Can first love be true love?

reap-a-rat

I said I'd ask over here, as I'm sure there's a wealth of experience on here!!

I never would have thought that you could be lucky enough that your first partner could be your true love until I started going out with my man:)! He's so sweet, I fell in love with him after such a short time, and I was never one to get emotionally attached so quickly!! We get on so well and always have, we can know what the other is thinking, sometimes we'll just burst out into song- the same song- for no apparent reason at the same time, little things like that that just make it feel like we are truly kindred spirits! We have any amount of things in commom, yet we are different enough that we can have a good deep debate every know and then! Its never boring, ever! Watching paint dry would be super fun if it was with him:D! Any time I think of the future, he's there, and I know its the same for him, I'll be talking about my dream house and he'll say, "Oh and WE should have this, that and thother"...

I can see the love in his eyes when he stares at me, and I know I'm just beaming thinking about him as I write this:)! I was looking at pictures of him earlier and it just made me feel warm and fuzzy inside!

I know I'm only 19, and we've been togther almost 21 months, and its both of our first proper relatonship, but I just know its love, true love, I think I've been extraordinarily lucky in finding the ideal man for me !

What has yer exp of first love been??

Weidii

Congradulations on finding someone you really love. Your first love will always be amazing.

Firstly because both partners can throw themselves wrecklessly into it and fall flat-out head over heels in love, due to having not having had any bad experiences making you wary of people in relationships yet.

Secondly because it's a totally new feeling. The novelty of doing/feeling something for the first time will always make it special.

I'm not trying to taint what you're feeling, but I'd advise you to keep an open mind and if things do go downhill, don't be afraid to cut it off, because it is possible to feel like this more than once. Do enjoy yourself and if ye end up together forever, then fair play, but be aware that it is possible to feel like that more than once.

minidazzler

To answer the thread title question, even as a skeptic, I'm sure forst love can be true love, in fact all love, I think is probably true love, I mean, what's fake love?

I don't believe in this whole ONE true love Bull crap, there are 6.7 BILLION people in the world, the chances of there being only one person in there who you could happily spend your life with are slim, the chances of people finding that ONE love, are basically impossible.

So I think there is WAY more than one person for everyone.

I'm not sure if that makes me an optmist or a pessimist actually.

That said, my experience of first love....hmmmm, it's odd, I love what I can't have, it sucks, but it's still true love I am quite sure of that.

Das Kitty

My first love has turned out to be my life partner (if that's what is meant by true love).

I don't remember being quite as mushy as the OP but my friend showed me some letters I wrote to her when I met Mike, and yep I was just as gooey! LOL.

My only advice is that when things get tough try not to feel like things are getting spoiled by the arguments, when you work through problems it brings you to another level that's actually better even though it mightn't feel like it to begin with.

So yes, it can last.

dammitjanet

My first love was my true love. He's my soul mate and I've never known someone else like him. After he met me for the first time he turned to his mate and said "I'm going to marry that girl." We're three years together now, and going as strong as always

metrovelvet

The first one is the only one where it doesnt dawn on you, this could end, or it has to end sometime.

Novella

I think when you fall in love for the first time, you think it just couldn't be possible to ever feel that way about anyone else. It's sort of hard to imagine your life without the person you love because I guess, if you've never experienced a break up of the love variety, it's difficult to comprehend it.

I think it'd be nice if you could just fall in love once and that was it, but for a lot of people, that won't be the case. That's ok too really, it's a learning curve. I do think your first love can be your only love though, sure why not?!

The reason the break up with a first love can be so traumatic (I think) is because you don't exactly think it's ever gonna happen. People tend to become a little more pessimistic and guarded after their first love. It does make subsequent break up's easier though.

longhalloween

First love as true love???

Thats what my ex gf thought....

Assets Model

Das Kitty wrote: »

My first love has turned out to be my life partner (if that's what is meant by true love).


Yeah me too we're together almost nine years and married 7 months ago. I'm 29 now and he's almost 30. So yeah I definitely didn't love previous boyfriends so it can work. I was 20 when we got together and pretty skeptical i defo didn't think my J1 romance would end up being my husband but it's been a laugh and we know each other so well and it's been fun doing things together as we've grown up together. My older sisters were v. skeptical of our relationship for years as we were os young so OP i'd advise you to take things slowly you don't wnat to miss out on 20 something experiences. We only moved in together a year ago as i wanted all the living with flatmates experiences of the 20s and it was somuch funnerwhen we finally did move in together.

ultra noir

i met my first love in my early 20's. it lasted 5 years. i never thought it would end. i though it was true love but obviously he didnt, he gave that love to someone else.

its 3 years now. i have moved on but in my heart i long for him still. i question it all the time. true love cant be one sided. i guess i didnt have what i thought i had.

