrack (wasn't sure where I would be living) when he was 7 weeks old (he's nearly 2 now). I filled in two forms, one for the year he will be 4 and one when he will be 5. To be honest I didn't have any intention of sending him when he's 4 but wanted to have options....

He was born in June and when I enquired about his place on the list they told me he was around 200th on the list for the year he is 4!! So not a chance he would be getting in. If your local ET is very heavily subscribed I would consider putting his name down for the following year I would say he would be right at the top of that list. I know that the one in Ranelagh lets you have name down for two different years whereas the North Bay one you have to choose a year now so they all have different policies that you would need to check on.

ebmma

LashingLady wrote: »

EBEmma I enrolled my little boy for the Educate Together in Ranelagh and in Kilbarrack (wasn't sure where I would be living) when he was 7 weeks old (he's nearly 2 now). I filled in two forms, one for the year he will be 4 and one when he will be 5. To be honest I didn't have any intention of sending him when he's 4 but wanted to have options....

He was born in June and when I enquired about his place on the list they told me he was around 200th on the list for the year he is 4!! So not a chance he would be getting in. If your local ET is very heavily subscribed I would consider putting his name down for the following year I would say he would be right at the top of that list. I know that the one in Ranelagh lets you have name down for two different years whereas the North Bay one you have to choose a year now so they all have different policies that you would need to check on.

thanks, that's great to know!! it's the one in Ranelagh. I'll print the 2nd form straight away!

di11on

There a phenomenon that's called the "Age Position Effect".

Studies have shown that children who are towards the upper end of the age range amongst their class mates are more likely to perform better academically.

Interestingly, this study finds that it is less of a factor for gifted children.

lazygal

I have taught gifted children (only a few, they are VV rare) and IME they need preschool for socialisation more than anything. I teach Montessori and the social skills are a major part of the day, Gifted children always excell but sometimes they need big help with socialisation.

littlebug

My youngest child is academically very much ahead of his class peers and I knew this would be the case before he started. Yes he can get bored at times but in junior infants he is right where he needs to be socially and emotionally. He is also a little awkward with the more physical stuff so being with an older group would have been horrible for him. His month of birth kind of worked in his favour though...4 +10 months starting so starting any younger wouldn't have been an option anyway.

di11on

What's the rush in the end of the day?

I was 4 about 3 days whan I started.. did my leaving at 16... was that good? I was gifted so I got on ok! Lol... only joking.

Anyway, I could probably have done with a year or two more to smell the roses along the way.

All things considered, your child will benefit, at least socially, from the year in pre-school and will probably do better in jr. infants, being that bit older. Also more likely to be better for his self confidence, being towards the older end of the range.

Early isn't alway better... :-)

paperclip2

My daughter turned 4 in August and started school the following September. She's now 14 and doing Junior Cert. We had no problems with socialisation or learning ability all the way through. She's doing transition year because I want her to have a bit of a break before the leaving cert. Also if she continued she would be just 16 doing the Leaving which is waaaaay too young I think.

Her little brother turned four last Monday, he's been in playschool for almost a year but I'm not letting him go to school until he turns 5. Although hes just as bright as his sister he needs that extra year. I think it will stand to him later on. Different kids need different things.

ztoical

di11on wrote: »

What's the rush in the end of the day?

I was 4 about 3 days whan I started.. did my leaving at 16... was that good? I was gifted so I got on ok! Lol... only joking.

Anyway, I could probably have done with a year or two more to smell the roses along the way.

All things considered, your child will benefit, at least socially, from the year in pre-school and will probably do better in jr. infants, being that bit older. Also more likely to be better for his self confidence, being towards the older end of the range.

Early isn't alway better... :-)

Like some have said there are pros and cons to both....I think parents know what suits their child better. I started school the day after my 4th birthday with the plan I would repeat a year early on....there never seemed to be a good point to repeat, every teacher said I was doing fine and I just kept going. Was the youngest in my year the whole way to leaving cert never bothered me, did the LC at 16 and went to college in the September. I liked being younger when I started college as I felt I had more room to try a few different options and not be in the rush to get through college and into the work force as some of the older people on the course. Partially cus of my age I ended up doing two college degrees that have tied in well together.

thesimpsons

my daughter started school at 4yr + 2 months. Have never regretted it and now she's in 5th yr secondary. She is in the top 3 students in her year, and the others are all amoung the youngest in the year too!!!!! In her class there is an age gap of almost 2 yrs between youngest and the eldest. The older ones are already 18 and it causes its own problems being in school as virtually an adult. They can and want to socialise, drive, drink, do their own thing but yet they are held by rules and regulations of school, homework, etc. On the plus side of being older in late secondary school, they are often more mature on subject choices and career choices. But being the oldest in the class can lead to its own type of bullying too.

