God Bless You (Poem)

Grievous

I don't write much poetry anymore, This is something I have found in one of my old hidden journals, I wrote it in french first so nobody in my house could figure out what it said(unless they got a dictionary!), Because I was a very shy and private person when i was 18 (7 years ago).

But here it is.

God bless you

The man shrivels in the corner with fear and the cold harsh weather
People walk by him speedily not even noticing his presence and undesired position in life

He can’t live his life because he has nowhere to live; he exists as a scourge to all the unforgiving happy secure people who pass him in the streets daily.

His dignity and self-esteem are low
His house and money are gone
His friends and family have disappeared
Some decent souls drop some change into his plastic fast-food cup
And receive a “God bless you” in return.
But will the same people return?

Day becomes night and hits him with a bite
He finds a crevice to sleep in for the night
To wake up to the same routine the next day
With a fright!

pickarooney

Can you post it in French too?

Grievous

pickarooney wrote: »

Can you post it in French too?

If I have time later I will transcribe my notes onto a word document and upload it.

Do you speak french?

Any comments on the piece intself so far?

pickarooney

The first lines don't really scan - they read like prose. The last stanza seems contrived to force rhyming, so I'd like to see the original for that reason.

reality

If it contained more punctuation, I think I'd find it easier to read. Interesting subject though.