Living on the breadline - money problems

LegacyUser

I'm having a really difficult time financially, it's causing me so much stress and I'm just wondering are other people living as I am.

I'm working but earning very average money. I have no savings or emergency money of any sort. I used to have but used it all as a house deposit a few years ago. Now I live payday to payday. This week almost all of my money went on car insurance. I didn't even pay the full amount, just the 30% deposit required upfront for people who pay monthly.

That plus a loan repayment leaves me with zero cash for the week, not even money to buy food so I took an extra €20 from the ATM before the standing order for the loan goes out tomorrow which will make my account overdrawn and I'll probably get charged a fee for that but I have to eat. That €20 literally has to last me until next Thursday.

Can't use credit card because it's at it's limit, which is thankfully only €400 and not €4000. I should be able to pay that again in a few weeks.

I've already made excuses about why I can't meet people, etc this week. I lied about having other plans but the truth is I can't meet them because my budget this week will barely feed me. It won't cover coffee shop meals or trips to the cinema. I filled the car with petrol last week so I can go to my dad's house for the weekend where I won't be spending anything. I won't be able to bring anything though, usually I would bring some groceries, a cake, some dog food for his dogs so I'll lie and say I had no time to go shopping. I won't tell the truth because he has his own problems and I don't want him worrying about me. He knows I don't have much money but doesn't know it's this bad.

Thankfully I don't smoke, very rarely drink so my personal expenses aren't that high but this situation gets me down. I haven't been on holidays in 3 years. I only buy clothes in sales.

Are things this tight with other people? I've heard a few people talk about having trouble with the college registration fees. Almost everything I earn goes on mortgage and bills and it seems to be getting worse every month. My bills are as low as they could possibly be, certainly no SKY sports or movies, no landline just a mobile, Bord Gais electricity...

So what I'm asking is when people complain about money being tight or being broke what exactly does that mean? Is it as bad as my €20 until next Thursday situation?

I have a friend who's unemployed. She has no expenses like me so almost all of her dole money is disposable income. I'm so jealous of her this week. If she was working she still wouldn't have all these bills and expenses. Sometimes I wish I hadn't taken on the house and all of the responsibility that comes with it.

Anyone else in this situation?

hungryhippo

Plenty of people in the same boat and far worse. There are always ways to improve the situation. Do you live alone? Could you rent out the house and get a room in a houseshare somewhere for a year? Could you rent out a room or two? Could you move back in with your folks? You could build up a bit of savings by doing any of these things.

LegacyUser

Yes other people are in that situation. There is an excellent Irish site which deals with financial issues called askaboutmoney.com I think you should get on to it and you will learn alot. There is a specific section if you want an evaluation on your money/budget called money makeover.
Try it out. Is there any possibility that you could rent a room in your house so as to bring in a little extra cash, or get a part time job evening babysitting for a few hrs.

speaktofrank

Could you move back with your Dad for a while and rent the house out? Say for a year or two, use some of the rent money to buy groceries and stuff for your Dad as you said he has his problems too. If he is by himself I am sure he won't mind the company.

You need to move fast though as the new college year will be starting soon so people will be looking for accomodation once the Leaving cert results are out (this month)

shellyboo

Yup, lots of people in that same situation - I live payday to payday too, and am pretty much always tight or stuck for money. I'm just completely crap with it, though.

Be thankful you have the money to may the mortgage and the car insurance! If your social life is all that has to take a hit, then that's not a big deal.

SueWho

+1 for the Money Makeover on www.askaboutmoney.com The folks there have really great ideas on how to get on your feet again with money.

You have a job and you are able to make your mortgage repayments- that is really really great. I am being very sincere here. Do the Money Makeover thing and you'll get some great ideas like ways to bring in more income, ways to get the best deal on all the bills and debts you have to pay.

Nevyn

Do you really need the car?
If you can not make ends meet with your jour current job then take on some other type of work in the evenings or the weekend until things improve.

LegacyUser

I am in a similar, if not worse situation.

I live payday to payday too but each month, the mortgage gets paid, the creche gets paid..the bills get paid, I buy 100 worth of shopping, petrol AND I have myself and my 5yr old to feed. I spend most of the month 'calling into' friends at tea-time in the hope that we'll get something to eat and therby save the bit of food we have left at home, for another day. Other people do know my predicament but short of someone GIVING me a few grand to get out of this hole, I'm not sure what to do. I try to stay positive and look at the roof over our heads and am thankful that I have a job..but I lost my original job late last year and took a new (permanent thank god) job this year on a lot less salary. So apart from the levies we've all experienced, I'm down alot of money each month. By the 2nd of each month, I'm always in tears wondering how I'm going to manage for another 28 days.....I've been on that askaboutmoney site and it's great - but there is unfortunately, no way out of this for me..for now anyway. Nothing is forever OP. Keep reminding yourself of that. Nothing is forever..things will change..this recession will turn around and we'll hopefully all appreciate our lives a bit more, having spent these few years struggling.

