iPhone ad lampoon game

dr gonzo

Was watching one of the ridiculous iphone ads(a phone which i think is great) but i just thought the ad could do with taking down a notch or two so i propose a new line up of strange, wild, wonderful and most important hilariously titled iphone apps coming soon to an app store near you.

Ill start:

Need a way to find your nearest prostitute...theres an app for that!

Dartz

Do they have to be real iPhone app's? Because I guarantee that no matter what odd, strange or weird thing you can think off, there's an app for something weirder.

Grinder, anyone?

minidazzler

dr gonzo wrote: »

Need a way to find your nearest prostitute...theres an app for that!

Are you sure you want everyone to be able to find yore ma so easily?

Dankoozy

when the **** will people ever stop talking about that piece of **** locked down restricted locked to Ohtue piece of **** disposable excuse for a phone with no keypad?

Go back to Facebook and Twitter, iPhone hipsters. and take your 16 euro pints from Cafe en Seine with you

paddypender

sounds like someones jealous they cant afford an iphone :rolleyes:

Dankoozy

paddypender wrote: »

sounds like someones jealous they cant afford an iphone :rolleyes:

i had one only last week, mine was unlocked + jailbroken and all. really don't understand what the fuss is about. its hugely disappointing. much prefer the Nokia E63

asdasd

its hugely disappointing. much prefer the Nokia E63

There's always one.

Dankoozy

Dankoozy wrote: »

i had one only last week, mine was unlocked + jailbroken and all. really don't understand what the fuss is about. its hugely disappointing. much prefer the Nokia E63

i literally choose not to believe you. anyone who thinks that an iphone is hugely disappointing has no grip on reality.

it does everything perfectly.

Quint

They should have an app so the screen doesn't break with the slightest knock

donkey balls

Deleted User wrote: »

i literally choose not to believe you. anyone who thinks that an iphone is hugely disappointing has no grip on reality.

it does everything perfectly.

nokia n97 pisses all over the iphone

3DataModem

"my phone's better than your phone"

translation:

"I am a jackass"

TheCardHolder

If someone is happy with their current phone why start an arguement over how yours is better?

nokia n97 pisses all over the iphone

That's a ridiculous statement to make, it's all down to a person's personal preference.

nevaeh-2die-4

dr gonzo wrote: »

Was watching one of the ridiculous iphone ads(a phone which i think is great) but i just thought the ad could do with taking down a notch or two so i propose a new line up of strange, wild, wonderful and most important hilariously titled iphone apps coming soon to an app store near you.

Ill start:

Need a way to find your nearest prostitute...theres an app for that!

need not to read gay threads like this theres an app.

donkey balls

TheCardHolder wrote: »

If someone is happy with their current phone why start an arguement over how yours is better?



That's a ridiculous statement to make, it's all down to a person's personal preference.

yeah shoudnt have said that its down to personal taste what i forgot to say was having been looking at them and asking a friend who had one they said nokia 5800/n97 better device.

also your not stuck with the one operater

Dankoozy

anyone who actually switches to Ohtue to get an iPhone is an uninformed clueless muppet of the highest order

themont85

Dankoozy wrote: »

anyone who actually switches to Ohtue to get an iPhone is an uninformed clueless muppet of the highest order

Calm down.

Dankoozy

Deleted User wrote: »

i literally choose not to believe you. anyone who thinks that an iphone is hugely disappointing has no grip on reality.

it does everything perfectly.

Lets see

Build quality - not great

"Permanent" battery - worst design ever

Virtual keyboard - ****ing annoying and no i won't get used to it

Animated effects - hugely annoying

Web browser - its ok now but in 6 months sites will be too bloated for it to load.

Threaded SMS - in no way preferable to what i have now


App store - I know where i can get better applications for free that don't need to be approved by Steve Jobs first

Itunes - horrible program to have to use. USB Mass storage ftw

Ring tone - not nearly loud enough

Jailbreaking - I should not need a hack to do what i want with my own phone (recent nokias are a bit like this too, though)

Exclusive 02 deal - anti-competitive I can't understand why busybody regulators allow this.

Email client - fairly decent, about the only thing i like

Phone application - i should not have to open a ****ing application to use my phone as a phone

Visual voicemail - the only thing better is no voicemail at all

themont85

Dankoozy wrote: »

Lets see

Build quality - not great

"Permanent" battery - worst design ever

Virtual keyboard - ****ing annoying and no i won't get used to it

Animated effects - hugely annoying

Web browser - its ok now but in 6 months sites will be too bloated for it to load.

Threaded SMS - in no way preferable to what i have now


App store - I know where i can get better applications for free that don't need to be approved by Steve Jobs first

Itunes - horrible program to have to use. USB Mass storage ftw

Ring tone - not nearly loud enough

Jailbreaking - I should not need a hack to do what i want with my own phone (recent nokias are a bit like this too, though)

Exclusive 02 deal - anti-competitive I can't understand why busybody regulators allow this.

