Paraprosdokians- "She got her good looks from her father, he's a plastic surgeon".

tech77 · 02-12-2009 1:29am #1

I'll give this another go.
Anyone have any good paraprosdokians?
Groucho Marx used them a lot (i think it's why he was so funny tbh).
Mitch Hedberg seemed to as well.

Basically, wordplay where the second part of the statement changes the entire meaning of the sentence in a humourous way.

Homer Simpson: "If i could just say a few words... i'd be a better public speaker".

Love the Groucho Marx one in the title btw.

dynamopiev · 02-12-2009 1:49am

He's a dark horse isn't he; black beauty

dynamopiev · 02-12-2009 1:50am

he's a hard faced bastard isn't he; the man in the iron mask

Sharpshooter · 02-12-2009 1:51am

Moved From After Hours at OPs request.

OutlawPete · 02-12-2009 1:54am

Sharpshooter wrote: »

Moved From After Hours at OPs request.

*looks around"

I was never on this forum before. I may stay

Here's one ..

"I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my father, not screaming and terrified like his passengers" - Bob Monkhouse

OutlawPete · 02-12-2009 1:56am

Another ..

"You can always count on Americans to do the right thing - after they've tried everything else" - Winston Churchill

tech77 · 02-12-2009 2:12am

"When somebody close to you dies, move seats".
Jimmy Carr.

OutlawPete · 02-12-2009 2:18am

"Where there's a will, I want to be in it."

OutlawPete · 02-12-2009 2:40am

Another Groucho Marx one ..

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it."

tossy · 02-12-2009 4:40am

Youtube stewart francis he is the modern day king of the Paraprosdokian.

OutlawPete · 02-12-2009 4:41am

tossy wrote: »

Youtube stewart francis he is the modern day king of the Paraprosdokian.

Did you not bring a link with you??

Go and get one .. hurry back

folan · 02-12-2009 9:33am

OutlawPete wrote: »

Another Groucho Marx one ..

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it."

Ah, that was mine! now ive to go and try to be clever!

And yet another Groucho Marx one
Outside of a dog, a book is a mans best friend. Inside of a dog, its too dark to read.

marcsignal · 02-12-2009 1:08pm

I'd rather work for a hundred Israeli soldiers for free, than work for 1 Palestinian and be paid 5 grand.

I'm a grave digger :cool:

.

dak · 02-12-2009 1:15pm

Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, you will be a mile away and he won’t have any shoes

youtheman · 02-12-2009 1:54pm

OutlawPete wrote: »

"Where there's a will, I want to be in it."

Where there's a will, there's relations

Hickory Dickory Dock
Three mice ran up a clock
The clock struck one ........
And the other two escaped with minor injuries

marcsignal · 02-12-2009 9:17pm

"I never forget a face, but in your case i'll make an exception"

Groucho Marx

Bearhunter · 02-12-2009 9:53pm

I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my father. Not screaming and terrified like his passengers.

OutlawPete · 02-12-2009 11:17pm

Bearhunter wrote: »

I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my father. Not screaming and terrified like his passengers.

Or another one I like ..

"He was a great reader, for a blind man" - OutlawPete

Just made that up

OutlawPete wrote: »

"I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my father, not screaming and terrified like his passengers" - Bob Monkhouse

Paraprosdokians- "She got her good looks from her father, he's a plastic surgeon".

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