Hey there,

Thankfully most of our money problems have gone away and we are doing now quite well together here, but I feel your pain all the same.

There are many things you can do both small and big, but none of which I can give advise on based on this post you have made.

Firstly, do you really need a car? Yes I know that travel to work is awkward without one, but I got into learning a foreign language while on buses and although it took me two buses to get to work, it meant I could sleep in because my breakfast was pre-prepared and I was able to sit on the bus and eat and learn. So I got extra minutes in bed, extra knowledge in my head, and I saved a fortune doing it too. Not to mention that you can claim tax back on bus travel too.

There are a lot of people mortified at even beginning to THINK about life with no car, but it is one of those things that is more a deeply ingrained feeling that once they get passed the initial horror actually turns out being either ok, or in my case, brilliant.

Do you live alone? If so is there potential to sublet a room in your house? Get a lodger. Not only do you get the rent, but you can also share bills AND food costs with them and share duties. So you get more time to yourself as you only cook every second night for each other. Cooking for two is cheaper than for one and takes the exact same amount of time.

puglover

God I'm exactly the same, its so stressful and can be soul destroying if you let it be. I just try my best to do cheap/free activities at the weekend and forget about it.

My job is looking like it might go in a couple of weeks though and I am in serious ****e if it does. I won't even be able to cover the mortgage and car loan on the dole so I am really really worrying, and despite being an athiest I'm praying some miracle occurs and my job is saved....

LegacyUser

Hi guys, thanks for the replies. Everyone's suggesting I rent a room, that would be an absolute last option to be honest, I like living alone, I spent years renting before buying and hated it. My house is rather oldfashioned too (no money for improvements) and the area I live in has lots of modern apartments for rent.

I would do an evening job but in the "current economic climate" there isn't much need for extra staff.

Most of the time I can afford the car, it's just this month that's really expensive for me. April was like this too.

Askaboutmoney is excellent for advice but won't generate extra money unfortunately.

shellyboo

OP here wrote: »

Askaboutmoney is excellent for advice but won't generate extra money unfortunately.

No, but you're really not that badly off, OP. Really you're not. You're getting by... plenty of us are in the same situation.

retenzo12

well to be honest you cant have your cake and eat it.. You need to be more flexible.. A. Get rid of the car or even downsize if its a big car and/or B. Rent the room out in the house. Im sure there are alot of people who havent got these lifelines and would be glad of them.

LegacyUser

Have to agree with shellyboo...think yourself lucky that you are not in my predicament and on a similar salary but also have to feed a child...

LegacyUser

You are both right but living like this is depressing, stressful and isolating, not just for me but everyone else in the same situation. It's difficult to feel thankful for such a low quality of life.

LegacyUser

What do you mean by a fairly average wage?

shellyboo

Unregistered wrote: »

You are both right but living like this is depressing, stressful and isolating, not just for me but everyone else in the same situation. It's difficult to feel thankful for such a low quality of life.

You just sound like you're wallowing a bit, OP. Like, boohoo, you can't go to the cinema or buy lunch out anymore. So what? Yeah, it's depressing, but that's the way things are right now. If you want to change things, change things - but you can't magically be better off without making some sacrifices.

Also, low quality of life? Give me a break. You own your own home, and car, and you have a father who'll feed you for a weekend. That's plenty f things to be thankful for. I rent, don't have a car and my parents live a 4-hour bus ride away. I can't go scab off them for a weekend if I'm skint.

puglover

Hang tough OP, sometimes it just gets on top of you. Happens to us all. BUt just remember it's temporary. You'll pay off the loan/mortgage eventually. Your insurance will come down next year. You might even be lucky enough to get a promotion/raise.

It'll get better and i'm sure next month will be a little easier...

Kidchameleon

Hi OP,

Your not alone, my life is an exact carbon copy of what you described in your first post. Its depressing, the only thing that gets me through the days is the hope that somthing will improve for me. I feel trapped. What is a holiday?

