He told me he loved me in a weird place

LegacyUser

I feel SO silly posting this, and feel free to tell me to get over myself but I really want opinions.
Im with my boyfriend a few months, Im in my late 20s he is ten years older (this is so you all know Im not a silly teenager!!). Anyway, things have been getting more serious lately, I've met his family etc and I really think this is "it" which has surprised me because I had a bad run of guys and was thinking I'd never meet anyone.
Last weekend he told me he loved me (yay!) but it was in the worst place and time possible. We were going for a taxi (I to my place, him to his, because of work we weren't spending the night) and were having a snog before going to the rank when he told me "I'm so in love with you". I was SO happy to hear it (first time I really felt a guy meant it and I am mad about him, but just not in the "love zone" yet) but all I was thinking was "couldn't you have picked a better place" (loads of people walking past as we were huddled in a doorway!) and time (just as I was leaving him for the night).
Is this really sad? Do I need to get over myself?
PS Anyone else have a worse place they were told this, so I can feel better?

John Mason

LOL my OH told me he loved in the smoking area of a really dodgy pub in temple bar, your story sounds so much sweeter then mine.

you were both going your seperate ways and he had to tell you before he left.:)

dirtydress

irishbird wrote: »

you were both going your seperate ways and he had to tell you before he left.:)

Thats exactly how my last bf told me, just as we were kissing to say goodnight...it was perfect! I dont know what you're bothered about its not like he was proposing to you and had to have some kind of scene set or something it was spontaneous and lovely...be happy!

g'em

amIsilly wrote: »

Last weekend he told me he loved me (yay!) but it was in the worst place and time possible. We were going for a taxi (I to my place, him to his, because of work we weren't spending the night) and were having a snog before going to the rank when he told me "I'm so in love with you". I was SO happy to hear it (first time I really felt a guy meant it and I am mad about him, but just not in the "love zone" yet) but all I was thinking was "couldn't you have picked a better place" (loads of people walking past as we were huddled in a doorway!) and time (just as I was leaving him for the night).

He told you he loved you - that's wonderful!! And in such a wonderful, spontaneous, open-hearted way, gawd I think that's so romantic!! I'd take huddling up together in a doorway over some poncy restaraunt and contrived speech any day of the week.

amIsilly wrote:

Is this really sad? Do I need to get over myself?

Honestly? Your reaction is sad, and you pretty much do. You can't let your expectations rule how this relationship plays out, you can't say "he must do x, y, and z in order for it to be "right". It's doomed before it begins if you do that, how can the poor guy do anything right when you've written the script but haven't told him what it is. Enjoy the moment and take it for what it is - he loves you, that's the important bit, not how he said it or where he said it.

amIsilly wrote:

PS Anyone else have a worse place they were told this, so I can feel better?

Your boyfriend told you he loves you. You should be bloomin' ecstatic over that alone

"If you love someone you say it ... you say it right there and then ... out loud. Otherwise the moment just ... passes you by"

Curvy Vixen

God there are too many Hallmark and Hollywood expectations in the world, seriously.

Surely the most important thing in the world is that this man loves you and needs/wants to tell you that he does?

I couldn't even tell you half the places my man has said that to me, what's important is that he actually does say it..and actually means it when he says it.

Enjoy it. There are many on here who would kill to hear it...even at a taxi rank

Taltos

He told you he loved you.

That is all you should need to feel better.
Look on the bright side - he could have said you are shallow and vain and he does not want to see you again...

Those Rom-Coms have a lot to answer for...

ash23

My ex told me he loved me by text :rolleyes:
He had been out one night while I was at home visiting family and he had a crap night. Went home, stuck on some music, tried to ring me but I was out and didn't hear the phone. He rang again, no answer so he sent a text saying "answer your phone, I need to tell you that I'm falling in love with you".


It was a bit odd as we were just friends at the time. It was another year before I returned the favour

kittenkiller

Yep, get over it.
He loves you.
He told you so.
It's not a story to tell your grandkids, but they'll probably never ask you about it anyway.
No one else really cares about the circumstances.
One of two friends might ask, but so what.

Congrats, all the best with the relationship!

Faith

My friend's boyfriend told her in McDonalds. They'd just come home from an amazingly romantic weekend away together, where she'd been expecting him to say it all along. But no, he waited until they were on their way home from the airport, at McDonalds. There was a reason behind it, but still!

