Growing Up Gay on RTE

eaglach

Just thought some people might be interested in catching this show on RTE next Monday:

A two-part documentary series exploring the experiences of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender young people growing up in Ireland.


As recently as 1993, homosexuality was illegal in Ireland. As the first generation born after decriminalisation comes of age, this series seeks to establish how much has changed in Irish society in the intervening years. For young people, whose lives revolve around school and the family, is it any easier to be lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender today than it was 17 years ago?


Filmed over 18 months, Growing Up Gay follows the lives of six young people and, in the process, captures the challenging and even hostile experiences which lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender young people face in their everyday lives. The series also explores the more universal experiences of growing up - from the ups and downs of life at home and at school, to friendships and falling in love. By presenting the human stories behind labels such as 'gay' or 'lesbian', the series aims to alleviate the stigma surrounding various expressions of sexual identity.

Rick_

Is Derek Mooney presenting/narrating this?

oisindoyle

Eternal Wonderer wrote: »

Is Derek Mooney presenting/narrating this?

Why the funny face ?

Dr. Baltar

Eternal Wonderer wrote: »

Is Derek Mooney presenting/narrating this?

No, I think it's Gay Byrne :P

ElectricGirl

What time is it on at?

BeLonG_To

BeLonG To Youth Services has worked with Crossing the Line Productions and RTE on this for almost 4 years. We can't believe the first episode is airing this Monday!!

'Growing Up Gay' is a two part documentary series which portraits the real lives of LGBT young people in Ireland over an 18 month period. We think that the content of this documentary series, and the fact that it is being shown on prime time television, marks a huge shift in Irish society.

When we started our work seven years ago LGBT young people were all but invisible in Ireland, in their schools, communities and certainly in the media. Growing Up Gay brings their real life experiences into every sitting room in the country, and provides LGBT young people with a platform to voice what is going on for them.

Riyadh and Siobhan (two young people featured in the documentary) are on the Late Late tonight to talk about it and then the series airs on RTÉ 1 at 9.30pm on Mon 19th and Mon 26th April.

Exciting!

KnifeWRENCH

Eternal Wonderer wrote: »

Is Derek Mooney presenting/narrating this?

I fcuking hope not. Listening to that gimp is the one thing that would put me off watching it. :mad:
Besides, if RTE felt like they needed someone gay to narrate it, they'd probably go with Anna Nolan.

L1011

They'd definitely not go for someone who's closet-situation is so confused that nobody knows for sure if its confirmed or not; anyway.

Anna Nolan and Brendan Courtenay it is then!

rainbow kirby

This is starting on the Late Late show now, btw.

Heebie

Set the DVR for Monday & Tuesday.

TylerIE

Fair play to the two who did the interview on the Late Late.

Both of them were great ambassadors for "the gay community" in that they spoke clearly about situations that many people could relate to.

Furthermore for anybody who currently does not know anybody whose gay they may have learned that not all gay people are the typical stereotypes.... I look forward to the documentary.

Newport81

that girl on late late sayin she knew since she was 12 and wore a 'nobody knows I'm a lesi' tshirt to school the next day what a load of bull. u don't know your arse from your elbow at that age she almost to gay to function and she had that stereotypical lesbonic look, who Is she helping exactly?

rant over

rainbow kirby

Some people *do* know at that age, and do feel ready to come out very young. By appearing on the Late Late Show, she's sharing her experience and hoping to educate others.

TylerIE

smyths wrote: »

that girl on late late sayin she knew since she was 12 and wore a 'nobody knows I'm a lesi' tshirt to school the next day what a load of bull. u don't know your arse from your elbow at that age she almost to gay to function and she had that stereotypical lesbonic look, who Is she helping exactly?

rant over

I think for the many people who still are of the "lifestyle choice" or "someone fiddled with ya" mindset she likely helped plant the seed that "ya'know maybe these people don't choose to be like that".

Furthermore her praise for her school may cause teachers to reflect on how they handle LGBT issues - I'm sure many of us know kids who had to change school.

And while I'm in no way "demonstratively gay" I think her "nobody knows" tee really gives a message of "it's your problem, not
mine", and for some people that is a functional way of dealing with coming out....

phic

I'll be watching this, very glad to see RTE putting it on. Might make my parents watch it, as a bit of a warm up to coming out to them!

Fair play to the two people who appeared on the Late Late, it's not easy to represent a whole community to everyones liking. I think they did a good job!