Regards.

beggars_bush

what about taking the child out of the creche and finding a childminder or a stay at home parent who might be minding children??

creches and playschools charge far too much and the kids would fair just as well out of them

puglover

shellyboo wrote: »

You just sound like you're wallowing a bit, OP. Like, boohoo, you can't go to the cinema or buy lunch out anymore. So what? Yeah, it's depressing, but that's the way things are right now. If you want to change things, change things - but you can't magically be better off without making some sacrifices.

Also, low quality of life? Give me a break. You own your own home, and car, and you have a father who'll feed you for a weekend. That's plenty f things to be thankful for. I rent, don't have a car and my parents live a 4-hour bus ride away. I can't go scab off them for a weekend if I'm skint.

When you get yourself a mortgage and all the crap that goes along with it, then you'll be in a position to comment. Tenants have it so much easier than they know.

shellyboo

puglover wrote: »

When you get yourself a mortgage and all the crap that goes along with it, then you'll be in a position to comment. Tenants have it so much easier than they know.

Fair enough. But his complaint is, "I have just enough money to live on". Hardly a big deal. He's not actually in financial trouble, he just can't go out as much as he'd like.

Well, join the club like. Welcome to Ireland in 2009.

puglover

shellyboo wrote: »

Fair enough. But his complaint is, "I have just enough money to live on". Hardly a big deal. He's not actually in financial trouble, he just can't go out as much as he'd like.

Well, join the club like. Welcome to Ireland in 2009.

Ok Shellyboo, you are renting. You probably live with 1 or 2 people, never go to long without a bit of company even if you can't afford to go out, will be someone around at some point. Shared bills, rent wouldn't be half or even quarter what this guy is paying in his mortgage.

He on the otherhand, has paid his bills for the month, actually spent more than he had and still has a pittance to get some food. basically he can't even afford to meet his friends for a coffee this month, he's going to be stuck at home lonely and depressed, probably too ashamed to admit it to his friends because lets face it, it's embarrassing (ever remember that episode of Friends).

It's a crap position to be in, he is having a tough month and he is entitled to feel a bit down about it and to feel sorry for himself for abit.

shellyboo

puglover wrote: »

Ok Shellyboo, you are renting. You probably live with 1 or 2 people, never go to long without a bit of company even if you can't afford to go out, will be someone around at some point. Shared bills, rent wouldn't be half or even quarter what this guy is paying in his mortgage.

He on the otherhand, has paid his bills for the month, actually spent more than he had and still has a pittance to get some food. basically he can't even afford to meet his friends for a coffee this month, he's going to be stuck at home lonely and depressed, probably too ashamed to admit it to his friends because lets face it, it's embarrassing (ever remember that episode of Friends).

It's a crap position to be in, he is having a tough month and he is entitled to feel a bit down about it and to feel sorry for himself for abit.

He chooses to live alone - chooses to, he says he doesn't want to live with anyone. Refuses to rent out a room to get himself some more money and extra cash on top of that.

Also, the bit I've bolded is me and many, many other people most months. If he's that lonely, invite them round for tea and get them to bring the biscuits.

AARRRGH

OP here wrote: »

Hi guys, thanks for the replies. Everyone's suggesting I rent a room, that would be an absolute last option to be honest, I like living alone, I spent years renting before buying and hated it. My house is rather oldfashioned too (no money for improvements) and the area I live in has lots of modern apartments for rent.

I would do an evening job but in the "current economic climate" there isn't much need for extra staff.

Most of the time I can afford the car, it's just this month that's really expensive for me. April was like this too.

Askaboutmoney is excellent for advice but won't generate extra money unfortunately.

You need to stop being so negative:

• You don't want to rent out a room
• You won't find a part-time job
• You won't ask for help on askaboutmoney

You need to stop playing the victim and get your life together.

Work out a plan as to how you can get a better job - whether this means being more political in work, getting a better education, or simply moving job.

Figure out a way to reduce your outgoings. This means making a budget so you can see where every penny is going. No doubt you'll be able to make some savings.

Could you sell your house? You say you bought a few years ago - perhaps it's not in negative equity yet.

There are part-time jobs out there. Have a look at http://www.parttimejobs.ie. Also, ring every takeaway, tesco, etc. in your area and see if they are looking for anyone to work evenings or weekends.

And rent out a room. Even if there is a lot of competition in the area, make the rent cheaper. A few extra hundred euro per month will vastly improve your quality of life. And you can pick who you live with - a bit of eye candy might help too.

Seriously, don't be a victim, take control of your life and sort out your problems.

