Talking to friends

steddyeddy

hey i posted here before about rebuilding my life following abuse i have started seeing a counsoler and am working to get an education, this is all happening at a steady pace.

however over the years i have tended to push people away who get too close to me friends girlfriends ect, im improving in this regard but on eof the worst aspects of abuse is the secrecy involved it basically makes you feel very isolated, i would love nothing better than to sit down and talk to my friends (let them in so to speak) instead of pushing them away.

sometimes i deal with things by drinking to much and i want to accept support from my friends instead of this, drinking too much is how i tend to push people away and it really hurts me to do so, but the thing is if im out on a night i have all this hurt inside me and i find it hard to sit there and pretend alls ok.

i guess im asking the people here if one of their friends said to them listen i come from a abusive house you cant imagine what went on but im seeking help for it, realize that when i drink too much its because im going through a hard time please understand sometimes its too much to carry alone and that drives me to drink/sometimes drugs, how would you react if a friend told you all this? would you understand?

you see im afraid as recently ive realized some of my friends (one or two) abandoned me during hard times.

steddyeddy

just to say im doing this to be closer to some of them aswell their making the effort to try and reach me and it is the decent thing to try and open up to them.

Black Swan

We are all imperfect, and struggle with our shortcomings. An acquaintance may be overwhelmed if you share, but a close friend would not. Friends share. So chill, be patient, build close friendships, and you can then share with them, as they will wish to share with you.

steddyeddy

Blue_Lagoon wrote: »

We are all imperfect, and struggle with our shortcomings. An acquaintance may be overwhelmed if you share, but a close friend would not. Friends share. So chill, be patient, build close friendships, and you can then share with them, as they will wish to share with you.

yes thanks man i would not tell a random acquaintance only a close friend i will work on building friendships and even getting rid of those who only reap the benifits of being around me and getting rid of me when im at my lowest.

i will have to share it all with a close friend so they understand me

hollis12

yes of course tell close friends i had to do the same, if they are good friends theyll be supportive if their not then as you say get rid of them, i did the same and havent looked back.