Keep cutting myself off from those around

lcrcboy

I was wondering can anyone give me advice on this situation, basically I seem to keep putting up a boundary from those around me that I dont know well and its gotten to the point where its messing with my work life, social life and college life. Most of my younger years I spent moving from country to country so never really got the chance to make good friends and then my family decide to move back to Ireland, I tried in 1st year and 2nd year of school to be myself but found I was getting bullied for stupid things like being called a swat or a loner with a funny accent, so very quickly I started to try and fit in by messing in class and then I got mad and started to crack on anyone that would give me cheek it got so bad I couldent tell the difference between people actually slagging me and people only making a few harmless jokes, I got into the wrong crowd in my first year of college and spent my time drinking,smoking looking for fights ect ect. Any good friends I made backstabbed me in a major way from stealing money from me to trying to get me jumped so I dont really trust many people. now Im repeating 1st year, repeating hit me so hard I wanted to change my ways so I stopped hanging around with that crowd but now Im alone with maybe 1 other good best friend but Im getting sick of it I want to do like every one else is and live a normal life doing normal things.

At work people have tried to get freindly with me but I keep cutting them off not talking for long periods when they try, leaving the situation uncomfterble A few times I have overheard people saying Im strange, to quiet, somthing has to be wrong with me. I just want to fit in for once, I have got invited to work partys but its always the same guy there who invites me and its never the actual persons party who invites me so Im pretty shure they dont want to see me around. I went to one party a few weeks ago and made a total balls of myself going off on a rant about how life is so much easer for them, now I feel like I cant even drink that much without going mental. A few girls have tried to get close to me aswell but again I just cut myself off I get tense.

I may sound like a complete prick but I really want to change my ways so please if anyone has good advice please help Ill listean

ps Im trying to take up sports and stuff to give me something to do but any other advice would be great:(:(

lcrcboy

just on another note their I have a bit of a reputation from school for my reckless behavour which seems to follow me around anyone who has heard of me has heard of me genrally in a bad way so I need to find a way so strip that

Piriz

hey dude,
i reckon you need to chill out, work on your self esteem, let life slow down a bit. People you know now you might not know in two years time so don't worry too much about anyones negative opinions of you. It sounds like you need to find yourself a bit, as in put across the real you to other people, maybe you need to mature, and you will, your in the process of it right now by the sounds of it, just don't try to be anything just be you and be humble if you can. When you are just yourself its easier to make & sustain friendships. (to help make this more clear, you dont need to be seen as the tough guy, the fun guy, the smart guy the anything, just be you and be friendly). Concentrate on your studies!! Forget about your younger years, lots of people regret the way they behaved when they were young.
Don't try too hard with people, just work on becoming humble!
Humble, positive, confident.....think of these words every day!!!!
good luck!

lcrcboy

Piriz wrote: »

hey dude,
i reckon you need to chill out, work on your self esteem, let life slow down a bit. People you know now you might not know in two years time so don't worry too much about anyones negative opinions of you. It sounds like you need to find yourself a bit, as in put across the real you to other people, maybe you need to mature, and you will, your in the process of it right now by the sounds of it, just don't try to be anything just be you and be humble if you can. When you are just yourself its easier to make & sustain friendships. (to help make this more clear, you dont need to be seen as the tough guy, the fun guy, the smart guy the anything, just be you and be friendly). Concentrate on your studies!! Forget about your younger years, lots of people regret the way they behaved when they were young.
Don't try too hard with people, just work on becoming humble!
Humble, positive, confident.....think of these words every day!!!!
good luck!

cheers man what you said kind of put things into prospective, I think I needed to hear something like that:cool::cool: