Problem with women Im seeing

troubleshooter

Been out on 5 dates with a women, we really connect, loads of common intrests, some dates last 10 hours, we go off and explore somewhere new, shes affectionate in being tactile,great touch, and always texts, v complimentry.

Yet she wont kiss properly, ie tounges or anything else, went out all evening Saturday, we went back to hers about 2 am, we both crashed on her sofa, cuddled/held each other, I was knackered falling asleep, in a kind of blissfull way. Asked if we could crash on her bed, just hold each other, said I would keep my kit on. Anyway, she did want even that, did not even offer to let me sleep on the sofa, let me drive home 40 miles when I was seriously knackered.

This morning texts me how wonderful I am, what a great time we had, how we are so connected blah, blah, blah.

Fast losing patience, only for the connection I would have let this go. Not sure how long to give it.

LegacyUser

I have to say that was pretty bad of her not to even let you stay on the sofa

But to sort this out you really have to talk to her face to face about it

I don't mean to sound bad but there is no one here who can give you the answer as to why she let you travel home 40 miles in the middle if the night, That was really bad in my opinion and I'm a female, maybe she has a valid reason, I'd ask her and see what she says, good luck

LegacyUser

I think that you need to look at the positives. You've met each other. You both get on very very well and you have a real connection. She obviously has issues with phyisical closeness. There may be a reason for this. Maybe she's uneasy with that side of a relationship. Maybe she's bad history with getting too close too soon. Anyway, there are many reasons why this may be the case. You're just not aware of it yet.

Have you tried to talk to her about it? Are you able to bring it up in a way she feels ok with? I think it's still relatively early days. But you seem to get on well with her. I think these things can iron themselves out if you give her time and gain her trust. The more comfortable she is with you the more open she will become about physical side of things. But you need to talk. But play it carefully. There may be good reasons why she's sensitive about it.

I do think it's not fair to not be able to sleep on sofa at 2am given that you live a 4o mile drive away. It's just not safe! Relationship or not I'd have someone on my sofa to avoid such a trip... It's a matter of safety!!

shellyboo

Ok, my opinion - 5 dates without a proper kiss aren't proper dates. Are you sure she's into you romantically? There has to be a reason why she's keeping you at arm's length, and you need to find out what it is. Tell her you're hurt that she wouldn't even let you sleep on the couch, ask her why, and take it from there.

Mackleton

Agree with Shellyboo on this one. As a girl, I think 5 dates is more than acceptable for a woman to be at least kissing a guy if not more. There is certainly some kind of reason she is holding back. If she is a tactile as you say, this would indicate that she is attracted to you, but then the lack of kissing suggests otherwise. I would want to (in a gentle way) find out if she is uncomfortable about something or if she is in fact thinking of you that way at all. The sooner you do this the better, you won't both have wasted months on something that had no future. Good luck.

troubleshooter

Mackleton wrote: »

Agree with Shellyboo on this one. As a girl, I think 5 dates is more than acceptable for a woman to be at least kissing a guy if not more. There is certainly some kind of reason she is holding back. If she is a tactile as you say, this would indicate that she is attracted to you, but then the lack of kissing suggests otherwise. I would want to (in a gentle way) find out if she is uncomfortable about something or if she is in fact thinking of you that way at all. The sooner you do this the better, you won't both have wasted months on something that had no future. Good luck.

Its so weird, told me she fancied me where she saw me somewhere but we never spoke, told me I was good looking, which was nice. Told her I liked black nail varnish, third date she turned up with black nail varish. Told me she was prviously in a very abusive relationship and has not been in a relationship awhile.

The whole thing is strange, if it was not for the connection I would not bother.

Told me on the phone tonight, she did not let me stay cause it was her time of the month...yet shes 47 ffs.

I will give it two more goes, the fact shes so complying is very nice for me, asks me what she should wear for dates etc,she knows I like black, so wears black etc, yet wont kiss me properly, bizarre.

Shes got lots of phobias, Ive come to the conclusion its part of it.

Gyalist

10 hour dates?? You're already investing way too much time. You can't be surprised that your time is taken for granted.

About the no kissing: in my experience, a sign of sexual abuse.

