I'm so lonely

LegacyUser

il try and structure this as best i can without losing the run of myself. i am so lonely it hurts. for some reason i feel that having a partner/girlfriend etc will make me happy and maybe it will but right now i feel horrible. i recently broke up with someone as it just wasnt working out and i had to do it. a part of this was that there was someone else i was mad about, who has since turned me down( always the nice guy that no one fancies). as i write this i know it makes me sound like a loser for relationship jumping but thats not the type of person i am but i do know i was crazy about this other person, still am. i also realise that this post about being lonely is just a knee jerk reaction to being rejected but i genuinely dont think it is. although i 'had' someone up until recently i was never truly happy and still not.

it just feels like my life is gone to the dogs and nothing is working out for me. i know people will say go out and meet people etc and join a few clubs but for the next while that isnt really possible, might be every now and again but it wont be a regular thing which, for now, is unavoidable.

i just want to be happy. iv been at the depths of despair before and dragged myself out, it took a long time, and im so afriad of falling back into that. i never ever want to feel like i did then ever again. in a way im scared. what if i never make anything of my life, what if i end up being the person that people say "oh look at x, i cant believe he never married" or whatever. what if i die alone.

i can feel myself on the edge of this pit of despair but im not sure i can stop myself falling in.

help

LegacyUser

Aw, poor you. Genuinely. This is a horrible way to feel, and I am sure that so many people reading your post will identify in some way. I think that a lot of people are lonely but there seems to be a big stigma attached to admitting it.

I'm not sure what to suggest- you seem to think that this is your life for the next little while. Only you can be sure of that. All I know is that when I've felt lonely or sad or hopeless, I allow myself to wallow for a while and then drag myself up by the hair and force myself to change something. Maybe it is time to do a course in something that will make you happy whether that's a course in cooking, photography, or a degree. I don't know. I just wanted to tell you that you aren't alone and certainly not the only one who's ever felt like this.

nicegirl

I agree with Liz above, you poor thing. Everyone is finding it hard at the moment with the state the country is in, but relationship difficulties make it all even harder. <mod snip> Here is a smile for ya

6th

nicegirl please read the announcement at the top of the forum: http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/announcement.php?f=127

nicegirl

I will, sorry about that

LegacyUser

Hi OP here,
after reading this topic over a few times after i read it i realised i need to help myself. no one else is going to do it. iv just sent off an email about organising some counselling. took me a while to send it i admit. think im just scared or worried or something. im not even sure how things work at counselling sessions. can anyone give me a heads up on what to expect?

nicegirl

lonelyman wrote: »

Hi OP here,
after reading this topic over a few times after i read it i realised i need to help myself. no one else is going to do it. iv just sent off an email about organising some counselling. took me a while to send it i admit. think im just scared or worried or something. im not even sure how things work at counselling sessions. can anyone give me a heads up on what to expect?

OP, you sound really down about the whole thing alright, and my heart goes out to you. Loneliness is not pleasant at all. Regarding counselling, I think this might be a good move. I got counselling in the past, and found it really helpful, particularly if someone is going through a hard time. Have a few sessions, get everything off your chest, and you will feel better. I hope you will be ok, and things work out for you