Linguo

My boyfriend is my soulmate, we met at 19 and have been together 7 years this summer! We have grown so much together and our relationship has just gotten better each year, we love eachother to bits and we both know this is it forever!! It can happen at any age so just enjoy it!!:D

Limerickgal82

My friend married her first love and they r blissfully happy !! so never say never

KillerKity

Ones "first" love isn't necessarily their true love (what ever that means!) All I know is that I met a man when I was 21 and 5 years later, in my eyes, he may as well be the only man in the world

Catari Jaguar

Met my boyf at 19 - together 6 years this June. Love him to bits, gonna get married and have babies and all of that. I still get the schmushy eyes, butterflies and palpitations at times. It's a different love now than to initially; less intense, showy & addictive- more of a steady, comfortable knowing.

We always had a relationship that friends would comment on, saying we were very suited and they could see us going the distance, strangers smiling at us on the street and commenting on how in love we looked *cringe*

Just being on the same wave length as him is a great feeling. We're a total partnership. He is home to me - his smell and hugs. *sigh*

[/soppy]

lil'bug

i'm still with my first love 10 years this december, i was 17 when we first started to go out, he is older than me but that doesn't matter, i'm glad i have him in my life

Wibbs

Yes but only if it lasts.

metrovelvet

Wibbs wrote: »

Yes but only if it lasts.

Which means that romance has no part in it.

I'm going to vote yes!
I'm with my first love 13 years, married 7

Boston

metrovelvet wrote: »

Which means that romance has no part in it.

Why must romance ever end?

metrovelvet

Boston wrote: »

Why must romance ever end?

Because for something to qualify as romantic it has to fail.

Wibbs

metrovelvet wrote: »

Because for something to qualify as romantic it has to fail.

Very "irish/celtic" meloncholic way to look at it , but Id have to say arse to that. I dont think it has to fail to be romantic. Given a choice between falling madly in love at 18 and spending the rest of my life with the person with no major bumps in the road like them leaving and it failing or going through a succession of relationships one more or less "meh" than the next until with an air of desperation and self delusion finding the "one" at 35, I'll take the former ted.

Of the happy and healthy couples Ive known a large proportion were "first love" types. Either stayed together from the start or reconnected years later.

metrovelvet

Wibbs wrote: »

Very "irish/celtic" meloncholic way to look at it , but Id have to say arse to that.

Neh. Too many Bronte novels and french movies.

Asphyxia

Browsing old threads so I'll just give my view

Can first love be true love?

I'm not sure if I believe the theory of 'true love' but I do think that your first love can be the person you spend the rest of your life with. There's nothing saying it can't and I have seen first hand from some of my family that you can be together. Nothing is set in stone, you still have to work hard at the relationship to make it work.

candy-gal1

Yes, might not work but id say 99% of the time its true love tbh

lazygal

No. I know one person who married her first boyfriend and she regrets it. She didn't have enough life experience or time with anyone other than him and consequently regrets meeting him so soon, to the detriment of her marriage.

I'm a totally different person to what I was when I met my first "love" and TBH it wasn't really love, more a emotional high of being with someone for the first time. My sister also broke up with her first love after years of telling us they'd get married.

Fluorescence

Well, my cousin got together with her first ever boyfriend at 16 (almost 17), and the following year they were engaged. She's 21 now and they're still together. I always wonder how that's going to pan out, considering they've never even so much as kissed anyone else, but hey - it's not my business. Maybe their love is "true" (whatever true is supposed to mean ) and will stand the test of time. Maybe they'll divorce after 2 years, sick of the sight of each other or wondering what/who they've missed out on. Who knows? An aunt of mine was married at 19, and had 3 kids by her early 20s. Herself and my uncle are still happily married close to 30 years later. To see them together, you'd know their marriage was no mistake.

The point I'm trying (very badly) to make is that there's no such thing as a one true love. Anybody can fall in love with anybody else - that's not difficult. What really matters is long-term compatibility to keep it growing and developing over the course of a lifetime. If that isn't there it's all too easy for it to fizzle out when the novelty's gone.