BTW, she did you a favour by not allowing you to sleep with her in her bed. There's no surer way to emasculate yourself than by sleeping fully clothed with someone that you have a sexual interest in when there has been no previous sexual contact. That's the way to cuddlebitch/male-girlfriend territory.

troubleshooter

Gyalist wrote: »

10 hour dates?? You're already investing way too much time. You can't be surprised that your time is taken for granted.

About the no kissing: in my experience, a sign of sexual abuse.

10 hours cause its great being around each other.

The kissing bit is intresting, yep she told me she hated her father, moved out at 17 never spoke to him again, bingo !

Been out with one other who admitted to being abused by her father, she was the other way, low self esteem as well, but a pathological liar could not say no to male attention, v promiscuos.

I do seem to attract these vulnerable types, dont know why.

"That's the way to cuddlebitch/male-girlfriend territory. "

............Is that from experience ??

jam_mac_jam

Maybe just give it a bit more time, people are all different and there might be a reason, she could be right for you but you should at least find out the reason before dropping it.

lolli

Maybe she had a bad experience before after letting someone stay at her house.

Maybe she just wants to take things slow and get to know you before even letting you stay over.

Gyalist

troubleshooter wrote: »

10 hours cause its great being around each other.

The kissing bit is intresting, yep she told me she hated her father, moved out at 17 never spoke to him again, bingo !

Been out with one other who admitted to being abused by her father, she was the other way, low self esteem as well, but a pathological liar could not say no to male attention, v promiscuos.

I do seem to attract these vulnerable types, dont know why.

"That's the way to cuddlebitch/male-girlfriend territory. "

............Is that from experience ??

10 hours is way too much "face time" regardless of how well you get on together. If you don't value your time you can't expect others to.

The woman has actually told you that she was sexually abused by her father. You just missed the sub-communication in the message.

Kissing is actually a more intimate act than sex for many women. That's why she is avoiding kissing you because of her fear of intimacy caused by her sexual trauma.

troubleshooter

Gyalist wrote: »

10 hours is way too much "face time" regardless of how well you get on together. If you don't value your time you can't expect others to.

The woman has actually told you that she was sexually abused by her father. You just missed the sub-communication in the message.

Kissing is actually a more intimate act than sex for many women. That's why she is avoiding kissing you because of her fear of intimacy.

Save the american dating psycho babble youve got from websites and books, lots of people hate their fathers she told me he had been violent to their mother, does not automatically mean she was abused, she had a kid at 18, so cant have been bothered by intimacy. She was married for 10 yrs also and had other relationships.

If you meet some and its natural/good, then dating by book etc does not come into we both have shared intrests I enjoy her company.

Who the fcuk are you to say "I dont value my time".

I will crack it with this women, I love the challenge, she just has issues.

we are building trust. How mamy women are an easy lay yet stubbon as a mule, this one is back to front, she a total novalty.

This is how I date women, I totally mirror and syncronise with them psychologically and give lots of TLC and understanding, after 5 dates I start to limit it/go colder, it really works. its the push/pull thing.

This one is actually nice, but yet back to front, if you know what I mean, she loves me making the choices, even what she wears, the sex thing will take time but when it does, its game, set and match.# Hence my patience.

Gyalist

You'd notice in my very first post that I prefaced by response by saying "in my experience". I could elaborate much more but even though I'm anonymous on this board I feel that I would be breaking the trust of the persons concerned if I did.

Good luck with "building trust".

troubleshooter

Gyalist wrote: »

You'd notice in my very first post that I prefaced by response by saying "in my experience". I could elaborate much more but even though I'm anonymous on this board I feel that I would be breaking the trust of the persons concerned if I did.

Good luck with "building trust".

In your experince, what of reading books on being a PUA, ha, keep dreaming.

Zaph

OK troubleshooter, you're being offered advice and other peoples' experiences here. If you don't want to listen to any of it, fair enough, but ease off on the hostility or I will lock this thread.

troubleshooter

Zaph wrote: »

OK troubleshooter, you're being offered advice and other peoples' experiences here. If you don't want to listen to any of it, fair enough, but ease off on the hostility or I will lock this thread.