Boston

smyths wrote: »

that girl on late late sayin she knew since she was 12 and wore a 'nobody knows I'm a lesi' tshirt to school the next day what a load of bull. u don't know your arse from your elbow at that age she almost to gay to function and she had that stereotypical lesbonic look, who Is she helping exactly?

rant over

She's stereotypically gay but also not gay because she's 12? As shocking as this may sound, at age 12 I was developing a definite sexuality. I hadn't thought about boys serious, but I was very interested in a woman's, breasts, lips, skin, smile, hair, smell, legs etc. Why wouldn't a girl develop such feelings at the same age or younger.

cooltown

I am nearly an 18 year old guy. I haven't come out yet.
My father is really homopobic. I hope if this is turned on he moght watch it and he might understand how hard it it for gay peple growing up.
I know now that he prob go on a rant about them being dirty and wrong. etc. I think it's so funny because he always blames the parent's. He think's there bad because they made there kids this war. So I suppose he's a bad parent.!

dickdick25

I'm kind of worried about this show being aired. I was at this gay prom thing in the mansion house in september 2008 and when we bought the tickets the website advised not to worry bout being filmed as the filming would be done in a seperate section.

I only discovered half was through the event that the whole thing was being recorded. I was really annoyed with the organisers that they had misled people regarding this. I spoke to one of the organisers and we were moved tables nevertheless the camera was all over the place. I was even more annoyed with the girl with the camera who knew we didn't want to be filmed and just kept walking around our table smiling while recording.

I don't want family work etc knowing I'm gay so really don't want to see myself popping up on this show.

Does n e one know if the mansion house recording of the gay prom made the final cut and if so is it just the six people the show was following that will be shown? I would really appreciate if someone could let me know about this and put my mind at ease for the next week or so!

Heebie

He might not be a bad father.. rather a man with flaws like everyone has flaws.

Does he love you? Do you feel he's given you good advice? Do you feel he's protected you & helped you learn to protect yourself?

There are a million things that are part of "how good" a father he's been to you.. try not to look at only one little piece of who he is.

My Dad had a very bad moment when I was maybe 12 or 13 and told me "If I ever find out you're gay, I'll throw you out of the house."
Now.. he'd written in his journal several years before "I think Todd might be gay." so he'd had plenty of time to be used to the idea.. but still, in what was probably a weak moment for him, said something that terrified me for several years before I was outed to my parents. It was an awful pain to carry around thinking that I'd get thrown out of the house.
I was lucky and it didn't happen. My Dad handled it much better than my Mom when I was outed. Since then he's offered an apology but to this day says he doesn't recall telling me he'd throw me out of the house.

I hope, when you choose to come out, that your father's attitude changes, and that he realises just how much hurt he may have caused you by acting that way. It can take a LONG time for some parents to adjust.

I hope yours adjust quickly when you decide it's time!

Sorry all if this is a bit off-topic.

cooltown wrote: »

I am nearly an 18 year old guy. I haven't come out yet.
My father is really homopobic. I hope if this is turned on he moght watch it and he might understand how hard it it for gay peple growing up.
I know now that he prob go on a rant about them being dirty and wrong. etc. I think it's so funny because he always blames the parent's. He think's there bad because they made there kids this war. So I suppose he's a bad parent.!

cooltown

dickdick25 wrote: »

.I.Does n e one know if the mansion house recording of the gay prom made the final cut and if so is it just the six people the show was following that will be shown? I would really appreciate if someone could let me know about this and put my mind at ease for the next week or so!

Ok!
From what I know it's about six GLBT teens growing up. It focus on there coming out experience at school and in the home. It focuses on good and bad coming out experience, They also interview the peoples parents and how they found it.
So I would say that you should be safe!

cooltown

I think my father loves me but he doesn't understand being gay. He is nearly 61 and he was brought up in a different world. He is a very religous man and he has a bad opinion of gay people. He once told one of his friends that all of those f*gs should be shot. SO I think he loves me but as a straight guy.

Annasopra

cooltown wrote: »

I think my father loves me but he doesn't understand being gay. He is nearly 61 and he was brought up in a different world. He is a very religous man and he has a bad opinion of gay people. He once told one of his friends that all of those f*gs should be shot. SO I think he loves me but as a straight guy.

