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Should I give up?

  • 27-12-2009 12:38pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Me & ex split a year ago. Was very bitter split with court dates for access over kids.

    Over Christmas I decided to let him spend the day with us as I felt it would be good for kids and us. I felt there are a lot of unresolved issues. It went well.

    I also felt he still had feelings though he has not acted on them. Now i'm wondering is he giving me mixed messages so he can play happy families without the committment of a relationship. Or is he testing the water to see if he wants to come back.

    I have asked him has he moved on and he wont answer. I have asked if there is someone else and again no answer. Is he afraid to answer coz if he says he has moved on I'm not gonna be happy or is it because he doesnt know himself.

    I have told him I love him but he shakes his head like he doesnt believe me.

    I wish I knew what was going on in his head. What I do know is that if he had moved on, he would be fairly quick in telling me. I also know there is nobody else significant,(**** buddy possibe though) I'm in touch with his family

    I'm finding it fairly impossible to move on. He does continally ask about my welfare in a round about way


Comments

  • #2
    Kevster
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,980 ✭✭✭Kevster


    It'd be impossible for any of us here to say with accuracy what is going on inside his head. However, I am looking firectly at you and telling you to get things in motion and request of him to havea meeting with you to discuss the future. You shouldn't wait around wondering what he wants, when you could just as easily talk together to discuss things. Communication is vital in every walk of life, and if you cannot speak to him now, then what does that tell you about the future? When you want to find out something, don't waste any time in finding out.

    Request to have a meeting with him at a designated place and time, and at this meeting, you need to both outline what you both want for the future; and to LISTEN to each other's aspirations with understanding and open eyes.

    Kevin


  • #3
    St James
    Closed Accounts Posts: 76 ✭✭St James


    you love him, but does he love you?

    why did ye split up? no need to answer this on this BB, but if you were the person who organised the split up, why should he trust you again? if he organised, were there problems that you could resolve? if so, have you resolved them and have you told him so.

    if the problem was at his end and the problem remains, then you need to move on. Your kids will always have a relationship with him, but you wont.


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