Advice is welcome but not underhanded insults.

Zaph

troubleshooter wrote: »

Advice is welcome but not underhanded insults.

If you have an issue with a particular post please use the report post button. Any more hostile remarks to other posters will result in further action being taken.

Mina Loy

Hmm Troubleshooter its hard to tell if you are being sarcastic or if its totally farsical..ie made up post for a laugh. If it is true about the push/pull thing and your 'routine' you use for getting women into bed, then perhaps the reason she pushes you away and doesn't want you on her couch is she is afraid or wary of you, especially if she had an abusive relationship before, some women tend to go for the same kind of guy subconsciously. I'm not saying you're physically abusive but you seem to be the type who would get enjoyment out of getting someones guard down, using them then dropping them like a piece of dirt. If you were not being sarcastic with your quick tempered response to advice then I feel sorry for the woman.

Mina Loy

troubleshooter wrote: »

I do seem to attract these vulnerable types, dont know why.

I missed this bit before I posted last. Oh dear..yeah, you attract these 'types' because its what women in distress/suffering from controlling/abusive relationships in their past still go for . Its familiar territory. Your initial full on , strong persuing of them makes them feel wanted, yet when it comes down to it, if she does sleep with you it will be out of a sense of obligation, self hatred for that and very vague and faint hope she can turn you back into the man who pursued her so aggressively before you went to your 'push' mode. Sad.

troubleshooter

Mina Loy wrote: »

I missed this bit before I posted last. Oh dear..yeah, you attract these 'types' because its what women in distress/suffering from controlling/abusive relationships in their past still go for . Its familiar territory. Your initial full on , strong persuing of them makes them feel wanted, yet when it comes down to it, if she does sleep with you it will be out of a sense of obligation, self hatred for that and very vague and faint hope she can turn you back into the man who pursued her so aggressively before you went to your 'push' mode. Sad.

Actually Im not a controlling person, but am confident in who I am, in recent times am attract to/attract type D/low dominance women. I do like this woman asking what she should wear etc.

I do the push/pull thing simply because it works psychologically. As for sleeping with me out of obligation, its not my motive for her to have to do that. I dont have a problem getting sex, could have a one night stand most weekends, but not really into it, physically or mentally it dont do it for me, have even turned down offers from women to be fcuk buddies, simply cause I feel to ill. I find getting to know someone much more intresting, ie what they enjoy/makes them tick.
Was happily married for years, but my wife died 4 yrs ago.

Im 40 my health is fcuked from gulf war syndrome from my army service, most of the time walk around feeling ill, my liver feels like its been kicked in, feel like I have the flu most of the time, being a player is not what Im about, perhaps cause of this I feel much better around more laid back type D females. I certainly am physcially not the man I was, who could drink ten pints, and get up/go out next morning for a 5 mile run, loved physcial stuff etc, was up for it with anything that wore a skirt, before I got married. My whole psychological male construct has been challenged, due illness and life, I have had to change my whole world outlook including what I want in a partner. Next time we meet I will ask her what her problem with intimacy is really all about.

Emme

What is a type D female?

ash23

I think if you are going for the submissive type then you have to accept that most women who are submissive are like that because of emotional problems.
You like that she asks what she should wear and that she isn't "stubborn as a mule". Basically you like that she is weak and brow beaten and looks to you for approval.
Most emotionally healthy women will dress to please themselves and make their own decisions. Most emotionally healthy women will also like kissing and sex and emotional and physical intimacy.
The things you like and the things you don't like are intertwined.

Of course, it might be that she just isn't physically attracted to you but that she likes the "closeness" of being held, going out, spending time with you etc, because she is lonely.

BumbleB

troubleshooter wrote: »

Save the american dating psycho babble youve got from websites and books,


This is how I date women, I totally mirror and syncronise with them psychologically and give lots of TLC and understanding, after 5 dates I start to limit it/go colder, it really works. its the push/pull thing.

Hypocrytical point of view , Everything sounds really calculated not really the basis for a loving relationship.

troubleshooter

Emme wrote: »

What is a type D female?