Well, Your father can change over time, in 1993 an Irish politician went on the late late show and said gay people should be hung - he now supports his gay son and is very friendly and warm towards his sons partner

CTLFilms

Hi there,
Don't worry - you won't be shown. I'm the woman who was filming that day. I'm going to private message you my contact details now and can put your mind at ease.
Thanks

anotherlostie

I didn't see the LLS interview, just their introduction at the start so don't shoot me if my concerns were allayed during the show. The one thing that struck me was, well, how gay they were. I wonder if some of the other 4 being followed will be less stereotypical.

I make this point because a lot of gay people are far from this stereotype, and I hope the documentary doesn't give confused kids watching the notion that this is what all out gay people must be like, potentially forcing them to continue denying their sexuality if they're not comfortable with that idea. I suppose most of the 'under the radar' (not in the closet, but not shouting about it either) gays would not be confident enough to appear on a show like this at the age of 18. Hell, I still wouldn't be at twice that age:P

Of course if they watched Dónal Óg's interview, they will already know this.

The_Minister

Johnnymcg wrote: »

Well, Your father can change over time, in 1993 an Irish politician went on the late late show and said gay people should be hung - he now supports his gay son and is very friendly and warm towards his sons partner

Who was this now?

Dr. Baltar

This is starting now.

TheReverend

Dr. Baltar wrote: »

This is starting now.

Hate not having RTé

fozzle

I cannot believe the guts of these kids. The lassie in the first half summed up how I felt at their age - it was okay for people to be gay, but for me it was a bad, wrong thing. Smart kid. I don't care if these kids are stereotypically gay or not - to have the courage to o this show is incredibly impressive, most people I know (myself included) didn't have the guts to tell THEMSELVES they were gay at that age, let alone the whole nation!

Fair play.

Michellenman

fozzle wrote: »

I cannot believe the guts of these kids. The lassie in the first half summed up how I felt at their age - it was okay for people to be gay, but for me it was a bad, wrong thing. Smart kid. I don't care if these kids are stereotypically gay or not - to have the courage to o this show is incredibly impressive, most people I know (myself included) didn't have the guts to tell THEMSELVES they were gay at that age, let alone the whole nation!

Fair play.

Took the words right out of my mouth.

kraggy

That Riyadh lad seems very together. Fair play to him. Wish I was as mature at that age.

Freiheit

Just in,I assume it'l be on rte.ie for a while?

rainbow kirby

I hope so, I missed the start of it because I was watching the Liverpool match...

fozzle

Freiheit wrote: »

Just in,I assume it'l be on rte.ie for a while?

Since it's a homebrewed show I'd assume it'll go on the player alright, think they keep shows for 30 days.

fozzle

God, I went to school in Waterford and fully believed that the school the girl on atm is leaving was much more accepting of people than the one I was in. Guess the school is less homophobic on the other side, just like the grass is greener.

kraggy

You can tell the edginess between Riyadh and his Dad. His dad is makin an effort and when he came home with the results, even when his dad was asking the questions, Riyadh would look at his mam when answering. Also, when his dad gave him a hug about the leaving cert. results, it wasn't really reciprocated by Riyadh.

Feel sorry for his dad. To some people it's a shock, whether you deem that to acceptable or not. At least now he appears to be making an effort.

Michellenman

When he was on the late late he was saying that now they have a great relationship. Obviously it's taken some work but it's nice to hear that it's got a happy ending.

Nebit

ok im going to be honest here, fair play to them for doing the show, but yet again full of stereotypes and just unhelpful. it reassures in peoples minds that this is what being gay is like making it harder for others to accept.

fozzle

I don't think so, a lot of lgb people I know are quite stereotypical when they come out first, but become less so over time. I think it's a defensive thing. At the end of the day I think that seeing teens confidently out has to help some people. I mean there's nothing that'll help everyone, but that's life, and if the show helps just one person, well as far as I'm concerned it's done something great. Wish I'd seen it at their age, but then, when I was their age it was still illegal o.O

Boston

I haven't seen the show, so I don't know what stereotypes where on display. But, you have to remember these people are just kids, and they're trying to find themselves. You're young, you've realised your gay, other gay people you know and the media tell you to behave a certain way and dress a certain way, so you do, until you find the real you. Kids mimic what they see. Sitting in town on Saturday I saw all manor of kids mimicing adult behaviour they aspire to, some were even trying on the "drunken fukhead" style.

When I was 13 I wan't stereotypically gay, but I was the stereotypically angry white male.

Ollchailin

Nebit wrote: »

ok im going to be honest here, fair play to them for doing the show, but yet again full of stereotypes and just unhelpful. it reassures in peoples minds that this is what being gay is like making it harder for others to accept.

