Getting girl back.

LegacyUser

Hey just a background. Sorry its long.

I'm in a new city Australia, met this girl shes new to the city but only from a town 30 minutes away. We are both 25. We were seeing each other for 4 months. We fought abit about little things and I know we saw alot of each other but we didnt know much people and it just happened.

It was all good and we both admitted to having feelings for each other, until 2 weeks ago she went out in her hometown got extremely drunk. I looked at her phone 2 days later and had saw she text an ex at 3.30 in the morning, I know I was out of line to have looked at the phone, I just knew something was up. She admitted she text him and I said she was obviously looking for sex, she didn't deny it.

Nothing happened having seeing the texts and she admitted was feeling bad about it she said was stupid and the old place brought back memorys and all that. I believed her as I like her decided to forgive her and she wanted to try. 3 days after I forgave her I had a huge fight with her I couldn't help but bring it up I called her some terrable names she slapped me and I pushed her away then, I admit aggresively but I would never hit a woman.

The weekend just gone then I went and got very drunk drinking all day with the one person I know here I admit I smoked alot of pot to which I dont do. I text her and we arranged to meet she seemed happy to meet. I was way to drunk and ended up breaking down abit, I punched a wall too. I woke up the next day not remembering much.

I was out of character all week but I know it all stemmed from insecurities I had from the text I saw, I kept bringing it up which was wrong. She said she needs time to think now and see's it as over saying maybe we should just be friends as she wants me in her life still but doesnt know what is going to happen with us yet.

She believes Im sorry and knows it was out of character all week which it was! She says though she doesn't know about me now due to the aggression she saw and the words I called her which were very degrading.

Her birthday is Saturday and she is having a party with a few people she works with and few friends. She said I should go. Im really at a loss as of what to do as I really like her She has text me once or twice since and rang me the last 2 nights without me contacting her at all. I usually talk to her alot but havent to give her space. I also agreed to meet her Friday to hand back something she owns.

Any advice on what I should do?? I would like her back

Ickle Magoo

It sounds like pretty terrible relationship to begin with, why do you want it back? She was gung-ho for cheating, you got drunk and pushed her, she just wants to be friends, you call her degrading names?!

Chalk it up to experience and find someone who isn't texting exes for sex - oh, and get some help with your insecurities and paranoia because next to infidelity, they are two of the fastest ways to destroy a relationship.

Best of luck.

davyjose

I don't think this one's salvageable, mate. the fact is, 4 months is not a long time, and if it starts off this bad it's only going to get worse. you both clearly have little real respect for one another. I can kinda see why you felt the need to flip out, but that doesn't make it acceptable. And it also shows you know deep down that she pretty much killed the relationship doing what she did. Your subsequent behaviour buried it.

Look, four months is not a long time. In a few weeks you'll be over her. do you really want to be with someone who tried to cheat on you, and is now taking the moral high ground with regard to your behaviour? Even if you begged and pleaded and threw your dignity out the window for a girl you've know a few months, and she took you back .... she'd still have done what she did.

Take some time out, spend time with friends, have fun, play the field. At 25 you don't need the stress.

Also, with regard to her ex, yeah it was probably sex she was looking for alright, but also that she still has feelings for him -- after all, she could have phoned you for sex.

LegacyUser

Hey thanks for the replies.

Yes I think I knew all that just needed some one to say it be honest, main reason is probly just not knowing to many people In Australia. I'll sort it though.

Met up with her last night she seemed as if really wanted to give it a try but Im not sure if a point. I'd probly be a fool and setting myself up for more problems in the not so far future if keep it going after the texting the ex.

I'll go along to the birthday as I think it would be bad not to and then see how I feel next week.