Email client - fairly decent, about the only thing i like

Phone application - i should not have to open a ****ing application to use my phone as a phone

Visual voicemail - the only thing better is no voicemail at all

Sound like a barrell of laughs.

asdasd

Build quality - not great

Its a fantastic industrial design

"Permanent" battery - worst design ever

In general phones outlast batteries.

Virtual keyboard - ****ing annoying and no i won't get used to it

Yu'd better because every single phone in the world is going to be touch in a few years. It gives alot of screen space. And it works very well.

Animated effects - hugely annoying

Yep, lets stick to 1982.

Web browser - its ok now but in 6 months sites will be too bloated for it to load.

Stupid argument. On wifi it will be same as on a desktop. On Edge etc. it will be slower. The movement is to simpler websites.

Threaded SMS - in no way preferable to what i have now

Looks better to me. In my previous nokia I would always bump up against the 100 message limit and get a message that it was full. admittedly this was not a "smart phone" but that does not mean it had to be stupid - there was plenty of memory on the device as I never used the stupid games, or the useless camera.

Not only that but the only way to delete the oldest messages was to page back 20 pages, which took some time. So I deleted recent messages - about 10 - to free space which lasted a day or two. All of which meant I had ten new messages, and 90 old crap messages. The people who designed this are not going to design good phones, of any variety.

App store - I know where i can get better applications for free that don't need to be approved by Steve Jobs first

For what? The iPhone. Or how is Nokias store coming along. As for approval, thats a good thing in general. How many applications before the iPhone came along were unapproved on, say Nokia?

Itunes - horrible program to have to use. USB Mass storage ftw

USB mass storage on your phone. You walk around with a freaking phone connected to a hard disk tapped to your ass so you can use some primitive file system to play music. Good for you. Saner people would use the iPhone as an iPod. Since that is what it is - minus the phone functionality.

Ring tone - not nearly loud enough

They could bump that up right enough.

Jailbreaking - I should not need a hack to do what i want with my own phone (recent nokias are a bit like this too, though)

every phone is like that, cept the Android ones, and they will be. A crashing app can bring down a phone after all.

Exclusive 02 deal - anti-competitive I can't understand why busybody regulators allow this.

O2 suck. The only reason I am thinking I may not renew my iPhone.

Email client - fairly decent, about the only thing i like

Phone application - i should not have to open a ****ing application to use my phone as a phone

Riight. You have no idea how stuff works, do you? Obviously the phone app is always running, thats why you can take a call. An always running application is the same - as far as untechnical people are concerned - as something running in the system. You "launch" the contacts application to call your contacts, or show the keyboard. Same as all other phones. How else would it be done, should they keep memory for invisible UI? I presume that all phones do this. If not they waste memory as the contacts are always in memory.

Visual voicemail - the only thing better is no voicemail at all

Visual voicemail is clearly a far better mechanism of seeing who called you. As opposed to calling a number, waiting for the lady to talk, hearing that you have two messages, skipping the first, listening to the second, listening to the numbers, realising that the numbers are from an ex, and deleting the message unheard. Thats much worse than seeing hte number in a list and deleting it.

Wow. What an untechnical rant.

The most important thing about the iPhone is it's software and API. hence the better games and apps. That is where the future lies - either the iPhone, or Android. Not symbian.

Dankoozy

Dankoozy wrote: »

Lets see

Build quality - not great

"Permanent" battery - worst design ever

Virtual keyboard - ****ing annoying and no i won't get used to it

Animated effects - hugely annoying

Web browser - its ok now but in 6 months sites will be too bloated for it to load.

Threaded SMS - in no way preferable to what i have now


App store - I know where i can get better applications for free that don't need to be approved by Steve Jobs first

Itunes - horrible program to have to use. USB Mass storage ftw

Ring tone - not nearly loud enough

Jailbreaking - I should not need a hack to do what i want with my own phone (recent nokias are a bit like this too, though)

Exclusive 02 deal - anti-competitive I can't understand why busybody regulators allow this.

Email client - fairly decent, about the only thing i like

Phone application - i should not have to open a ****ing application to use my phone as a phone

Visual voicemail - the only thing better is no voicemail at all

Dankoozy wrote: »

App store - I know where i can get better applications for free that don't need to be approved by Steve Jobs first
Jailbreaking - I should not need a hack to do what i want with my own phone (recent nokias are a bit like this too, though)

These two things are what makes the itouch/iphone the best consumer product ever made that fits in your hand.

I had no laptop for 6 weeks and used my itouch exclusively for..
all my internet.. boards, facebook, youtube, gmail etc.
i still used it in the car everyday with my genius playlists. lets see your usb mass storage do that.
i had a load of games for when i was bored.
with the jailbreak, I have dtunes which lets me download torrents and I could still download from rapidshare. Nokia can do this?

I could go on and on.. I’d like to see you use your Nokia for 6 weeks as a substitute for a laptop and see how you get on.
Bear in mind, I had an itouch. If I had an iphone, it’d be even better.

and build quality not great? had mine a year and still perfect.
exclusive 02 deal? how can you mention jailbreak and this in the same post.