According to psychologists there are 4 personality types, A or Alphas, ie leaders, only about 5 % of the population. B/betas in women they are party girls/v sociable types. C are organisers/accountant/teacher types. D or delta are those who are content to go along with others ideas/low dominance.

Personality types compliment each other, often the same type together A and A, B and B etc clash.

troubleshooter

BumbleB wrote: »

Hypocrytical point of view , Everything sounds really calculated not really the basis for a loving relationship.

Not really Im into NLP. Mirroring is part of it.

troubleshooter

ash23 wrote: »

I think if you are going for the submissive type then you have to accept that most women who are submissive are like that because of emotional problems.
You like that she asks what she should wear and that she isn't "stubborn as a mule". Basically you like that she is weak and brow beaten and looks to you for approval.
Most emotionally healthy women will dress to please themselves and make their own decisions. Most emotionally healthy women will also like kissing and sex and emotional and physical intimacy.
The things you like and the things you don't like are intertwined.

Of course, it might be that she just isn't physically attracted to you but that she likes the "closeness" of being held, going out, spending time with you etc, because she is lonely.

Shes told me she is physically attracted to me. I am not responsible for someones past, if she enjoys being around me and I empower her by us journeying together, and I see into aspects of myself from being around her, what is wrong with that ?

ash23

troubleshooter wrote: »

Shes told me she is physically attracted to me. I am not responsible for someones past, if she enjoys being around me and I empower her by us journeying together, and I see into aspects of myself from being around her, what is wrong with that ?

You're missing my point. She is the submissive type because of her past. No, you are not responsible for her past. But if you want to be with her you need to be patient while she works through her issues. But you also need to appreciate that if she does overcome her current issues with kissing and her sexuality and the need to keep you at arms length, then you may also find that she becomes more empowered and self assured and is no longer as submissive as she was.

You say that you keep attracting emotionally damaged women, well, you are the common factor.
You are attracted to emotionally damaged women. Fair enough. But as I said, that comes with a downside too. In this case its a fear of intimacy. Only you can decide which is more important to you. The submissive nature of this woman or the need for sex.
In my opinion, with this woman, you will not have both. She will either be submissive and sexually repressed or she will work on her repression and become an emotionally more healthy person and be less submissive.

loloray

troubleshooter wrote: »

BumbleB wrote:

Hypocrytical point of view , Everything sounds really calculated not really the basis for a loving relationship.

Not really Im into NLP. Mirroring is part of it.

?! Isn't that exactly the point BumbleB is making! NLP is all about calculating!

Kimia

OP it sounds like 'The Game' is your handbook?

Best of luck ever finding any woman that you 'connect' with. You don't connect with this woman - you are manipulative and conniving and she's not falling under your spell yet so you're frustrated.

I would run a mile from someone like you. Mirroring indeed. I would be horrified if I was dating someone where every moment was actually bullsh*t and just some psycho-babble crap that he read in a book by some other loser.

It's not a game this is actually real life. Grow up. In fact I doubt this is real.

troubleshooter

Kimia wrote: »

OP it sounds like 'The Game' is your handbook?

Best of luck ever finding any woman that you 'connect' with. You don't connect with this woman - you are manipulative and conniving and she's not falling under your spell yet so you're frustrated.

I would run a mile from someone like you. Mirroring indeed. I would be horrified if I was dating someone where every moment was actually bullsh*t and just some psycho-babble crap that he read in a book by some other loser.

It's not a game this is actually real life. Grow up. In fact I doubt this is real.

The game is a manual for players, I am not a player. Im into NLP, I like D types cause I enjoy helping others overcome their "self limiting beliefs. "

I am not manipulative, NLP is simply psychological a tool for getting what you want from any given situation. Women do it by wearing low cut tops, killer heels etc, men dont have that option, whos hypocritical ?



This is more my thing.

troubleshooter

loloray wrote: »

?! Isn't that exactly the point BumbleB is making! NLP is all about calculating!

No NLP is about helping people see from a different perspective and over come their self limiting beliefs, in my friends case fear of water/sexuality etc. I really enjoy helping women work through their "issues", Im a very giving person.

