The 20,000 Club!

Basq

Christ, I've wasted my life!

Today (..well actually yesterday but only realised today), I join the club of posters who infamously have posted over 20,000 posts on Boards.ie - other posters include Tar.Aldarion, Ruu, Victor, mike65, Thaedydal, Roy Keane, Lorraine Keane, Erik Estrada, Hitler and Dick Moran from Glenroe.

What have I learned 20,000 posts on:

• If I regularly posted in AH, I would have hit 20,000 a long time ago.
• All of my Bargain Alerts have saved Boardsie's the gross national expenditure for Iceland for the years 2001 - 2008.
• I posted a total of 3000 Bargain Alerts and have been thanked just twice!
• AlmightyCushion is not in fact a cushion.. sure he has attributes that resemble a cushion.. but he is in fact a pillow!
• Ruu is not simply a robot.. he is in fact cybernetic organisim. Living tissue over metal endo-skeleton. Created by Skynet, commonly used in human assassination missions. Can be reprogrammed to protect humans. Come in different models - ex. T-1. T-600, T-800, T-850, T-1000, T-X. Ruu is a cyborg, like Robocop, but unlike Robocop, Ruu is not gay and wussy.
• The Music Forum is visited one every two years with a request for legal links to copyrighted illegal content.
• mike65 can't actually drive.. he's a helluva Segway-er though. Pic of Mike taken last weekend: http://hastyruminations.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/segway11.jpg
• javaboy is not a fan of coffee or programming languages. He's actually a terrible speller and thought he was calling himself "ChavaBoy" because he's proud of his well-established happy-slapping records. 40 grannys happy-slapped in 14 seconds - only 12 of them died!
• Sharpshooter got her name from her weekend course in sniper-rifle training in which she shot 7 rabbits, 4 cans, 2 humans including and Ruu (but Ruu was grand.. although he did kill another 12 rabbits in utter rage!).
• Terry got his name after his fascination with Chocolate Oranges. He had a short stint replacing Dawn French in adverts for the product but Dawn French didn't take the news well and ate his entire family. Terry gave back the role to Dawn French, but he still recieves death threats from her (the death threats also contain free Vicar Of Dibley DVD's - Terry is unsure which to be most scared of).
• Tar.Aldarion is neither male or female, and is now known as Lady TarTar. At a recent Boards Beers on stage, (s)he exposed his/her "wenis" after getting off a motorbike. (S)he issued a statement telling everyone (s)he was proud of his "wenis" and said it was a decent size.
• Rabies hasn't told anyone yet, but is looking for a new modern username. Suggestions including "Swine Flu", "Knob Rot" and "Dennis" have been suggested, but shot-down by "Rabies The Rabid Rabbit The 2nd"!
• dr.bollocko is not a recognised doctor by the Irish Doctors Environmental Association.. but he is in fact a Timelord. But he did in fact kill Hitler, Fred & Rose West, Dr Zhivago and Dr. Kevorkian (cos he was stealing his thunder!).
• Monty - the one and only hasn't posted on Boards in over 2 weeks so his account will soon be deleted due to inactivity, his moderator status will be removed, his pets will be tracked down and killed, he will need to contact a cranky old Gene Hackman to try and uncover the corruption and betrayal around the murder of a US Senator. He has famously uttered the line "I have got to get me one of these!" at least one every 17 seconds.
• Karl Hungus can't actually play any instruments bar the triangle. He has a long and healthy career with the Barrytown Philharmonic in which he was called the next Phil Collins. He's also a big fan of Country & Western.
• monkeyfudge's pet monkey Darwin has actually been dead for 5 years but props him up every so often a la 'Weekend at Bernies' - he has approached Paramount with the idea of a sequel. Paramount is yet to return his calls.. but monkeyfudge and Darwin lives in hope. Well, monkeyfudge does anyways!
• (added @ 11:18 on Sept 17) MagicMarker has an inability to read anything longer than 2 sentences, sorta like yer man in Memento. He started scrawling "witty" comments on his skin that he can retort with if this does happen. He didn't have a pen to hand, so had to use feces.

So, what will the next 20,000 posts have in store.. I have no doubt one or more of the following will come up:

• Brian Cohen's inability to digest dairy products
• Pat Kenny'a glorious under-water world off the coast of Galway
• Swine Flu was just a normal flu.. but with more salt!
• Josef Fritzl's "Father Of The Year 2010" Award
• Which of the Seoige sisters is a robot again?
• Hot TV babes / hot Irish TV babes / hot International babes / hot babes with less than 2 limbs / hot babes who looks like kitchen utensils
• Roma Gypsies - ah sure they're not all bad!

Jesus Wept

All credit to Roy Keane, at the end of the day.

minidazzler

All the cool kids have between 1 and 4 thousand posts.

Rabies

/puts in request for Knob Rot user name

BlueSpiral

I can't believe I've been a member here so long and still have under 500 posts. :pac:

MagicMarker

tl;dr

Postcount +1

Basq

BlueSpiral wrote: »

I can't believe I've been a member here so long and still have under 500 posts. :pac:

Ahh.. but you haven't been (willingly) chained to a desk, and been thrown fish-heads regularly, and been forced to go to the toilet in a paper hat

It's a pain and procedure I know so well!

dr.bollocko

A clever gambit to include the AH Mods in your OP so this wasn't moved to tCN or your posts didn't magically start disappearing.

Sharpshooter

I'd better not post in this one.

Rabies

dr.bollocko wrote: »

A clever gambit to include the AH Mods in your OP so this wasn't moved to tCN or your posts didn't magically start disappearing.

but he forgot you

nah nah

Dravokivich

BlueSpiral wrote: »

I can't believe I've been a member here so long and still have under 500 posts. :pac:

Longer then you and less then you! :pac:

- Drav!

dr.bollocko

Rabies wrote: »

but he forgot you

nah nah

dr.bollocko is not a recognised doctor by the Irish Doctors Environmental Association.. but he is in fact a Timelord. But he did in fact kill Hitler, Fred & Rose West, Dr Zhivago and Dr. Kevorkian (cos he was stealing his thunder!).

You only scanned it looking for your own name. Admit it!

BlueSpiral

Dravokivich wrote: »

Longer then you and less then you! :pac:

- Drav!

Son of a-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cfLDf5hiNqI

Rabies

dr.bollocko wrote: »

You only scanned it looking for your own name. Admit it!

http://achristian.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/sad_smiley_face.jpg

No... er... maybe...



fvck it!! ya i did

pablomakaveli

You've averaged around 4,000 posts a year. Do you live here or something?

Jesus Wept

That's sbout 10 per day, how long did it take you to write that line pablo? :P

pablomakaveli

The-Rigger wrote: »

That's sbout 10 per day, how long did it take you to write that line pablo? :P

42 minutes. I'm severly dyslexic.

smythwicks

pablomakaveli wrote: »

42 minutes. I'm severly dyslexic.

but you can spell dyslexic :pac:

Jesus Wept

pablomakaveli wrote: »

42 minutes. I'm severly dyslexic.

You'd have your 10 posts per day completed in 7 short hours leaving you a further....

24
-7
---
17

... 17 hours to do with whatever you please.