What am I doing wrong?!

mcwilliams

Ok,I'm a fella and I don't mean to be boasting but I've been told many times that I'm very good looking and I notice that girls do look at me.

However,I'm fairly shy and at discos I almost seem to take a back seat when talking to girls(let my friends approach). I was just wondering if any girls had any tips?

cournioni

I'm not a girl, but the thing to do is just go over and talk to them. Doesn't matter what you talk to them about really, just go over to them with a big smile on your face. Have a laugh and a joke with them, even if you're nervous as fcuk, as people say "be cool". Throw in one or two compliments into the mix and you're flying. If she likes you it will show, if she doesn't or she is going out with someone she will walk away. Don't worry about rejection because there is nothing to lose.

mcwilliams

Ok thanks!

Anybody else?

XarcherX

hi OP, you don't say what age you are? it probably wouldn't make a huge difference but still...
Personally, i like guys that can make me laugh and that can laugh at themselves.
The biggest turn off is guys who are too cocky and come on too strong. Would definately prefer someone who's shy rather than full of it. But if you're shy to the point where you don't approach her at all then she'll prob think you're not interested.
Let her know you like her but don't come on too strong.

My 2 cents :-)

mcwilliams

XarcherX wrote: »

hi OP, you don't say what age you are? it probably wouldn't make a huge difference but still...
Personally, i like guys that can make me laugh and that can laugh at themselves.
The biggest turn off is guys who are too cocky and come on too strong. Would definately prefer someone who's shy rather than full of it. But if you're shy to the point where you don't approach her at all then she'll prob think you're not interested.
Let her know you like her but don't come on too strong.

My 2 cents :-)

I'm 16,sorry I didn't mention that. And I understand you,I'm shy but like not with my friends or nothing. Also,I can txt girls for ages and they're well impressed,it's just more when your doing it in person

dblennon

Ok firstly 99.99999% of guys find it dificult to just chat to girls at your age.

but next time you see someone you want to talk to quickly analyse what your feelings are, if you're nervous or afraid etc, you mightn't have had enough experiences at your age to know how to overcome it, but i used to turn it into an adrenLINE rush and i'd enjoy the fear fun aspect of approaching a girl.

remember a rejection is just a failed approach learn from it and try again

midlandsmissus

mcwilliams wrote: »

Ok,I'm a fella and I don't mean to be boasting but I've been told many times that I'm very good looking and I notice that girls do look at me.

However,I'm fairly shy and at discos I almost seem to take a back seat when talking to girls(let my friends approach). I was just wondering if any girls had any tips?

To be honest most guys are like that.
Men are terrified of rejection especially in front of their mates.
Drunk men are a different story:eek:

If I see a guy I like in a club I usually go over to him cause in general men will not make a move unless you hit them over the head and tell them you're interested. The men I've done this with have always said to me later 'Im really glad you came over to me cause Im really shy with girls"!!

Didymus

OP I am a girl and can I recommend the 'eye contact' trick. If you are in a busy place try to make sure she catches your eye, but look away promptly so she doesn't think you're staring her out of it. That will get her attention without adding any pressure. Some time later you could try meeting her eyes again maybe at the bar or walking past her. But it needs to be subtle!

This could build up a bit of chemistry between you before you've even had to open your mouth

And that way when you go up to talk to her you won't be a stranger. And you could say "hello, I've notived you and can't leave a moment like this go by (or whatever you fell comfortable saying!....) "

Good Luck let us know if it works

xstarz 2kaii9x

hey mcwilliams

well im a 16 year old girl nd its so annoying wen lads walk up to u nd act far too cocky!! dre is no bigger turn off!!

u just gotta walk up to any girl u lyk nd be friendly!! just tell a gud joke!! just keep smiling nd jokin away nd ull be sorted!!

but dont tell those terrible cheesey ones lyk knock knock jokes......:)

mcwilliams

Yeah but all my friends are cocky so it looks as if I'm not bothered if ya get me

xstarz 2kaii9x

mcwilliams wrote: »

Yeah but all my friends are cocky so it looks as if I'm not bothered if ya get me

oh well thats another story! if theyre really cocky just concentrate on one of the girls u like nd make sure she notices u over ur 4nd!

if yer all in a group talking ty to get close to da girl u like nd make her talk to u nd nt ur 4nds! if ur 4nds are cocky den shel automatically think ur cocky 2!

Torakx

just remember there is no such thing as failure.
there are only positive and negative results.
i am also extremely shy but i watch people alot.
we all have areas we are more comfortable in.
but one technique i have seen work is having that attitude so that when you get a negative result it isnt so bad because you did not fail! so you carry on until you get a positive result
seems to work for the drunk guys i can only imagine it would work doubly for a sober one hehe