Friend seems to be depressed

LegacyUser

I have a friend who I'm worried is depressed, but how can you tell if it's depression or just a period of bad moods? She is going into 6th year and has always been quite high-strung and finds it difficult to cope with stress (or stressful situations), but was always happy most of the time.

In the past few months things seem to have changed dramatically. She spends a lot of time in her house alone and just wants to be alone all the time. She said she never feels like going out with our friends, then forces herself to, but never has a good time so doesn't see the point anymore. She rarely replies to texts and because of this many people have stopped texting her. She also said recently that she feels like she has no friends anymore and doesn't deserve any.

Many people have taken this as being pushed away and have fallen out of contact with her, but I feel that she is deeply unhappy and needs her friends now more than ever. She does well in school but it can sometimes get on top of her and she doesn't cope well in those situations. Going into the LC year, she has said she's not going to do it (in a joking way) but I do worry that the stress of the year will make things worse.

She just seems to feel very unhappy and I really want to do something to help. She can be quite volatile in her reactions and I'm worried about approaching the subject with her. Any advice is greatly appreciated.

AckwelFoley

Shes lucky she has a friend that cares.

This is a tough one for a few reasons, shes young, and young people have hormones and are moody at the best of time, and shes in 6th year, easily the worst experience anybody will ever face!

I wouldnt approach her yet about it, dont get in her face about it just now, just if you can take the moodyness and what comes with it accept it for now and try and get her to open up to you.

Novella

It's really great that you are so concerned and your friend is really lucky to have you. I'm sure she'll realise that one day and thank you.

In the meantime, keep an eye on her. 6th year is a hard time for most students so just keep her in the loop, keep texting her and things so she doesn't feel left out, even if she doesn't reply to you.

I think the fact that you say she's been like this for a few months now might indicate that it's not just due to school pressures as she hasn't been in 6th year yet so maybe there is another underlying issue?

Anyway, see how things go for another little while. You still have a month of summer holidays left so try get her out and doing things, might cheer her up a bit and you could drop into conversation "It's great seeing you out again, you been ok?" or something to that effect. If she really isn't interested in doing anything at all, perhaps call over to her for a chat before doing anything more serious like discussing it with her parents, or even your own parents.

Good luck, hope things turn out ok.

Overheal

Novella wrote: »

might cheer her up a bit and you could drop into conversation "It's great seeing you out again, you been ok?" or something to that effect. .

I think thats a good idea. Its always nicer to hear a "Hey! We missed you! etc." especially from someone you weren't expecting to say it at all. I was in the girls situation in my first year of college - I nearly failed and completely isolated myself for the most part. But then I pushed myself beyond the envelope and passed. And come september everyone that I thought had written me off was very warm and welcoming. That will but a huge spring in your step.