She asked the universe and here I am

Eve_Dublin

Listen Troubleshooter....you came on here looking for advice and I think Ash123 has given you some great advice. If everything was going so well for you then you wouldn´t post up here. It sounds like you have a (highly calculated and downright creepy) plan of action and nothing anyone here will say will make you change your mind. Whatever you do, respect that poor women. She´s clearly been through enough in her life as it is and you can empathise to some degree because it sounds like you have too, so PLEASE put yourself in her shoes and treat her how you would like to be treated.

troubleshooter

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

Listen Troubleshooter....you came on here looking for advice and I think Ash123 has given you some great advice. If everything was going so well for you then you wouldn´t post up here. It sounds like you have a (highly calculated and downright creepy) plan of action and nothing anyone here will say will make you change your mind. Whatever you do, respect that poor women. She´s clearly been through enough in her life as it is and you can empathise to some degree because it sounds like you have too, so PLEASE put yourself in her shoes and treat her how you would like to be treated.

Stop projecting your past disappointments onto me please, where did I say I did not respect her ?

Where did I say it was all going well, I have never met anyone like this before, sexuality wise, so its thrown me.

I dont have any "plan of action", I simply want to help her overcome her self limiting beliefs.

Miss Fluff

troubleshooter wrote: »

I will crack it with this women, I love the challenge, she just has issues.

we are building trust. How mamy women are an easy lay yet stubbon as a mule, this one is back to front, she a total novalty.

This is how I date women, I totally mirror and syncronise with them psychologically and give lots of TLC and understanding, after 5 dates I start to limit it/go colder, it really works. its the push/pull thing.

This one is actually nice, but yet back to front, if you know what I mean, she loves me making the choices, even what she wears, the sex thing will take time but when it does, its game, set and match.# Hence my patience.

It sounds like a plan of action to me if ever there was one.

troubleshooter

Miss Fluff wrote: »

It sounds like a plan of action to me if ever there was one.

No thats just the way I date, in terms of her, I just want to help her overcome her issues, empower her, she told me she feels amazing energy when Im around her.

We meditate together, link our chakra points, emotionally and spiritually connect.

I like taking her to another level. Will do so sexually as well, teach her tantra etc, when it happens.

Im a one off my friend, ha.

Blazer

troubleshooter wrote: »

Im a one off my friend, ha.

A one-off fúcked up guy.

Hopefully the woman is boards member and I hope she comes across this thread and recognises you.
You're no different to the scum she has left behind.

LegacyUser

Ok, I think there are three possibilities here

1 OP is a nasty piece of work, a manipulative little creep with no respect for this woman

2 OP is lying and Op is just having a laugh

3 OP is insane


Assuming this post isn't joke (which I think is probably is). I think you need to think about whether or not you like this woman as a person or you just think of her as a challenge (game, set and match??). It almost sounds like you feel like you're getting one over on her by sleeping with her! This is not what relationships should be about.

If she doesn't want you staying over yet, it's probably because she just wants to take things slowly. To be honest as your post goes on it has become more and more clear why she might not want you over in the house at this stage, maybe she's noticed how manipulative you seem to be. Or maybe she's just not to sure about you yet, if you like her keep seeing her and let her take her time, but stop looking at her like some thought of conquest.

I actually find it quite disturbing that you like subordinate women, even to the extent that they need you to tell them what to where. Is it because they are easier for you to manipulate?

I find it quite amusing that at one point in this threat you asked someone to drop the psychobable and since then all you have talked is psychobable - Chakras, tantra, type D females. Forget this bollocks.

troubleshooter

Berkut wrote: »

A one-off fúcked up guy.

Hopefully the woman is boards member and I hope she comes across this thread and recognises you.
You're no different to the scum she has left behind.

I have not said anything derogatory, Im teaching her NLP as well.

Scum ? No thats just you projecting your own standards, cant handle the fact Im a genuine person, so you look for your standards in others, I am not you my friend.

LegacyUser

Problem I see is that you don't seem to regard her as an equal in whatever relationship you are in together. You don't seem happy about her setting her own pace in what she does and doesn't want to share with you. You talk about her like a challenge or a project, that you will eventually bring her round to doing things your way and her life will be the better for it. You sound patronising when you talk about how you are going to initiate her into your sexual preferences, nothing about how you are going to learn from hers. You're going to empower her? I think that's for her to decide sunshine.