I know its a long time ahead for the OP but whatever you decide, don't have regrets in the future about your decision, just handle it as it comes along. You will never know whether its right to start school younger or older cos they are all different. my daughters best friend in jnr infants was almost a year older than my dd but she was held back in 1st class cos she wasn't mature enough to go onwards. To whose who continuously quoted me that 4yrs is too young, that you'll regret it starting them early, etc etc, the only answer is that "they are all different". For any research/talk that shows you that younger starters suffer, you will find just about the same amount of research/talk that older starters are too old.

iguana

lazygal wrote: »

For every one anecdote like this I could show you ten children who were held behind in first or third class because they went to school too young. Based on my professional experience working with children in most cases five is the best age to start. Like I said earlier in the thread, every time a parent has sent a child into school at just about four, even though I have recommended they keep them at home or in school another year, he or she has to repeat a year.

I'm really surprised to hear this from a montessori teacher seeing as how one of the main ethos' of montessorri is that children's education should not be based on their age and age segregation. That children should be allowed to develop themselves based on their own ability and that their age is largely irrelevant to this.

tscul32

"my daughter started school at 4yr + 2 months. Have never regretted it and now she's in 5th yr secondary. She is in the top 3 students in her year"

My mam could have written this when I was in 5th year. She'd even say it now. But I was the one who went to school after turning 4 in July and did the LC at 16 and I wouldn't send my kids at that age.
Mine are nov/dec babies so will go to school at 4y9/10m.

deisemum

If a child is on the young side and parents are thinking that transition year will give a bit more time to mature or not be too young doing the leaving cert well transition year isn't available in every school and in a lot of schools where it's available only a minority of pupils may avail of it and with the way cutbacks are and are set to continue they may not even exist when your child gets to that year.

My son will be 15 this coming September and will be going into Junior Cert and he hopes he'll be accepted to do transition year the year after. The school runs an excellent transition year programme so it's always over subscribed so he's not guaranteed a place.

youtwat

It's good to see so many different opinions. My daughter (honestly) is brighter than any other child I know, she can write her name since she was 2.6 years, she can memorise books, she honestly is very very bright. I know intellect is no substitute for maturity when she gets older but I am going to send her to preschool now when she is 3 for the stimulation more than anything, and then take her teacher's advice on whether or not to keep her back for a year, which I'll be more than happy to do if and when the time comes. I don't want to rush her but I don't want to keep her where she is at the moment as I don't feel it's doing her any good other than socially.

lazygal

iguana wrote: »

I'm really surprised to hear this from a montessori teacher seeing as how one of the main ethos' of montessorri is that children's education should not be based on their age and age segregation. That children should be allowed to develop themselves based on their own ability and that their age is largely irrelevant to this.

And if you studied it you would know that the age profiles for Montessori are 0-3, 3-6, 6-9, 9-12, 12-15 and 15-18, in order that teacher ensures each child reaches certain milestones.
The Irish system means I teach age 3 to 5-if I could teach them until 6 in Montessori I would.
Age is inherently relevent in Montessori-you can read the Secret of Childhood or the Discovery of the Child and see how Montessori studied children of various ages to track their development.

cynder

My lady memorised all her books cover to cover. when you read her a story she knew if you missed out a word (this i have also heard from many other parents as well).

When my boy was 2 he learnt how to work the computer himself, his 4 and even has his own windows profile where he can go on the Internet and go onto his favorite sites, he also has games on the computer and can go through the start menu and drop down menu to access them (has being doing that since he was 2.5 years) however he does not recite books cover to cover. He got a nintendo ds when he was 3 and can work his way round the playstaion 3. He also knows hoe to start up and close down the computer, can work the web cam and has skype so he can talk to his granny in the uk.

My other little boy who is 3 uses google talk to call his daddy at work and is getting to know the computer, can start up and shut down the computer and can load the games from the desk top, he can go on the internet to his favorite sites and play playhouse disney and disney games. and he is being assessed for an asd and adhd...... but there is no way im going to claim they are better then any other child, but as my motto goes ITS NICE TO BE IMPORTANT BUT ITS MORE IMPORTANT TO BE NICE.

Each have an area where they excel. It pointless putting another child down so you feel your child is better.

littlebug

Who wasn't nice?

We all think our own are the brightest
It's pretty much impossible to compare your own child with others. You don't know what another child can do at home when they're in their comfort zone. Access to computers and books (and parents that actively encourage and foster learning) are all things that make a difference at that age. (by that I mean the child who doesn't have them isn't necessarily any less innately clever).

But..no matter how clever a 4 year old is I think it will still be tough when they are 6 and doing the same maths tests as others in the class who are nearly 7 1/2.

