What happened?

LegacyUser

Ok in a bit of a mess the morning and hoping you guys can help me maybe just get things straight in my head. Myself and the g/f are going out about 9 months, both in our mid 20's.. both from the same town. I've just started a 4 month contract in Dublin while shes still here. We never have been a close couple.. I do like her alot, tried to do romantic things etc but respected her space, while shes always came accross as a bit more casual about things. The g/f is normally quite enough, you'd nearly describe her as shy, relaxed but very attractive. We've had a few fights along the line but nothing too major.
Anyways had a belated valentines weekend last week and she came up and everything went really well. It came to her going though and got no "thank you", "had a nice weekend" or anything. I came home this week and went out with the lads to watch the rugby, she couldnt come in but texting away we both knew we'd be out later. About 9 she told me she'd be in this particular pub with her friend, made it in about 10 to a pub across the road and texted her to let her know.
This is were it gets strange.. she just replied Meet in nightclub? This didnt open for another 2hrs and was a bit surprised cause I thought she'd want to see me or invite me over but I let it slide. Made it to the club and was dancing with a mate and she comes up behind me, throws her arms around me and just goes laughing "i see ya looking at other women" and just walks off. I go to follow her but shes away with a friend so I go out to the smoking area to find the lads.
She arrives out 10 minutes later and almost straight away pulls the phone out of my back pocket and starts going through my texts in frount of everyone. I just go "get a load of this!" to everyone and her friend really aggressively goes "theres nothing wrong with what shes doing!" I say something about you wouldnt like your boyfriend doing that without your permission and she immeadiately goes off one.. saying i know nothing about her relationship and calling me and as/hole etc. Anyways she dragged the g/f away (who wasn't getting involved and told me sort it out amungst youselves) saying "lets go on the pull" and then "i want to go, you can come back" and i just said to the g/f "dunno what happened there but take your time and i'll be here, come find me.
Now this is what really hurt me. About an hour later did a lap of the club and there she was chatting to a fella and there was hands all each other. Went straight up to them, shook his hand but he disappeared quickly. Asked the g/f what was going on and she just said a friend of her brother (but she didnt know his name) and told me that she "couldnt be dealing with me right now", i said fine and walked off. Anyways for the rest of the night her and the friend where hanging around with this group of lads and were all over each other, dirty dancing etc. Saw them drinking shots at a bar with 2 other fellas looking very cozy and she was spotted in a booth on her own with another fella later on. Anyways couldnt take anymore watching this, told her this wasnt on, its off and went home.
Not been able to sleep rang her about 4.30, no answer, rang the friends mobile on private no and got through to her that way. Fella answered, still around town, could hear lads in the backgound and she basically hung up when i said what i said above and that its crappy when we hardly ever see each other that she wouldnt give me 2min of her time. Sent a few crappy texts but still no reply from her. She never at any point mentioned being pissed off or upset by anything I did, just had a "and whats your problem" attitude.
Ok I completely understand her wanting to break up with me but like I say things seemed fine and she was really out to upset me last night. I know she'd freak if she saw me upto the the things she was doing and basically how can I trust her if this is how she is when I'm there and things are ok. I cant stop thinking that she spent the night with one of these guys. I dont want to be with someone like that and I've deleted her off facebook and number from my phone. Sorry for the long post but like I say it has me fairly messed up and please I'd love to know how could somebody change so suddenly like this!?

krudler

Sounds like she wanted to break up but wanted you to break up with her first so she didnt have to do it so acted like that probably telling her friends she thought you were cheating or something, she sounds like a complete bitch to be honest, you're better off being rid of her

Amazotheamazing

I dunno, I've seen this a few times (only with women for some reason) where the girlfirend's best friend makes a massive effort to break up the relationship, that's what that night sounds like to me. With you out of the way in Dublin, the best friend who doesn't like you is pretty much dominating your girlfriend's time. Could be way off, but you need to speak to her sober.

LegacyUser

It's hard when something like that happens. A real wtf moment.

You gave her every chance to let you know what was on her mind, and she threw everyone of them back in your face. You're not her shrink, it's not up to you to try and decipher what's going on in her head. She doesn't deserve any more of your care, consideration or time. Forget about her and find someone who knows how to be in an adult relationship