Some people - normally average, but when no-one's looking; legends.

Tellox

We all have them; those mate's who are perfectly fine in their own way, maybe a good laugh to head out and have a pint with, respectable enough, and have nothing in particular wrong with them.

But when nobody's around - their absolute legendary form comes out.

That friend of yours who just has no luck with the opposite sex? Surrounded by potential mating partners, and snorting coke off their privates over the weekend. What about your shy mate who can't drive? Rallying through the backroads at 90mph while being chased by the gardaí search chopper last Monday. He had to bomb it because he was delivering half a million's worth of acid to a major crime ring. While getting a sloppy blowjob from Riley Mason. But you were off visiting your folks at the time.

I think the worst I've heard so far is off one chap who informed me that he had a professional contract as a back-up drummer for various bands, such as Pantera, the Blizzards etc. And apparently these bands needed backup drummers a LOT, leading him to playing many massive gigs around the country. And the worst part about it all was me believing him due to him actually being a decent enough drummer - but needless to say, I wound up looking like some twat when telling my mates about him. The truth behind his antics of course became a little more plain to see (**** you they weren't plain enough already) after he started changing his msn pictures to photo's of guys that look a little like him, but with extremely long hair - and began telling everyone that it was him a few years back.

Another chap I know once came out with the tale that he was attempting to kill himself by throwing himself into the river suir with a brick tied around his neck (which would not have worked too well to begin with), stated that while doing so, 3 gardaí came along and told him to step back from the river. He finished the tale by informing us that he held two of the gardaí up by the scruff of the neck (at the same time, one hand per neck), while the other guard did a runner in pure terror.

And finally, a bit of a sadder one; there's a guy who I used to work with who was of the honest opinion that everyone in the office thought he was amazing based off his WoW gear. Regardless of the fact that the vast majority of people he worked with did not play WoW. He came into work, recounting tales of staying up all night and single-handedly beating 40-man level 60 (or whatever the level cap is now) instances in order to get the best gear; to back up his important stories in reality, he spent around 80% of his paycheque (from a fulltime job) on buying WoW Gold. Every week. What truly saddened me about this story is that other stories you would hear usually involve sex, money or being talented. This man instead choose to tell us about virtual money and clothes; and spent his real money to back his stories up.

Mind, it's a shame there's not more people spending money to back things up. I wouldn't mind one of my "woman magnet" friends hiring a few decent looking prostitutes every weekend.

So, what amazing stories have you been regaled with by your otherwise average acquaintances?

i think i am going to have a scrambled egg for breakfast and maybe some soup and bread a little later on.

Joey the lips

You need to get out more and meet new friends. Oh and keep taking the medicine :rolleyes:


My friends limits is telling me about the lovely "Birds" they met in the pub. I know! I have a boreing life! Will you be my friend!

IvySlayer

You're referring to dark horses, I know quite a few.

Mossy Monk

One guy tried to convince everyone he won the lottery. His great pretense lasted for all of the 3 seconds it took to announce his news.

SoWatchaWant

Yeah, I've got a friend like that! Always telling me about the women he's pulled and that have been flirting with him, the only thing he can pull is his plumb when he gets home!

Can I have your dealers number ?

antodeco

Legendary friends or complete liars/knobjockeys?

My cats breath smells of cat food

Elliemental

I think the worst I've heard so far is off one chap who informed me that he had a professional contract as a back-up drummer for various bands, such as Pantera, the Blizzards etc. And apparently these bands needed backup drummers a LOT, leading him to playing many massive gigs around the country. And the worst part about it all was me believing him due to him actually being a decent enough drummer - but needless to say, I wound up looking like some twat when telling my mates about him. The truth behind his antics of course became a little more plain to see (**** you they weren't plain enough already) after he started changing his msn pictures to photo's of guys that look a little like him, but with extremely long hair - and began telling everyone that it was him a few years back.

And you believed him? Thats` classic bull****!

El Weirdo

Great. Sounds like there might be a bit of acid floating around for the next few weeks...

Sanjuro

I know a guy who told us he wrote the song So What by the Anti-Nowhere League and that Metallica stole it from him. He played us his 'demo' which ended up being a song we saw played at a gig on television. The guy was in the corner giggling. And he told us his grandmother 'dated' Hitler. His lies get more and more outrageous, and it's just fun watching spin a lie.

big_show

Tellox wrote: »

such as Pantera, the Blizzards etc. And apparently these bands needed backup drummers a LOT,

Take a picture this is the only time your ever going to see pantera and the blizzards beside each other.

Wurly

Deleted User wrote: »

i think i am going to have a scrambled egg for breakfast and maybe some soup and bread a little later on.

Are you gonna have toast with the scrambled egg?

