Rugby Newsflash !! Ireland V's France ......!

dak

The French rugby team practice was delayed nearly two hours today after a player reported finding an unknown white powdery substance on the practice field.

Head coach Marc Lièvremont immediately suspended practice while police and federal investigators were called to investigate. After a complete analysis, investigating forensic experts determined that the white substance unknown to players was the try line. Practice was resumed after special agents decided the team was unlikely to encounter the substance again.

dak

A traffic policeman stopped a drunken driver and asked him to blow into the bag. The driver promptly handed him a card which said: ASTHMATIC: DON'T TAKE BREATH SAMPLES.

The policeman said in that case, he would take a blood sample, whereupon the driver handed over another card which read: HAEMOPHILIAC: DON'T TAKE BLOOD SAMPLES.

By this time the policeman was getting somewhat annoyed, so he demanded a urine sample. The driver produced a third card which read: DEWSBURY MOOR RFC: SUPPORTERS CLUB: DON'T TAKE THE PISS.

Iwasfrozen

dak wrote: »

The French rugby team practice was delayed nearly two hours today after a player reported finding an unknown white powdery substance on the practice field.

Head coach Marc Lièvremont immediately suspended practice while police and federal investigators were called to investigate. After a complete analysis, investigating forensic experts determined that the white substance unknown to players was the try line. Practice was resumed after special agents decided the team was unlikely to encounter the substance again.

Federal Investigators ? Neither Ireland or France is a Federation. Could you explain this please ?

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Iwasfrozen wrote: »

Federal Investigators ? Neither Ireland or France is a Federation. Could you explain this please ?

Tis a joke. Jokes are not known for their accuracy.:D

Iwasfrozen

Ikky Poo2 wrote: »

Tis a joke. Jokes are not known for their accuracy.:D

No, I wouldn't ask it just seems to me that a certain OP, copy and pasted a joke from somewhere else and then changed the headline.

dak

Iwasfrozen wrote: »

No, I wouldn't ask it just seems to me that a certain OP, copy and pasted a joke from somewhere else and then changed the headline.

Still counts as a joke ! And for the record the governing bodies of Rugby are known as federations and hence the federal investigation ( Nothing to do with politics)

Iwasfrozen

dak wrote: »

Still counts as a joke ! And for the record the governing bodies of Rugby are known as federations and hence the federal investigation ( Nothing to do with politics)

True, but I assumed they weren't related to the Rugby officials as the Rugby officials wouldn't have to investigate what a try line is.

dak

Iwasfrozen wrote: »

True, but I assumed they weren't related to the Rugby officials as the Rugby officials wouldn't have to investigate what a try line is.

Oh I try ! They weren't investigating what the try line was ! Its a joke suggesting that the white powder was drugs , hence the investigation, hence the clear up when they found it was a try line , something they are not likely to see again ! Hope you get it now.. try not to take it all literally !

Pompey Magnus

Iwasfrozen wrote: »

True, but I assumed they weren't related to the Rugby officials as the Rugby officials wouldn't have to investigate what a try line is.

Dig up!

patmac

Iwasfrozen wrote: »

Federal Investigators ? Neither Ireland or France is a Federation. Could you explain this please ?

Good way to ruin a joke right there.

who the fug

Sure there was a Time Team special on that joke

deisedevil

Iwasfrozen wrote: »

True, but I assumed they weren't related to the Rugby officials as the Rugby officials wouldn't have to investigate what a try line is.

Your name suits you. You could do with warming up a bit!

dak

On a tour of New Zealand, the Pope took a few days off to visit the coast for some sightseeing. He was cruising along the beach in the Pope-mobile when there was a frantic commotion just off shore. A helpless man, wearing a France rugby shirt, was struggling frantically to free himself from the jaws of a 25 foot shark.

As the Pope watched in horror, a speedboat pulled up with three men wearing Ireland rugby shirts. One quickly fired a harpoon into the shark's side while the other two reached out and pulled the blue semiconscious Frog from the water.

Then using the long clubs, the three beat the shark to death and hauled it into the boat. Immediately the Pope shouted and summoned them to him. "I give you my blessing for your brave actions.

I heard that there were some bitter hatred between the French and the Irish , but now I have seen with my own eyes that this is not true."

As the Pope drove off, the harpooner asked his pals, "Who was that?" "It was the Pope" one replied. "He is in direct contact with God and has access to all of God's wisdom."

"Well" the harpooner said, "he may have access to God and his wisdom, but he doesn't know anything about shark fishing. Is the bait holding up OK or do we need to get another one?"

recylingbin

dak wrote: »

The Irish rugby team practice was delayed nearly two hours today after a player reported finding an unknown white powdery substance on the practice field.

Head coach Declan Kidney immediately suspended practice while police and federal investigators were called to investigate. After a complete analysis, investigating forensic experts determined that the white substance unknown to players was the try line. Practice was resumed after special agents decided the team was unlikely to encounter the substance again.

Made your joke more believable

dak

recylingbin wrote: »

Made your joke more believable

After Saturdays performance I'd have to agree !