Anywho, like the others have said, just be happy that he said it!

shellyboo

It's not a proposal, OP... you do need to cop on, I'm afraid. He wanted to say it and he just said it - that's great!

The first time I told my first boyfriend I loved him, we were in the middle of a fight. I was screaming at him! It doesn't matter where you say it.

wicklori

being very unromantic about the love statement!!

I was hammered one night on holidays and in front of his friends leaned over and whispered it in his ear. (They couldn't hear or anything) Still very unromantic but you know how these things seem like a good idea at the time!

His response-nothing Following night he asked me if I remembered saying it and I said I did as that is how I feel. Went a bit better after that!:)

I really don't think there's a right or a wrong way to say you love someone or a right or wrong 'place' for that to happen. Of course it's very romantic when it's just you and he looks you in the eye and says your name.... ahhhhhhh (butterflies!)

But-usually it takes a bit of building up to, and the poor guy took his thimbleful of courage in his hands and said it! Give him a bit of credit and don't think negatively of it!

Hallo World

yeah, I can see the problem OP is having.. .kiss goodnight, he felt he wanted to make sure she KNEW how he felt and could go home with that warm happy glow in her heart.. so he just comes out and says it..:D:D:D

my last g/f txt it to me after 7 months as she was heading for the airport for a week away with the girls.. that was the LONGEST 6 days of my life...

trying to reconcile now so I'd actually kill for her to murmur it to me regardless of the situation we were in!!! lol!!! :)

Good luck OP...

krudler

I tried to wait until the "perfect" moment to tell my current girlfriend which I could never seem to find as at the time we werent seeing much of each other with college and work and stuff and it nearly ruined our relationship, she thought I didnt feel the same way about her as she did about me (now granted she didnt tell me either but she's an old fashioned gal that way) I did tell her but it wasnt in the way I wanted to and it kinda dimished the impact, its my biggest regret in my relationship that i didnt just spit it out when we were on the couch at home or just hanging out rather than waiting for a Hallmark moment as someone already said, its not where you say it, its that you said it and mean it, I learnt my lesson with that

LegacyUser

But what if he has an equally unromantic and unplanned proposal? She won't have many romantic memories if this is how he does things, ie an unplanned and non-romantic way. Is romance dead in Ireland????

shellyboo

question???? wrote: »

But what if he has an equally unromantic and unplanned proposal? She won't have many romantic memories if this is how he does things, ie an unplanned and non-romantic way. Is romance dead in Ireland????

Who gives a crap, to be blunt. I'd pick an emotionally honest, stable relationship over sunsets and flowers any day of the week.

It's INSANE to be upset that someone didn't tell you they loved you in the "right way". There is no right way, and if there is, it's to say it when you feel it, and he did. I think that's more romantic than anything you'd care to come up with.

I'd rather my partner got down on one knee, on impulse, in the middle of a field because he FELT it was right than plan it for months to do some cheesy restaurant/Eiffel tower/sunset routine.

Too many Disney movies, folks. We're living in the real world here.

Curvy Vixen

question???? wrote: »

But what if he has an equally unromantic and unplanned proposal? She won't have many romantic memories if this is how he does things, ie an unplanned and non-romantic way. Is romance dead in Ireland????

Why does this matter...seriously....????? Surely she won't need memories if he's with her...my OH washing up for me is romantic to me!!

And what is romantic to you may not be to me. I think a snog in the rain with him telling me he loved me for the first time is extremely romantic...that would be someone else's idea of hell!

How much pressure is he under already to act 'correctly'?? It's a disaster waiting to happen with all of these expectations it really is

Terodil

question???? wrote: »

But what if he has an equally unromantic and unplanned proposal? She won't have many romantic memories if this is how he does things, ie an unplanned and non-romantic way. Is romance dead in Ireland????

Define romantic please. American-style vows before a game of football?!

Some people really pay far too much attention to appearances or get stuck in their barbie+ken world.

