Ol' No. 23 Wagon's extremely experimental home brew

Wagon

Got an iBrew for christmas from some mates (see above) They gave it to me because im an alcoholic. It was the best present i ever got. It's got everything you need, even a condom (bottom right of the photo) so you can ride your beer when you're lonely without contaminating it. Currently brewing some lager and am waiting for 20 pints of it to be ready in the next week and a half so i can get drunk and argue with the dog about politics again.

Was curious to know does anyone know any intereting ingredients i could add to it? (take off the condom wagon - har bleedin' har) provided the first batch doesn't kill me, i plan to make another and keep arguing with the dog but maybe with different flavoured vomit the next day. I'll take all ideas into consideration.

AckwelFoley

The condom i presume is to goad you.

I feel that home brew kit has all the halmarks qualities of a contraption that may create a beer high in brewers droop.

That been said, id rather be drunk and happy, than sober and horney

Whispered

you can't be drunk and horney?

Wagon

snyper wrote: »

The condom i presume is to goad you.

I don't plan to make love to my dog but i will need something to stir the brew with. So yes.

I feel that home brew kit has all the halmarks qualities of a contraption that may create a beer high in brewers droop.

That's not a worry.

That been said, id rather be drunk and happy, than sober and horney

I agree. The whole thing is a big contraception.

helena.ryan wrote: »

you can't be drunk and horney?

Yes but in my case, i stop caring about getting a shag and get lazier around women when i drunk. I'm the same when sober really so drooping isn't really a big problem for me. That said, i do have a substantial langer.

pickarooney

No longer a student and a while of being an oul' lad, I miss the days of home-brewage.

Wagon

Wagon wrote: »

That said, i do have a substantial lager.

fyp

Wagon

Deleted User wrote: »

fyp

Sexy

So seriusly lads, i didn't want to go to a forum full of actual brewers who go on about the "texture" and the "feel". I came here because it's got real drinkers who go on about the carnage of the night before and the 30 second, 3 octave farts that kill any flies around the bowl. so what should i add? Grass? Vodka? its experimental. and if you do it right, it might cause women to lose their clothes.

P.C.

Wagon wrote: »

Sexy

So seriusly lads, i didn't want to go to a forum full of actual brewers who go on about the "texture" and the "feel". I came here because it's got real drinkers who go on about the carnage of the night before and the 30 second, 3 octave farts that kill any flies around the bowl. so what should i add? Grass? Vodka? its experimental. and if you do it right, it might cause women to lose their clothes.

First things first - you still have about a week before this brew is ready.

When it is, drink it, and let us know how it is.

I would suggest caramel for the next brew - not too much.
It will make the beer slightly darker, and give it a slightly sweeter taste.

Wagon

P.C. wrote: »

First things first - you still have about a week before this brew is ready.

When it is, drink it, and let us know how it is.

It'll be ready tomorrow.

I would suggest caramel for the next brew - not too much.
It will make the beer slightly darker, and give it a slightly sweeter taste.

Sweet. Is it just caramel you can buy in a shop and just add it to be beer during fermentation?

Wagon

Beer is done. Tastes like arse but still, Wagon 1 - Diago 0.