I thought that too. I've never posted here before but just said I'd see what people who have been/are in a similar situation might think. I'm straight but I'm a teacher (sometimes I think people think that's worse in this country! Damn public servants ) so I was interested to see how the kids' teachers/schools were dealing with it. I think if you're a boy in a mixed school it must be easier, girls for the most part are quite accepting, even if the lads aren't. But I think it's harder for girls in many ways, cos lads slag them off & girls are bitchy. Maybe I'm wrong, just trying to come up with ideas.

As you said though, fair play to them for going on the show.

I often worry about some students, but then again teenagers are such angst-ridden beings that their troubles could be anything & have nothing to do with being gay!!

Nebit

fozzle wrote: »

I don't think so, a lot of lgb people I know are quite stereotypical when they come out first, but become less so over time. I think it's a defensive thing. At the end of the day I think that seeing teens confidently out has to help some people. I mean there's nothing that'll help everyone, but that's life, and if the show helps just one person, well as far as I'm concerned it's done something great. Wish I'd seen it at their age, but then, when I was their age it was still illegal o.O

i disagree with you there, i believe that it keeps alot of people from coming out, it was for these stereotypes that i didnt come out earlier. I wasnt flamboyant, i played sport, i was a lads lad, it is for this that i believed it must be just a phase.
i believe if the show had included at least one person who was not the stereotypical gay/lesbian then it would better benefit those in ireland. After all these people in my opinion are the ones who struggle to come to terms with their sexuality the most. (i also am a student councilor so it is based on those who have come to see me)
I believe had i seen this show before i came out at 20, then i would have further stayed in the closet.
This is of course my opinion.

fozzle

Ollchailin wrote: »

I often worry about some students, but then again teenagers are such angst-ridden beings that their troubles could be anything & have nothing to do with being gay!!

The fact that you worry is a great though, even if it's random angst and nothing to do with sexuality on the students' parts. Kids know which teachers are open and approachable and it helps. Schools have a huge responsibility to support ALL their students and while support for students who racially or religiously different seems to be improving all the time, support for lgb youths seems to be severely lacking. In my old school for instance, when I left 10years ago (from an all girls school) you could invite a guy to the debs or go by yourself, if you arrived with another girl you weren't allowed entry. Four years later a friend of my sis was refused entry 'cos she tried to bring her girlfriend. My cousin tells me that a year ago nothing had changed. That's ridiculous. I think this show should be shown to every school in the country, people HAVE to stop pretending lgb issues are irrelevent to schools.

Gragh, I'm ranting, sorry.

fozzle

Nebit wrote: »

i disagree with you there, i believe that it keeps alot of people from coming out, it was for these stereotypes that i didnt come out earlier. I wasnt flamboyant, i played sport, i was a lads lad, it is for this that i believed it must be just a phase.
i believe if the show had included at least one person who was not the stereotypical gay/lesbian then it would better benefit those in ireland. After all these people in my opinion are the ones who struggle to come to terms with their sexuality the most. (i also am a student councilor so it is based on those who have come to see me)
I believe had i seen this show before i came out at 20, then i would have further stayed in the closet.
This is of course my opinion.

:-) Don't worry, I can see your point, and it's a good one. It would have been nice to have a less stereotypical teen on the show, but I don't know how they decided who would be on it - the teens on the show may have been the only ones who wanted to be on it. Not much the producers could do if that was the case.

gibson

I thought the show was quite interesting firstly hats off to people who took part I wish I had their bravery when I was younger.

I was a little disappointed to see that they seem to focusing on one age group though even some from next week seem around the same age as this weeks. Even still though I thought it was well worth the watch

Nebit

Ollchailin wrote: »

I thought that too. I've never posted here before but just said I'd see what people who have been/are in a similar situation might think. I'm straight but I'm a teacher (sometimes I think people think that's worse in this country! Damn public servants ) so I was interested to see how the kids' teachers/schools were dealing with it. I think if you're a boy in a mixed school it must be easier, girls for the most part are quite accepting, even if the lads aren't. But I think it's harder for girls in many ways, cos lads slag them off & girls are bitchy. Maybe I'm wrong, just trying to come up with ideas.

As you said though, fair play to them for going on the show.

