To reconnect or not

desolate sun

Have just turned a certain age and have reconnected with a lot of people from my past.

I was just on facebook and looked up one of my exes. I am friends with a lot of my exes on facebook and that's all there is to it - exes with no chance of ever getting back together and I am happy with that.
The problem with this ex is at the time, he was the biggest love of my life. He broke it off with me and I was devastated. Now this was 10 years ago and I am completely over him. Hand on heart I would never go back with him, because he was wrong for me.

I was really close to his sister and brother and have often thought about them from time to time. I found his sister on FB tonight and was dying to send her a message to ask how she was getting on with her life.

Would it be weird if I sent her a message? It is only to reconnect with her moreso than him. TBH there is so much water under the bridge that I doubt it would be an issue. I suppose I'm paranoid that she would think I wanted to get back with him.
Has anybody been in this situation before?

PS the reason I looked up this ex in the first place was because we were such good friends and I see him more as a friend now.

PK2008

Are you trying to convince us or yourself?:D

Really, I dont see why you shouldnt reconnect, even with your ex. Why not?

Lucyx

go for it, she'll probably be delighted to hear from you.
sure thats what FB is there for

and him too....theres nothing wrong with a hi, how are things?

desolate sun

thanks for the positive replies. I was expecting people to say,"leave the past where it is," or something?
I will send her a quick message then.

amdublin

desolate sun wrote: »

Have just turned a certain age and have reconnected with a lot of people from my past.

I was just on facebook and looked up one of my exes. I am friends with a lot of my exes on facebook and that's all there is to it - exes with no chance of ever getting back together and I am happy with that.
The problem with this ex is at the time, he was the biggest love of my life. He broke it off with me and I was devastated. Now this was 10 years ago and I am completely over him. Hand on heart I would never go back with him, because he was wrong for me.

I was really close to his sister and brother and have often thought about them from time to time. I found his sister on FB tonight and was dying to send her a message to ask how she was getting on with her life.

Would it be weird if I sent her a message? It is only to reconnect with her moreso than him. TBH there is so much water under the bridge that I doubt it would be an issue. I suppose I'm paranoid that she would think I wanted to get back with him.
Has anybody been in this situation before?

PS the reason I looked up this ex in the first place was because we were such good friends and I see him more as a friend now.

I don't think you should.

Facebook creates a weird "reality" where you can reconnect with people from your past.. But you have to remember facebook is not Reality. You would have connected with him/his sister in real life if it was a good idea, you obviously haven't done that for a reason.

IMO don't do it. It IS weird and you will regret as soon as you do it, IMO.

SarahSassy

I dont think you should either... What is there to gain from it? Do you genuinely just want to catch up with her? I would guess there is more to it seeing as you searched for him. No point dredging up the past.

LegacyUser

I wouldnt see a problem with it especially if you were really close with his sister at the time. If she wants to write back, she will. If she doesnt, she won't! Personally I'd have no problem with an ex of my brothers sending me a message like that. Blasts From The Pasts like that can be unexpected and great