That sounds lovely.

pickarooney

I'm still looking for the 'absolute bull**** you got your gullible mates to believe' thread that spawned this.

120_Minutes

for those about to post tl,dr i'll summerise:

dude has bull**** artist "friends", in fact dude is probably one himself.

dimejinky99

In fairness to the OP, we've all met those lads who feel they have to tell these stories in order to make themselves look cool and the bull**** detector usually goes off seconds into whatever story it is. I never call them on it though. It's insecurity and lonliness makes them do this and you hafta feel bad for them that they feel the need to carry on like that.

K-Ren

Our art class at school was full of seriously cool guys getting chased by Gardai helicopters on a weekly basis. Why do we feel the need to humour these people?

Professey Chin

I once ran for congress and won!!!
Whateva!I do what I want!

BroomBurner

dimejinky99 wrote: »

In fairness to the OP, we've all met those lads who feel they have to tell these stories in order to make themselves look cool and the bull**** detector usually goes off seconds into whatever story it is. I never call them on it though. It's insecurity and lonliness makes them do this and you hafta feel bad for them that they feel the need to carry on like that.

That's a relative of mine all over. Think we humour them out of fear of their fragile state of mind.

peanuthead

My dad shocked me one night, I'll never forget it. I went to the pub to meet him for a few drinks. He hardly ever drinks, but when he does - he does!

Well, he's a right auld gobshite when he's drinking - he came home from the local one night telling us he had been up there with Madonna and Will Smith lol, of course we believed him we were like 7!!

Well I went into the pub to meet him, sittin there having a drink with him when this guy calls him by name, and pulls out a demo cd from his pocket. Without faltering my dad takes it off him, and says "I'll pass it on to himself for you and I'll let you know if he likes it"

Don't know who himself was - and I was too shocked to even contemplate asking.

Poor guy's still waiting on that call ...

Tellox

Sorry, no acid. 9am, and typing on boards looks like work to your boss from far away. And I just ****ing love hearing myself type.

@dime: agreed, in a huge way. Which unfortunately makes it a bit hard for me to call their bull****, out of not wanting to make them feel even worse.

Jaeger 90

Once had a lad in our office, extremely boring, not massively quiet but not a huge talker either, nothing to make you suspect he was a wierdo.

anyways he was in the habit of driving around various towns at night finding women and raping them, once on a worknight out saw his car driving slow and said to ourselves 'hey, theres dave (real name) lets go over to him', as we approached we seen him try dragging a young girl into his car.

long story short work mates grabbed and restrained him, he confessed it all, usual blah balh 'im sick' need help etc, was given an ultimatum to turn himself in or we would, he never showed up to work again and dont know if they did turn him in, goes to show most people dont actually give a shit an are just motivated by booze probably.

I didnt actually care that much in the first place though, I was in it just for the fun of restraining someone and tryin to impress some of the hot chicks in the office.:pac:

Jaeger 90

Jaeger 90 wrote: »

Once had a lad in our office, extremely boring, not massively quiet but not a huge talker either, nothing to make you suspect he was a wierdo.

anyways he was in the habit of driving around various towns at night finding women and raping them, once on a worknight out saw his car driving slow and said to ourselves 'hey, theres dave (real name) lets go over to him', as we approached we seen him try dragging a young girl into his car.

long story short work mates grabbed and restrained him, he confessed it all, usual blah balh 'im sick' need help etc, was given an ultimatum to turn himself in or we would, he never showed up to work again and dont know if they did turn him in, goes to show most people dont actually give a shit an are just motivated by booze probably.

I didnt actually care that much in the first place though, I was in it just for the fun of restraining someone and tryin to impress some of the hot chicks in the office.:pac:

I think you're the type of person the OP is talking about.

My name is URL

K-Ren wrote: »

Our art class at school was full of seriously cool guys getting chased by Gardai helicopters on a weekly basis. Why do we feel the need to humour these people?

I think it's more a case of them humoring themselves tbh

I know a few people that do it, it's harmless though and I wouldn't call them out on it

rubadub

A lad in school always had mad stories, still meet him the odd time at xmas in the local pub and love hearing the bull**** stories of what he is up to. Seemed to be a compulsive liar and some lies were stupid, like he would say to me "I went to see batman in the cinema last night", and then later a mate would tell me "he actually went to see fight club", pointless lies, but he is probably going off chuffed with himself "haha the fool believed I went to batman, sucker!"

BroomBurner

Maybe he forgot the name of the film? Can happen

Azureus

I know a couple of people like this as well; always met the hot girls/were at crazy parties etc the one night nobody in the circle was around to see it
One guy in particular tho.. and anybody who knows me will know exactly who Im on about pointless lies and always trips himself up-makes for comedy gold to be honest so we never really call him on it

dsmythy

What does all this talk of liars have to do with dark horses?