On the initial scenario, if she doesn't want you in the house, even a separate room, at certain times, she is telling you something about her boundaries, you need to listen to her. She does NOT need you to condescendingly help her overcome her beliefs, she needs her beliefs respected about how she wants to conduct her own life!

Eve_Dublin

troubleshooter wrote: »

I have not said anything derogatory, Im teaching her NLP as well.

Scum ? No thats just you projecting your own standards, cant handle the fact Im a genuine person, so you look for your standards in others, I am not you my friend.

You give me the serious heebie-jeebies, troubleshooter. Seems like there´s YOUR standards and everybody elses. Get with the programme. We´re all as individual as a snowflake and I´m guessing most of us in here are pretty genuine but there´s basic standard for common decency. If I posted up here with my attempts at starting a relationship with a man (which would mean I was looking for advice) and NOBODY agreed that it was the right way to go about it, I´d start to reconsider my tactics. Fact.

kenbrady

troubleshooter wrote: »

No thats just the way I date, in terms of her, I just want to help her overcome her issues, empower her, she told me she feels amazing energy when Im around her.

We meditate together, link our chakra points, emotionally and spiritually connect.

I like taking her to another level. Will do so sexually as well, teach her tantra etc, when it happens.

Im a one off my friend, ha.

Yea a one off, like all the other million+ people who are under the spell of NLP practioneers. You are not a one off, you are a sheep, you are just reading books, going to seminars and following what they tell you.

You are then going out looking for vulnerable woman to try and save. You think NLP saved you and you want to save others, that is how cults are formed. One leader doesn't recruit everyone. He recruits a group and gets them to recruit others.

You actions toward this woman seem clinical, like an experiment, you clearly have no interest in or have never experienced what it is like to be in a proper loving relationship, based on respect and equality.

If you control everything and never experience the fear and excitment that comes with unpredictibility, they you haven't truely lived.

troubleshooter

Eve_Dublin wrote: »

You give me the serious heebie-jeebies, troubleshooter. Seems like there´s YOUR standards and everybody elses. Get with the programme. We´re all is individual is a snowflake and I´m guessing most of us in here are pretty genuine but there´s basic standard for common decency. If I posted up here with my attempts at starting a relationship with a man (which would mean I was looking for advice) and NOBODY agreed that it was the right way to go about it, I´d start to reconsider my tactics. Fact.

Yes but your not speaking with integrity Eve are you ? all I hear is your ego wanting to be proven right for all those past mistakes you blame on someone else.

You will never learn Eve, just continue your fantasy of meeting Mr wonderful on those dating sites you frequent, look in the mirror my friend and stop projecting your cynicism about life and men in general onto others. I am not the enemy.

troubleshooter

kenbrady wrote: »

Yea a one off, like all the other million+ people who are under the spell of NLP practioneers. You are not a one off, you are a sheep, you are just reading books, going to seminars and following what they tell you.

You are then going out looking for vulnerable woman to try and save. You think NLP saved you and you want to save others, that is how cults are formed. One leader doesn't recruit everyone. He recruits a group and gets them to recruit others.

You actions toward this woman seem clinical, like an experiment, you clearly have no interest in or have never experienced what it is like to be in a proper loving relationship, based on respect and equality.

If you control everything and never experience the fear and excitment that comes with unpredictibility, they you haven't truely lived.

NLP is simply a psychological tool which can be applied to a given situation, it has no leader.

I simply said for various reasons I get on best with D type females, nothing sinister in that, its just the way it is.

QUOTE
you clearly have no interest in or have never experienced what it is like to be in a proper loving relationship, based on respect and equality.

................Really, I was with my wife since she was 15-33, I would have crawled to the end of the earth on my hands and knees over broken glass for her, I totally adored her, what do you know. :rolleyes:


QUOTE you haven't truely lived.

................Really, thats a subjective statement, but my moneys on me having done alot more on every level then you in life.

kenbrady

I'm a sales manager and have done a lot of NLP courses with work, so I know the drill, more than you will ever know.

troubleshooter wrote: »

Yes but your not speaking with integrity Eve are you ? all I hear is your ego wanting to be proven right for all those past mistakes you blame on someone else.

