Ignorant pain in the ass - bit of help

peabutler

I know a lad who has been involved in an activity for 8 years and himself and I have always enjoyed it up until recently. A long term club member got a good few new lads to join up including one absolute idiot who we'll call John. Now John straight away started giving a few of the older members hassle, we all took it as a bit of banter.

Over the next few weeks he kept at us trying to get laughs from the others. We began to get annoyed and told him where to go but he kept on. He had the backing of most people because they saw it as a laugh. Most of us shrugged it off but my friend who is a bit more directly involved with this lad through different things has begun to get really unhappy with John. John has even come up to my mate on a night out and told everyone willing to listen that my mate was up for Sexual Assault ( harmless enough but in a small-ish town can cause big issues)

At that stage we thought my friend might hit him but this guy is small and hitting/fighting him would only lead to a lot worse trouble down the road. It has got to a stage were my mate does not want to socialise from fear of embaressment. I'd appreciate if anybody would be willing to help us in ways to get this Ignorant pain in the ass of our backs.

renko

You need to find out as much about the 'pain in the ass' as possible - where he lives, who he's gone out with, work colleagues, total history and current habits. I've known people like this before, and generally they have pissed off plenty of people before you meet them.

Even if he's not embarrased about his past, at least the others in your group will know his true character.

Tell you're mate to get out and don't give in (I know it's easy for me to type), but he needs to find a way to laugh in this guys face even if he has to practice a nonchalant response - seriously.

peabutler

I know what you are saying and I myself had a long chat with a lad who used to play football with him, this lad reckons you try talk to your man he is a natural for back answering and unless you are careful he could make a fool out of you. Don't want myself or especially my friedn made look even worse. Your man is always in a crowd. He always has someone to laugh even if he says the stupidest thing imaginable.

renko

Yeah, I know the type. But talking to his footy buddy (and others) is what I'm saying. See, you learned something about him even if only that he's a 'smart mouth pain in the ass'. Keep that up and spread the word with your mates.

In the end if his talk starts to get out of hand, I suppose you have to consider your options:
1. Deck him (I don't recommend this - more problems and he has the upper hand)
2. Call him on it straight up - this takes guts, especially in a crowd, and he'll probably come back with a wise crack to try and make it look as if you're overeacting. But it will make the point.
3. Talk worse **** about him.

I'm actually getting het up now, because I know (and detest) people like this.

peabutler

Aye, I'm trying to think up some ideas but you do make some great helpful points. I happen to know something really personal about a member of his family but do't really want to say that to him in front of a crowd because it goes farther than random insults.

Silverfish

Just a reminder, do not advocate violence on this forum. Thank you.


Op, have you tried separating him from his crowd and telling him that his behaviour and his lies are not appreciated, and that you know enough stuff about him that you don't even have to bother making stuff up.

I'd start with that.

renko

Silverfish wrote: »

Just a reminder, do not advocate violence on this forum. Thank you.

I was pointing out that the violent option is not a good one - but I'll watch my typing Silverfish.

peabutler

Not me personally but the lad who introduced him into the club did. Your amn told all his buddies that he begged him to stop and made it sound really deranged bad. This IMO has become quite extreme.

Wagon

I know this type as well, ****in pain in the arse they are. The only way is to put him in his place. His wise cracks will put you of guard but i think rather than being nice to him (this just doesnt work with people like that), tell him in no uncertain terms that you and your mates aren't taking this crap.

fatjebus

You ever just told him to not bother coming back!

Done and dusted!

I play used to play footy with this absolute MORON! that used to come up every single sat, theres a good 16 of us or so that play, he royally pissed off who he thought to be the quiet person on the field (Of course this quiet guy is just a really nice guy that you don't wanna get on the wrong side of) Lets just say that when the quiet guy had finished with him after a small heart to heart after the game Saturday he wasn't seen at our game again!

I'm not saying you have some quiet (maniac in the hiding) that everyone knows not to **** with and get him to tell him not to bother, just make a united stand and get rid of him, your game will be better for it!

Danniboo

peabutler wrote: »

Aye, I'm trying to think up some ideas but you do make some great helpful points. I happen to know something really personal about a member of his family but do't really want to say that to him in front of a crowd because it goes farther than random insults.

That would be a really low thing to do by dragging his family in to it, I hate people who this, cheap shots at people. To be honest you'll be just as bad as he is if you start shouting his family business around plus what did the family member do on you to deserve to be mouthed about.