Confused

merlie

Hi there,

Just some background first:
Ok my long term partner broke up with me less than 2 months ago after nearly 6 years of being together. During the relationship we had discussed me moving over to England ( thats where he lives ) and also about having children.

He broke from me just recently and it hurt me very deeply and I am still not over it even though I have binned all the things that he gave me but still I see reminders of him when I am out and about or watching tv or a movie etc, which really doesn't help.

He still wanted to remain friends with me and we have been in contact. Though I have not nor has he phoned me, we now just either text, msn, or email each other. I would ring but I am afraid to, as he may not answer his phone or it would seem rather weird to him and I might find it awkward to talk to him about stuff etc, when it really shouldn't be. But it is the way I am feeling at the moment.

Now here is the thing, Yesterday, I had sent him a text and said where I was ( out with my best friend Ann and the name of the pub ), later when I got home I chatted with him on msn and he told me that he looked up the pub on google and found it ..describing the pub to me and then he asked me for photos I had taken a months ago..they are normal photos ( nothing odd or anything ) but he was asking to see them and I do not know why he wants to see them..and I did ask but I got no response to my question...and he did ask me about 3 times ( I have crappy internet service at the mo as it logs me out from time to time ) so he may have thought I was not getting his messages.

The thing is, I don't consider it to be normal behaviour of a 'friend' and I am not really sure what he is thinking. I used to not now..its all strange. And his texts later were all smiley smiley and today I only heard from him when I texted him, he has been quiet today bar the one text message. So I really confused by his actions and
I am wondering if you can pin point what you think about his behaviour.

Thank you so much for your replies.

Kind regards

Merlie

Lucyx

Hi Merlie

Well looking up the pub on google would suggest to me he still has feelings for you as he wouldn't waste his time doing this otherwise. But we need more info on the photos, are you and him in them together or who is in them?

The coolness then with the texts could be him back tracking (if he thought that he went too far with the whole goggle pub thing) and trying to keep his distance. can you say why you guys broke up ? who normally initiates the texts? (be honest:))

merlie

Lucyx wrote: »

Hi Merlie

Well looking up the pub on google would suggest to me he still has feelings for you as he wouldn't waste his time doing this otherwise. But we need more info on the photos, are you and him in them together or who is in them?

The coolness then with the texts could be him back tracking (if he thought that he went too far with the whole goggle pub thing) and trying to keep his distance. can you say why you guys broke up ? who normally initiates the texts? (be honest:))

Hi Lucy,

Thanks for your reply. The photos he wants to see are ones of me and of when I went down to Wicklow, also Bray and a few other places. No they are not of me and him or him. He said he still wanted to see them. But to me it makes no sense when I am not involved with him any more. It has left me confused.

As to why we broke up, well he wanted to break from me for 2 reasons, one it had been the fact that we couldn't get to see each other as often as we wanted to and ( in his own words, 'I want to see other people'.

As to who initiates the texts it is sometimes me and sometimes him.

Today as I have said it has been only one text. I did go on msn but he was not there. He has been very quiet today. In the one text he told me that he was making chilli and hoped I was good. ( He likes cooking )

But I am really trying hard to understand his actions and what he is thinking. Just that him checking out the pub online is a bit far in my mind for someone who is supposed to be a ' friend.'

LegacyUser

Hi Op,

Sounds like you really have to understand that it takes time to build a friendship back after all that has happened between you two, but it does sound like he does have feelings for you as Lucy pointed out, and maybe taking time out from the relationship to see what will happen. It maybe that the distance did not help and if he realises what he wants, he may just come back to you. I mean no friend would look up a pub that you were in on google if they were not interested in you. You may have a chance to get back with him even though he may have closed the road to you.

Just take your time and see what happens. Keep in contact and be his friend. You never know something good might happen for you with him.

Best of luck