NEED ADVISE

LegacyUser

HI,

I am looking for some advise from Gay maybe BI men in particular. I was just wondering have any of you ever fallin in love or lusted after a female, and had sex with them?? (I am a straight female)

would love to hear from you..

thx

LegacyUser

Sorry I know I wasnt specific...Its just I dont wanta bore you with to much detail, only I am in a weird situation with a very close gay male friend, and sometimes wonder what his intentions with me...long story short...he seems to be attracted to me, and stays over with me, I make sure we do not sleep together...
could he possibly fancy me? or am I imagining this...

sorry cant bring myself to ask...would be way to embarrased...

mobile1601 wrote: »

HI,

I am looking for some advise from Gay maybe BI men in particular. I was just wondering have any of you ever fallin in love or lusted after a female, and had sex with them?? (I am a straight female)

would love to hear from you..

thx

ding-dong

I don't know the specifics of your situation and I'm not exactly an authority on gay/relationship issues - but if you're looking for advice, I would say forget about it. If he's gay he's gay and it's unlikely he's interested in you in that way. It's a bad idea. He probably just likes the emotional intimacy. Maybe he is slightly curious, sexually, but it sounds like something that would end in total disaster. So stop thinking about it!

LegacyUser

ding-dong wrote: »

I don't know the specifics of your situation and I'm not exactly an authority on gay/relationship issues - but if you're looking for advice, I would say forget about it. If he's gay he's gay and it's unlikely he's interested in you in that way. It's a bad idea. He probably just likes the emotional intimacy. Maybe he is slightly curious, sexually, but it sounds like something that would end in total disaster. So stop thinking about it!

Hey, thx for your responce, I know what you are saying, and I thought the same..its just over the last few months we have gotten so close, and he constantly tries to touch and mess with me..and he isnt that kind of guy..because of his actions, I am starting to have feelings to, as its not something I want at all...I do not want to be one of those people who fall for their gay bff...I want to knock this on the head right now. As even if he is sexually curious I dont want to go there, as in my opinion he has had to many sexual partners..and I am not comfortable with that...I should point out he has been with women before, although it was quiet a while back, for the last few years he has been with men......

hopefully it will pass, and I am very flattered that he thinks so much of me, and is even curious with me, it is a compliment in a way...but a head wrecker all the same..

anyway else in this situation before??

irish_dave_83

Well if you like him, just let him sleep with or at least kiss you if he wants that will answer your question. If you dont like him that way don't. It doesn't matter if he fancies you or not.

LegacyUser

Hi there,
I suppose that would be an option, and I do like him, but he is with guys I just cant go there...I guess if it just happened that would be different, but I would not initiate anything. Not sure if I am comfortable with a once off, especially with someone I am really close too..I am a little insecure when it comes to that..Maybe he is just over friendly with me...and I am looking into it to much..not sure yet..

irish_dave_83 wrote: »

Well if you like him, just let him sleep with or at least kiss you if he wants that will answer your question. If you dont like him that way don't. It doesn't matter if he fancies you or not.

ndubz

ding-dong wrote: »

I don't know the specifics of your situation and I'm not exactly an authority on gay/relationship issues - but if you're looking for advice, I would say forget about it. If he's gay he's gay and it's unlikely he's interested in you in that way. It's a bad idea. He probably just likes the emotional intimacy. Maybe he is slightly curious, sexually, but it sounds like something that would end in total disaster. So stop thinking about it!

I wouldn't really listen to all the negative answers to be honest. I myself am a young Bi guy and do have feelings for women also. It just depends on if he likes you that much, im a 20 y.o and although sex and stuff is very important sometimes I can find myself falling for anyone disgregarding their sex if their personality and the chemistry is right. If you want my advice, go for it. Lifes too short.

LegacyUser

ndubz wrote: »

I wouldn't really listen to all the negative answers to be honest. I myself am a young Bi guy and do have feelings for women also. It just depends on if he likes you that much, im a 20 y.o and although sex and stuff is very important sometimes I can find myself falling for anyone disgregarding their sex if their personality and the chemistry is right. If you want my advice, go for it. Lifes too short.

thank you that is really sweet...unfortunetly it all came out this weekend...it started over something business related, then ended in text and email war about our feelings...He said he doesnt feel that way....but has feelings for me...but wont elaborate on this, I have asked him to but he wont..think he may not be sure about everything himself..

feel kinda crap at the moment...dont wanta lose him...I am sorry I said anything now..