I often worry about some students, but then again teenagers are such angst-ridden beings that their troubles could be anything & have nothing to do with being gay!!

im not sure whether being in a mixed school makes that much of a difference to be honest, i went to a mixed school in mayo, an hour and 10 away from my nearest school which was in fact an all boys school, i chose the mixed for other reasons since i had no reason to think i was gay at that time.
However when i reached 5th year i did know i had strong feelings for persons of the same sex, i wouldnt have dared coming out due to the nature of many rural irish schools, in school discussions on the topic left the class ranting about how wrong it was.
Now since being 'out' when i return to my town or the one i went to school in, people who once went to school with me, reject me and some have even spat at me. Not all however. in fact i only keep in contact with 2 people from my old school who accept me for being gay and they are two men.

Nebit

fozzle wrote: »

:-) Don't worry, I can see your point, and it's a good one. It would have been nice to have a less stereotypical teen on the show, but I don't know how they decided who would be on it - the teens on the show may have been the only ones who wanted to be on it. Not much the producers could do if that was the case.

i agree, i realise this was probably the case.

Ollchailin

fozzle wrote: »

people HAVE to stop pretending lgb issues are irrelevent to schools.

In fairness, people have to stop pretending that lgb issues are irrelevant to ANYONE. We all know gay people, even if you mightn't realise it. Now having said that, accepting & all as I am about my own gay friends, I often feel the whole "them vs us/ you straight people don't get what we go through" vibe, so that can be hard at times. I feel because I'm not gay, I'll never be as big a part of their lives because I'm not out on the scene with them, or because I didn't have to deal with the same issues. I hope the kids on this show don't cut people out of their lives just because they've come out now.

fozzle

Ollchailin wrote: »

In fairness, people have to stop pretending that lgb issues are irrelevant to ANYONE. We all know gay people, even if you mightn't realise it. Now having said that, accepting & all as I am about my own gay friends, I often feel the whole "them vs us/ you straight people don't get what we go through" vibe, so that can be hard at times. I feel because I'm not gay, I'll never be as big a part of their lives because I'm not out on the scene with them, or because I didn't have to deal with the same issues. I hope the kids on this show don't cut people out of their lives just because they've come out now.

Absolutely. It's why I'm still not comfortable with the idea of a Pride Parade tbh, seems like it's segregation. If we're trying to be accepted as "normal" then why point out how we're different? But then, for those differences to be accepted without thought, they must first be conciously accepted, so we need to point out the differences.......feels like a vicious circle to me.
I think right now we're still moving through a period of vast change. There are kid, teens, thinking about and coming to terms with, their sexuality now, who weren't even alive when homosexuality was decriminalised. I think the potential difference between being a gay teen now, and say 15 years ago, is huge. I hope the difference really is as big as that, though I realise many peoples' attitudes won't change that fast.

Damn, rambling again. If I find my point I'll let you know, right now I think I lost it somewhere.....

esposito

fozzle wrote: »

Absolutely. It's why I'm still not comfortable with the idea of a Pride Parade tbh, seems like it's segregation. If we're trying to be accepted as "normal" then why point out how we're different?
QUOTE]

You took the words right out of my mouth.. Totally agree

Dr. Baltar

fozzle wrote: »

Absolutely. It's why I'm still not comfortable with the idea of a Pride Parade tbh, seems like it's segregation. If we're trying to be accepted as "normal" then why point out how we're different?

Someone on this board summed up Pride Parades very well a while ago and it also sums up why I am against them:

Goodshape wrote: »

So it's about "YEAH! We're REALLY REALLY different!! Now treat us the same!!" ?

Jesus.

I really am in two minds about this. A celebration of sexual diversity is fine. Being different is absolutely fine. The implication that being gay makes me somehow *different* by default, in any meaningful way, to the rest of my peers in society is not okay.

I have a private life just like everyone else does. I fall in love and have sex with other adults, just like everyone else does. I don't parade my sexual fetishes around the street, and neither does anyone else I know.

Reflector

Have to say really enjoyed the show,
@Nesbit, I think you are looking at it the wrong way. The kids on the show are to you stereotypes but really they are who they are and because of this they tend to come out earlier than guys who hide behind masculinity. they will probably be better adjusted adults because of this.
I was a guy who played sports and who never could accept himself, I came out at 16 to a few but never really accepted it. That was nearly 15 years ago. This is the start, people need to be educated that gay children need outlets and safe spaces and protection from bullies. I think that leaving cert students should be educated on sexuality. There are plenty of very macho gay guys out there and I reckon one of the big walls for young gay kids is the lack of proper gay role models.