For those who are saying they started at 4 and were fine... yes lots of people did and are but nowadays it is more the norm to start at 4.5 +. Some schools won't take a child if they haven't turned 4 before the summer. So that's another one to watch out for and check with your school OP.

average_runner

No offence but the rule is a good idea.

I went to school at 4, birthday was in august that year, was a few others in our class also. Came to leaving cert year and all of us decided to repeat the year before(all in different secondary schools and didnt know we all made the same decision until years later on a reunion), not because we were stupid jsut because we all felt we were too young to make an important decision on your career at 16, just gone 16 at that.


Also be very careful in pushing a kid to school when they are too young, very open to bullying in secondary school as they are a year under developed compare to most. Schools cant stop the bullying before you think they will.

littlebug

average_runner wrote: »

Also be very careful in pushing a kid to school when they are too young, very open to bullying in secondary school as they are a year under developed compare to most. Schools cant stop the bullying before you think they will.

+1 100%. One of my peers went through school as the youngest and smallest by far (but also one of the brightest) . By 13 she was in tears going to school everyday and even contemplated suicide. This was an extreme case I know but I do think parents need to think much further ahead than their bright 4 year old being ready for school now.

deisemum

For those of you who started school at an early age and are now out of the school system well primary school is so different now to when ye were in school as the curriculum and a lot of the teaching methods changed back in 2000 or there abouts.

average_runner

Yes alot has changed in teaching methods but children havent changed that much.

Bullying happens alot and alot of the time its the youngest that gets it, and none of that has changed.

cynder

littlebug wrote: »

+1 100%. One of my peers went through school as the youngest and smallest by far (but also one of the brightest) . By 13 she was in tears going to school everyday and even contemplated suicide. This was an extreme case I know but I do think parents need to think much further ahead than their bright 4 year old being ready for school now.

Very true, but unfortunately people (like me) dont realise it until you do it to your first one. My lady was very young only 3 starting Jr infants. But it all caught up with her in first class and then we realised she would be very, very young starting secondary school so we kept her back. She gets on a lot better with this class. Least im not making the mistake with my 2 boys.

I think in this day and age social skills are just as important as education, with out social skills people can become very withdrawn and even as above contemplate suicide.

I have a neighbour whos son is in 2nd class he had an assessment done by the school and they wanted to move him up a year to 3rd class (he is only 7) and the mother declined and the father agreed (they are separated), his mother asked what i thought and i said keep him where he is as it would be better for him socially and she agreed as he is a very quiet child, he gets given harder sheets to do as he is very, very intelligent and can get bored with 2nd class homework. The school have very high hopes for this young lad, but he should be able to enjoy his childhood without having to live up to expectations. He will be assessed again next year so its not as if he has lost out on a once in a lifetime opportunity.

youtwat

Each have an area where they excel. It pointless putting another child down so you feel your child is better.[/QUOTE]

I hope it didn't sound like I was putting down any other child, that wasn't my intention...

cynder

No worries,

I take it your a young mum of one who is totaly full of pride for her little one, thats perfect. Every mum should feel the same about their kids.

If i take a look at each child in my sons preschool they all have there little things that that are good at, one girl is a fantastic artist, another boy can handle the football like david beckham, they told me my son is very bright and takes in all the info and will be good at school (they could have said that to every parent in there), one of the boys is wired up to high heaven but he makes all the other kids laugh (my boy is made sit next to this boy because he calms him down(my boy is quiet)).

I cant sit here and say my boy is any better than any of the kids in his pre school, they are each lovely kids who will develop at their own rate, in 10 years time if you take a look at these bunch of kids things could be way different, my boy could become the class clown or an artist or a footballer, but most of all i want him to be happy, to be happy with himself. We have no expectations of him only that he tries, im not sitting here thinking of all the A's he is going to get, he might join the army instead or become a mechanic or plumber. Enjoying his childhood is the most i want from him now, the same goes of each of my 3 kids.

Perhaps when you have more kids and reach your 30's you might see it from a similar point of view. My daughter nearly died twice in the last 3 years and that really brings home whats important.

Take care and enjoy her early years as you never get them back again, wait until she reaches 9 and she will tell you she knows more than you do....:D

youtwat

grindelwald wrote: »

No worries,

I take it your a young mum of one who is totaly full of pride for her little one, thats perfect. Every mum should feel the same about their kids.

I am indeed a Mum of one but oh how I wish I had yet to reach my thirties and how I wish I hadn't gone through a similar experience as your own.
Don't believe all the posts I put up here (i.e. 'a bit about yourself') I don't like to give too much information away.
To be honest (and please don't take this the wrong way) your last post comes across somewhat presumptious and patronising. Some good advice nonethess