You will never learn Eve, just continue your fantasy of meeting Mr wonderful on those dating sites you frequent, look in the mirror my friend and stop projecting your cynicism about life and men in general onto others. I am not the enemy.

You are trying to attack this poster and drag her down so that you can get an advantage over her. Everything you said about her came from inside your head, it has no bases in reality. This is why you can only form relationship with weak/broken woman, as it's the only way you can feel equal/power in the relationship.

troubleshooter wrote: »

NLP is simply a psychological tool which can be applied to a given situation, it has no leader.

Oh they got you good, "there are no leaders here, we are all part of a community, just make the cheque for the seminar out to Mr L. Eader"

Mina Loy

I simply said for various reasons I get on best with D type females, nothing sinister in that, its just the way it is


Troubleshooter the reason you get on best with type D females is because they're easy to manipulate. How about trying your mumbo jumbo on a Type A? She'd laugh in your face and call you a creep.You're using NLP as an overly complicated pickup line basically. From reading your posts you are incredibly reactionary. You have taken noones advice and you obviously don't plan to. So either leave your attitude at the door and get what you came for , or continue to think you're right and more than likely fail in this relationship too. I also gather from the poor grammar and syntax in your posts you're not Irish, not meaning to generalise but if an Irish guy posted this he'd get a more severe bashing, and indeed would probably admit he's only doing it to get laid.

How about you and me go out on a date and you try use NLP on me? I wouldn't say I'm an alpha as you say, but I'm not vulnerable and suffering from PST from a past relationship so ..I doubt it'd work. :rolleyes:

BumbleB

troubleshooter wrote: »

Yes but your not speaking with integrity Eve are you ? all I hear is your ego wanting to be proven right for all those past mistakes you blame on someone else.

You will never learn Eve, just continue your fantasy of meeting Mr wonderful on those dating sites you frequent, look in the mirror my friend and stop projecting your cynicism about life and men in general onto others. I am not the enemy.

So this is an prime example of the kind of help you offer . No thanks !!!!

troubleshooter

Mina Loy wrote: »

I simply said for various reasons I get on best with D type females, nothing sinister in that, its just the way it is


Troubleshooter the reason you get on best with type D females is because they're easy to manipulate. How about trying your mumbo jumbo on a Type A? She'd laugh in your face and call you a creep.You're using NLP as an overly complicated pickup line basically. From reading your posts you are incredibly reactionary. You have taken noones advice and you obviously don't plan to. So either leave your attitude at the door and get what you came for , or continue to think you're right and more than likely fail in this relationship too. I also gather from the poor grammar and syntax in your posts you're not Irish, not meaning to generalise but if an Irish guy posted this he'd get a more severe bashing, and indeed would probably admit he's only doing it to get laid.

How about you and me go out on a date and you try use NLP on me? I wouldn't say I'm an alpha as you say, but I'm not vulnerable and suffering from PST from a past relationship so ..I doubt it'd work. :rolleyes:

I never said you were an alpha, get on with type D simply cause the chemistry is right, dont do career women or organisor types, they are too anchored to consensus reality, they bore me. Actually went out with an attractive alpha company director only a few weeks ago, I dropped her, she did not do it for me.I swear on my sons life, she has called and texted and even asked if we could be friends, even said if I change my mind I know where she is.

NLP works on alphas too, but alpha and alpha is not a good match and as for betas well im not into party girls, just wanna meet someone to chill with, whos got integrity, v important to me.

Im not doing it to get laid, I have no shortage of offers.

How about you and me on a date......dont think you got that lucky my friend, ha.

Eve_Dublin

troubleshooter wrote: »

Yes but your not speaking with integrity Eve are you ? all I hear is your ego wanting to be proven right for all those past mistakes you blame on someone else.

You will never learn Eve, just continue your fantasy of meeting Mr wonderful on those dating sites you frequent, look in the mirror my friend and stop projecting your cynicism about life and men in general onto others. I am not the enemy.

