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What happens now?

  • 23-08-2009 12:04am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I dunno how to describe this really. Lets just say that Im young with a baby and my husband died. I didnt expect it and we were happy. I am completely in denial. At the moment I am busy doing the practical stuff but I cant cry like I need to. Theres no point in talking because its all been said. What happens now?


Comments

  • #2
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Sorry that you've lost someone that you loved. Someone that was special in your life.


  • #3
    Overheal
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 86,729 ✭✭✭✭Overheal


    In practical terms? You raise your child and move along.

    In actual terms your brain's protecting yourself by running on autopilot. Routine takes over for a while. How long is up to you. When my stepmom died I found it hard to grieve and I desperately just wanted to go back to work. This was right around christmas and it was our busiest time at work and I had a very repetitive bartending job - that was nice. But then it subsides and the grief will crep in eventually. Possibly even sneak up on you. Did for me anyway. For some other people it hits them like a train one day. Sometimes weeks after the facts.

    Take it one step at a time. I would however reccomend having been in the situation previously, that you should go ahead and schedule an hour with a counselor sometime in the next few weeks. Wether you feel the need to talk to one wont really matter. More often than not I have done more listening in those kind of sessions than speaking.


  • #4
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    I'm so sorry for your loss. A friend of mine was in this situation a few years ago and it's not easy. She over compensated for her grief by putting on this extremely happy front for people, which I think was wrong. Let your friends/family know if you're not feeling up to dealing with things and dont pretend you're coping if you're not. People will understand & help. You will get through this, even if it seems now that you wont. Try a counsellor if you find it hard to talk to people close to you. Best of luck.


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