Edit/PS: Woops, sorry, didn't see all the replies above from the previous page ^^ -- apologies and +1 to you. Yes.

dublingal80

the poor guy! here he is telling you he loves you and you arent happy with the way he did it? What did you expect?? Music? Flower petals, baby angels?

you should be soooo happy he told you that! he probably wanted to say it for so long and just siad it when you guys were saying goodbye

the poor thing

SarahSassy

amIsilly wrote: »

Is this really sad? Do I need to get over myself?
PS Anyone else have a worse place they were told this, so I can feel better?

How ungrateful. The poor guy was probably building up the courage for ages to tell you. Yes you are acting sad and yes you need to get over this. Cant understand your motivation for posting this. You sound about 14

SarahSassy

question???? wrote: »

But what if he has an equally unromantic and unplanned proposal? She won't have many romantic memories if this is how he does things, ie an unplanned and non-romantic way. Is romance dead in Ireland????

No but romance doesnt have to be big gestures. Romance is from the heart not the pocket.

Niamho!

I wouldn't care....

Where would you have preffered? did you have an idea in your head?

I recently told my boy that i loved him, it was while we were sitting in a pub a few weeks ago. we were after having a little smooch and it just sorta came flying out. i actually couldn't hold it in. i had been trying to pluck up the courage for 2 weeks before that and never quite made it. hahaha

dublingal80

awww thats so cute!!! Similar to my story, was dying to tell my OH that i loved him, but since i was hurt in the past, i wanted him to say it first, so was very hard to keep it in. Anyhoo, we went out one night, my first time meeting all his friends, had a great night and towards the end, we found a dark corner where we had some kisses and he then just looked at me and said he loved me. I couldnt have been happier. I was DYING to hear the words for him. The place and all that didnt matter cos I loved him

Niamho!

I personally found it very hard to say. I couldn't believe that it would be so hard to do, and thats why i ended up just blurting it out.

OP, your boy MAY have been the same...

I personally wouldn't care where it's said. its nice to have it said at all.

extrinzic

OP, if this is all you can think about, I feel sorry for him.

carolmon

"He told me he loved me in a weird place"

I really got the wrong meaning out of that title................




OP really I don't get it, all looks good for you, a warm, loving open and spontaneous guy who's not playing games.... where's the problem?

I've heard of people planning proposals but I never knew there was meant to be a special place to say "I love you"?? Surely you just say if when you feel it?

I think you should just enjoy the moment, it actually sounds lovely.

mood

shellyboo wrote: »

It's not a proposal, OP... you do need to cop on, I'm afraid. He wanted to say it and he just said it - that's great!
.

Agree.

iguana

SarahSassy wrote: »

No but romance doesnt have to be big gestures. Romance is from the heart not the pocket.

+1.

I have to say that if I told someone I loved them in the circumstances described and I found out it upset them so much, I would be re-thinking my feelings.

Alessandra

I actually think the way he told you was infinitely more romantic that any contrived situation where people feel they need to do something big to show their love.
Sounds like it was completely spontaneous and genuine, who cares where it was?

You don't seem to appreciate this guy.

extrinzic

extrinzic wrote: »

OP, if this is all you can think about, I feel sorry for him.

+1

Just seems to me like you're looking for things to worry about. Just be happy he said it. The first time I told my boyfriend I loved him has to be the least romantic ever. We were just seeing each other for a while, I was at his house and had too much to drink. We were on the bus back to mine when I suddenly knew I was about to puke. I had to press the button to stop the bus in the middle of Rathmines and barely made it off before I puked I was so ashamed and embarrassed but he was really understanding and lovely about it, made sure I was OK, got me some water and hailed a taxi. He was so sweet that I felt right there and then I just had to tell him how I felt. Bit embarrassing but it's better than some contrived 'romantic' scenario, imo.

iguana

[quote=[Deleted User];62999239]The first time I told my boyfriend I loved him has to be the least romantic ever. We were just seeing each other for a while, I was at his house and had too much to drink. We were on the bus back to mine when I suddenly knew I was about to puke. I had to press the button to stop the bus in the middle of Rathmines and barely made it off before I puked I was so ashamed and embarrassed but he was really understanding and lovely about it, made sure I was OK, got me some water and hailed a taxi. He was so sweet that I felt right there and then I just had to tell him how I felt. Bit embarrassing but it's better than some contrived 'romantic' scenario, imo.[/QUOTE]

That is very, very similar to the first time my husband told me he loves me.:(:pac: