Sister trying to get into another woman's man.

LegacyUser

I’ve just had a call from my sister who has started a new job in recent weeks. She called to tell me she’s put her eye on a bloke in work. Apparently it’s full-on infatuation, she’s mad about this bloke and is dying to get something started with him. She reckons she knows for certain that he likes her too. The problem is that he has a live-in girlfriend.

She doesn’t know how long they’ve been together but intends to do a bit of investigating on that score and seems hell-bent on sticking her oar into this couples relationship. To be honest I find her attitude sickening. It’s so sleazy and selfish.

The problem for me is that, while I’d love to tell my sister what I think of her antics, we have had quite a volatile relationship, especially of late, and I love her and don’t want our own relationship to be adversely affected by anything I say or feel, but I am pissed off enough to want to say something here. How could I word my opinions without causing offence? Thanks in advance.

Emme

I'd say nothing even though it isn't the ideal start to a relationship. It's her own business what she does and she mightn't get anywhere anyway. If your relationship is volatile she probably wouldn't listen to you and anything you say would be a red rag to a bull.

Peggypeg

:eek::(:mad: Wow OP, that really is sickening and sleazy. I have a sister myself and I know I would be just as disgusted if she told me what yours has told you. I don't know what you should do really, it all depends on whether you think she'd listen to you or care what you think? I know if it was myself and I felt I couldn't talk to my sister, I would tell our mother and ask her to talk to her. Would that be a possibility? Big HUG to you, it can't be easy to see your sister acting that way.

Quazzie

If it was me I'd ask myself if I wanted a relationship with a family member where I am constantly on my toes about what I say or do. I wouldn't want a friend like that so why should I pretend that my family acting like that is any better.

She is your sister today and she'll still be your sister tomorrow. I'd tell her how I feel regardless of reprocussions, simply because she deseves to know how immature she is being. She might fall out with you now, but someday she will eb mature enough to look back and thank you for it. Never jeopardise who you are as a person to make a lesser person feel better.

LegacyUser

Thanks for the responses. I guess I'm just kinda stunned. When I said to her on the phone, 'and what about the girlfriend? If they're living together they're obviously serious, not matter long they're together. How long are they together anyway?' She just said to me, 'Oh her, I dont know but I'll be making it my business to find out. I just wish she'd get run over by an articulated fcuking truck'.

I was like WTF!!!!! Sorry to be so blunt but I just didn't actually know until today that my sister could be such a selfish heartless <snip> when it comes to getting her claws into a man. Hopefully she's setting herself up for a fall here. Might be the best thing for her.

LegacyUser

my sister has no morals at all, she slept with my brother in law because she felt sad and then decided to cry rape and i found out she was lying and she dropped the charges, you cant help who your family are but you can choose your friends, but in responce to the op, tell your sister to grow up, needless to say ive never spoken to my sister since, girls like her make me sick

mood

Sorry but your sister sounds horrible. I don't understand how anyone can think/behave like this.

I really hope he knocks her back swiftly and bluntly.

Apart from being a horrible person she is also foolishly risking having a bad atmosphere in work and ruining her reputation in work.

LegacyUser

You have a bad relationship but you have to tell her that behavior is not on, its selfish and immature. If my sister said that to me, I wouldn tell her flat out how disgusting her remarks are, especially the comment about the girlfriend being hit by a truck.

Has she done things like this before?

Wagon

Id be completely honest with her and tell your exact opinion of her. It wont do any good, but you can at least use the oppurtunity to try and change her mind. your man should knock her back good and solid. Hopefully he does.

Emme

I don't have sisters myself and often wished for one, but I don't envy the OP her sister. It's hard to know what the OP should do because if she says something to her sister it's not going to make any difference. Maybe say to her "I don't like what you're doing but you'll probably do what you like anyway and if you get knocked back it will be your own doing". The OP's sister doesn't sound like one to take advice and hopefully the guy in question is decent and will tell her where to go.

LegacyUser

guest2323 wrote: »

Has she done things like this before?

Not that I'm aware of, but she possibly has because I remember when my own partner started a new job a few years back with a high female to male ratio my sister went on and on about how I'd want to 'look out' for other women trying to get into him and all this. I thought she was just being overly paranoid for my sake, but now I'm coming round to the idea that she just reckons the whole female population thinks like she does!

We've spoken again and I've told her I reckon she's letting herself in for a whole lot of hurt here. Of course she is not interested in hearing this. I guess the only thing to do here is sit back and watch the fireworks. I'll update this thread if there are any dramatic developments.