Dwn Wth Vwls

It keeps sounding like a worse idea everytime you reveal more. You're clearly uncomfortable with many aspects of it, and none of that will change if you sleep with him. I think it would just jeopardise your friendship and leave you feeling miserable. You should put a stop to the touching and nip it in the bud, otherwise it will probably escalate.

azezil

Dwn Wth Vwls wrote: »

It keeps sounding like a worse idea everytime you reveal more. You're clearly uncomfortable with many aspects of it, and none of that will change if you sleep with him. I think it would just jeopardise your friendship and leave you feeling miserable. You should put a stop to the touching and nip it in the bud, otherwise it will probably escalate.

Agreed.

Speaking as a gay man, I often feel more comfortable around women and at times can get a bit touchy feely, far more so than I do with guys, but I've no sexual desire to be with women.

LegacyUser

azezil wrote: »

Agreed.

Speaking as a gay man, I often feel more comfortable around women and at times can get a bit touchy feely, far more so than I do with guys, but I've no sexual desire to be with women.

Yes I agree with you both, the whole situation is already making me a bit down, and confused...
I kind off asked some indirect questions over the weekend, and it appears he has very strong feelings, which confuse him a little, but he prefers men..I guess I am a little annoyed he stated he was bi up until a few months ago, now he is gay...My female gay friend said he is to blame in this situation, he is very confused about his sexuality, and is given misleading signals....

Anyway I want to also ask, why do some gay men feel more comfortable with females?? and why do you feel the need to touch them, I used to have another gay male friend who was obsessed with his straight friends breasts...and the guy in question in this thread, always wants to touch me....do you think its fair???

LegacyUser

Why does it take so long for the posts and replies to appear here??

LegacyUser

Where is all my posts???

Annasopra

Posts from unregistered users have to be approved by a moderator. We don't always see them

LegacyUser

I would love to hear some feedback on this?...
I had a chat with my friend who said he wasnt confused with his sexuality, he just didnt want to tell me he was gay not bi...very strange???
We had a good chat and he said sorry for confusing me, but he also said he still thinks he may or could still be with a women, but didnt want to give me the wrong idea, and didnt want to hurt me if it wasnt me....seriously what a head wrecker, as it wasnt even me who was flirting and saying all these things in the first place, think he was testing me, now that he knows I could potentially like him, he is backing away...like he heard or got what he wanted.....
I told him he was being very selfish, and we couldnt remain friends, and he asked me to just think about it and not make a big decision like that. But since then he is so distant to me, and has recently got back with his ex...

Anyway I am hoping I can put all this drama behind me its madness..

mobile1026 wrote: »

Yes I agree with you both, the whole situation is already making me a bit down, and confused...
I kind off asked some indirect questions over the weekend, and it appears he has very strong feelings, which confuse him a little, but he prefers men..I guess I am a little annoyed he stated he was bi up until a few months ago, now he is gay...My female gay friend said he is to blame in this situation, he is very confused about his sexuality, and is given misleading signals....

Anyway I want to also ask, why do some gay men feel more comfortable with females?? and why do you feel the need to touch them, I used to have another gay male friend who was obsessed with his straight friends breasts...and the guy in question in this thread, always wants to touch me....do you think its fair???

LegacyUser

Guys,

This may sound really dumb....but how do you get over loving someone you cant have....
anyone been in a simular sitation, any advise PLEASE???

rainbow kirby

mobile1048 wrote: »

Guys,

This may sound really dumb....but how do you get over loving someone you cant have....
anyone been in a simular sitation, any advise PLEASE???

There's no easy answer to this, it's just a matter of trying to get over it and moving on in whatever way you can. It's hard, but unfortunately it's just a fact of life

azezil

mobile1048 wrote: »

Guys,

This may sound really dumb....but how do you get over loving someone you cant have....
anyone been in a simular sitation, any advise PLEASE???

Get under someone else

LegacyUser

azezil wrote: »

Get under someone else

LOL...thanks you made me laugh..:-)