BrianD3

I knew one in college. Decent enough fella, academically very good but nerdy and the biggest bullsh1tter I've ever come across. A Walter Mitty type. Most of his stories were to do with extreme feats of athleticism, strength, martial arts, military stuff, mayhem etc. Ridiculous bullsh1t stories every day in college for several years. He regularly had stories of getting mugged and fighting off multiple attackers, breaking people's arms, throwing them through shop windows or over bridges etc. He had made bombs and damaged property with them to take revenge on people. He had done everything in the Anarchist's Cookbook and it all worked. He made Napalm light bulbs etc. and again used them to damage property.

Basically he was like a cross between Bruce Lee, Ba Baracus and MacGyver.

He was never challenged on his bullsh1t. At the start it wasn't too bad but it got more and more ridiculous as time went on. Meanwhile people were pissing themselves laughing at him behind his back. It became a source of entertainment. Poor fella.

tman

Tellox wrote: »

And finally, a bit of a sadder one; there's a guy who I used to work with who was of the honest opinion that everyone in the office thought he was amazing based off his WoW gear. Regardless of the fact that the vast majority of people he worked with did not play WoW. He came into work, recounting tales of staying up all night and single-handedly beating 40-man level 60 (or whatever the level cap is now) instances in order to get the best gear; to back up his important stories in reality, he spent around 80% of his paycheque (from a fulltime job) on buying WoW Gold. Every week. What truly saddened me about this story is that other stories you would hear usually involve sex, money or being talented. This man instead choose to tell us about virtual money and clothes; and spent his real money to back his stories up.

That just doesn't make sense at all... Having ****loads of gold would still only allow you to buy BOE gear. You have to put time and effort in to get the decent stuff.

MizzLolly

I'd a friend who told everyone a few years back that I'd ran away. She came into school saying I did a runner and acting all upset saying she's been lying to my mother trying to cover for me.

I hadn't run away and my mother had not come to my friend asking about my whereabouts as I'd been at home with her with an ear infection the whole time I'd supposedly 'ran away'. :rolleyes:

milehip1

Tellox wrote: »

We all have them; those mate's who are perfectly fine in their own way, maybe a good laugh to head out and have a pint with, respectable enough, and have nothing in particular wrong with them.

But when nobody's around - their absolute legendary form comes out.

That friend of yours who just has no luck with the opposite sex? Surrounded by potential mating partners, and snorting coke off their privates over the weekend. What about your shy mate who can't drive? Rallying through the backroads at 90mph while being chased by the gardaí search chopper last Monday. He had to bomb it because he was delivering half a million's worth of acid to a major crime ring. While getting a sloppy blowjob from Riley Mason. But you were off visiting your folks at the time.

I think the worst I've heard so far is off one chap who informed me that he had a professional contract as a back-up drummer for various bands, such as Pantera, the Blizzards etc. And apparently these bands needed backup drummers a LOT, leading him to playing many massive gigs around the country. And the worst part about it all was me believing him due to him actually being a decent enough drummer - but needless to say, I wound up looking like some twat when telling my mates about him. The truth behind his antics of course became a little more plain to see (**** you they weren't plain enough already) after he started changing his msn pictures to photo's of guys that look a little like him, but with extremely long hair - and began telling everyone that it was him a few years back.

Another chap I know once came out with the tale that he was attempting to kill himself by throwing himself into the river suir with a brick tied around his neck (which would not have worked too well to begin with), stated that while doing so, 3 gardaí came along and told him to step back from the river. He finished the tale by informing us that he held two of the gardaí up by the scruff of the neck (at the same time, one hand per neck), while the other guard did a runner in pure terror.

And finally, a bit of a sadder one; there's a guy who I used to work with who was of the honest opinion that everyone in the office thought he was amazing based off his WoW gear. Regardless of the fact that the vast majority of people he worked with did not play WoW. He came into work, recounting tales of staying up all night and single-handedly beating 40-man level 60 (or whatever the level cap is now) instances in order to get the best gear; to back up his important stories in reality, he spent around 80% of his paycheque (from a fulltime job) on buying WoW Gold. Every week. What truly saddened me about this story is that other stories you would hear usually involve sex, money or being talented. This man instead choose to tell us about virtual money and clothes; and spent his real money to back his stories up.

Mind, it's a shame there's not more people spending money to back things up. I wouldn't mind one of my "woman magnet" friends hiring a few decent looking prostitutes every weekend.

So, what amazing stories have you been regaled with by your otherwise average acquaintances?

So in short, you mean complusive liars, yeah?

dimejinky99

yeah it's always really macho martial arts/miltaristic 'i beat ten blokes up after they jumped on me' crap..hate that