You clearly know very little about me or my situation. No, it´s not me looking for advice here buddy....not once have I posted on here with man troubles (not yet!) because I certainly DO learn from my mistakes and I take the advice of others. I´ve JUST ended a relationship with A Mr. Wonderful because I´ve just moved to a new country and I don´t want to the Long Distance thing like we both did in the past and didn´t suit either of us. A mature and honest decision, I think....and I´m 10 years younger than you. You´re talking like you´re a man who can´t listen to other people. And as if it matters, never been on a dating website in my life...haven´t been in one country long enough in about 6 years and if I was, what does it matter? Many people find honest, true love on the internet. No shame in that whereas the way you´re going about your quest for love is slimy, disrespectful and downright creepy. I´m not the only one who thinks so I suspect I might be right.

I have a funny feeling this woman is not sleeping with you because she is senses this too. You clearly like making people feel small...like your "girlfriend", like other posters here...you made up a whole scenario in your head regarding my love life. Why?

Pathetic.

troubleshooter

kenbrady wrote: »

I'm a sales manager and have done a lot of NLP courses with work, so I know the drill, more than you will ever know.


You are trying to attack this poster and drag her down so that you can get an advantage over her. Everything you said about her came from inside your head, it has no bases in reality. This is why you can only form relationship with weak/broken woman, as it's the only way you can feel equal/power in the relationship.


Oh they got you good, "there are no leaders here, we are all part of a community, just make the cheque for the seminar out to Mr L. Eader"

Stop being so excitable, You know more then me, good for you.

You dont have to pay for seminars, buy a book in waterstones, watch the vids on you tube, your first steps to having the inner self awareness women so look for in a guy.

Mina Loy

troubleshooter wrote: »

I never said you were an alpha, get on with type D simply cause the chemistry is right, dont do career women or organisor types, they are too anchored to consensus reality, they bore me. Actually went out with an alpha company director only a few weeks ago, I dropped her, she did not do it for me.

NLP works on alphas too, but alpha and alpha is not a good match and as for betas well im not into party girls, just wanna meet someone to chill with, whos got integrity, v important to me.

Im not doing it to get laid, I have no shortage of offers.

How about you and me on a date......dont think you got that lucky my friend, ha.

Urr no you're grand love, I prefer my men less caustic to be honest !

To me it seems like you may actually fare better in the S&M world. There are no shortage of sub women looking for masters etc who are quite normal the submissive part of their personality is purely what psychologically and sexually satisfies them. This way you won't have any problems with lack of affection, as its pretty much determined by you when you get it and when she gives it. Its not all about whips and leather you know, it can be quite minimalist.
Unfortunately though the BDSM world is quite tight knit and involves a lot of trust, the people are actually quite normal and there is a lot of mutual respect. You don't seem to have the capacity to be courteous and listen to people even when you're the one who asks for it. Listening is a big part of a dom/sub relationship.

Anyway, sorry if its sounds off topic but that is just what came to mind reading your posts and your 'predicament' .

troubleshooter

Mina Loy wrote: »

Urr no you're grand love, I prefer my men less caustic to be honest !

To me it seems like you may actually fare better in the S&M world. There are no shortage of sub women looking for masters etc who are quite normal the submissive part of their personality is purely what psychologically and sexually satisfies them. This way you won't have any problems with lack of affection, as its pretty much determined by you when you get it and when she gives it. Its not all about whips and leather you know, it can be quite minimalist.
Unfortunately though the BDSM world is quite tight knit and involves a lot of trust, the people are actually quite normal and there is a lot of mutual respect. You don't seem to have the capacity to be courteous and listen to people even when you're the one who asks for it. Listening is a big part of a dom/sub relationship.


Anyway, sorry if its sounds off topic but that is just what came to mind reading your posts and your 'predicament' .

How little you know, most alpha women are sexually sub, the sub gets all the pleasure is really in control, not really into alphas. 24/7 subs are rare and most have a screw lose.

Now that s and m is mainstream like porn its lost its edge, went to a bdsm "munch", full of career type alphas females as subs, dysfunctional low esteem women as dom and guys either into dungeons and dragons or looking like accountants, not my scene, sounds like yours though.

I dont have a predicament, just met someone out of the norm.