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old friends

  • 30-11-2009 2:43am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Just wondering is this a common problem, does anyone else find that friends you grew up with went through secondary maybe even primary school, you just come to the realisation that well...maybe you were friends for all that time cos ye were stuck together, and that now no one really likes eachother?

    you just feel obligated to meet up every few weeks and go for drinks, and ya you have a good time, but then you get home and start to think about the night and how really some of the comments they made about your boyfriend or girlfriend or your job were quite snide.

    I have been having this problem for a while now, i just find myself questioning whether or not these people actually like me and well do I really like them? I stopped talking to one of them because the person was well generally not nice (bitchy comments constantly) and I was just supposed to accept it "oh she is like that with everyone" ..but I didn't accept it and cut her out of my life, which I get a lot of guilt trips about.

    It will be taken from what I said that its me that doesn't like them anymore, which to some extent is true

    Anyway I guess what I'm asking is does anyone else have this problem? or something similar? sometimes I just don't think I have any friends


Comments

  • #2
    Monkey61
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,137 ✭✭✭Monkey61


    OP it is a fact of life that as you grow up and move on, a lot of your friends are going to grow apart. It is just the way it is. I don't know a single person I went to primary school with. I am still friends with three people I went to secondary school with and my best friend out of all those I wasn't even friends with during school. Even from college, I am still in contact with two people I spent four years with.

    The majority of my friends are just people I met otherwise and picked up along the way. Friends of friends I met at parties, former work colleagues, ex-girlfriends and friends of ex-girlfriends and just randomers that somehow drifted into my life. I have a core group of friends that I know I will be friends with forever, but sometimes we go through phases of drifting in and out when are lives are in different places. There are people I was best friends with two years ago that are now on my "see twice a year" acquaintance list. Then there are people that I have met in the last year that I think will be in my life forever and that I would see more often than my best friends.

    You change as you grow up, so of course others do too. I think the key is to look for friends everywhere and be open to making new relationships. If any of your friends aren't treating you as you want to be treated or just aren't clicking with you anymore - well just don't see them as much. It doesn't have to be a big cut-off, just ease away from them and find other people in your life.


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