LegacyUser

OP here wrote: »

Hi guys, thanks for the replies. Everyone's suggesting I rent a room, that would be an absolute last option to be honest, I like living alone, I spent years renting before buying and hated it. My house is rather oldfashioned too (no money for improvements) and the area I live in has lots of modern apartments for rent.

I would do an evening job but in the "current economic climate" there isn't much need for extra staff.

Most of the time I can afford the car, it's just this month that's really expensive for me. April was like this too.

Askaboutmoney is excellent for advice but won't generate extra money unfortunately.

While I understand about not wanting to live with someone - I'd hate it - you can't have it both ways. It's easy to come up with loads of reasons not to do the things that could help you in this situation. If you wanted you could easily rent out a room - regardless of what else in on offer in the area. Drop the price - you don't need the rent to cover your mortgage just your own disposable income, so even just a couple of hundred a month will make a difference. Make it clear it's just for, say, 6 months, then you can reassess,

I think in situations like this its all about your perception on things - I can't remember the last time I went on a night out, but for me, knowing I am paying off MY mortgage makes it worthwhile.

I can't recommend the Money Makeover on AAM enough. Getting an outside perspective on the actual figures can be really useful. Even just the process of filling it out is helpful. Now that you have paid one of your big expenses (car insurance) you should consider putting a small bit aside each month for it next year or you will find yourself feeling like this next August, wondering why nothing has changed.

iguana

Here's the part you won't want to hear. You are going to need to re-examine your finances completely. Save money every way you can, get some savings together and eliminate your debts as fast as possible. Interest rates are currently phenomenally low. They will go up. If not in the next year, it will be the year after. The government has been hinting at the introduction of a property tax and the elimination of mortgage interest relief. There is also a very, very strong possibility of the introduction of water rates. Your outgoings will rise over the next few years, so prepare now while you have a chance. It sucks, but it will suck more if you bury your head in the sand instead of preparing yourself.

Eliminate everything which is unnecessary from your expenditure and work out ways to save on the things you need. As far as food is concerned, look at where you are buying from, can you buy cheaper brands? Would you save by going to a butchers/greengrocers rather than the supermarket? €20 is more than enough to eat for a week with. Something like a big shepherds pie/stew/casserole can be made for well under €5 and you'll get 4/6 main meals from that. If needs be, cut back on meat as that's the most expensive part of our diet and we don't need anything like as much as we tend to eat, meat twice a week will meet our nutritional needs. Look for special offers and damaged/near sell-by-date products in supermarkets. Make a list of the food you need for the week and don't buy lots of extras unless they are really, really good value.

Shop for clothes in Penneys, Oxfam, Barnardos etc. When you need to buy appliances get on gumtree and ebay. Enjoy free things, go for walks in the woods, suggest picnics to your friends. Join your local library. So you can't afford to go to a cafe, you have a house, bake a cake and invite your friends over. So you can't go to the cinema, you have a house, invite friends over and watch a dvd. Start a book club. There are plenty of great things you can do for little or no money. Sure it's nicer when money isn't a worry, but you don't need to spend money to have a good time.

beggars_bush

yeah, and i'll add to this:

Money Advice Bureau (think thats their name) can analyse your spending etc and suggest ways to budget better. where to cut back etc how to save money as well

Once i cut out drinking, buying crap food in supermarkets and getting take outs I saved a fortune.

merlie

Go to Mabs and they can negotiate with all the companies you pay your bills too so you can pay out something that you can afford and keep some money in your pocket.

In the mean time cut back on the things that are not really necessary and just the added expense. Cut out going to the cinema in the this current climate it is becoming a bit of a luxury you can watch a nice dvd at home with a nice home cooked meal which also saves money on eating out.

Shop around and spend wisely.

AARRRGH

beggars_bush wrote: »

Once i cut out drinking, buying crap food in supermarkets and getting take outs I saved a fortune.

Yeah, if people realised how dramatic the savings are, everyone would be doing it.

I don't drink (or at least, rarely drink), buy my clothes online (karmaloop.com), and in general don't get takeaways, and as a result I am able to save over half my wage every month. That's after rent and bills, etc.

LegacyUser

OP here again, just want to say a big thank you to everyone who replied.

shellyboo wrote: »

Fair enough. But his complaint is, "I have just enough money to live on". Hardly a big deal. He's not actually in financial trouble, he just can't go out as much as he'd like.

Well, join the club like. Welcome to Ireland in 2009.

Shelly I just want to point out that I don't care much that I can't go out, it was just an example, maybe a bad one because I also meant that I have no money for emergencies. For instance if I needed to go to the doctor I actually can't pay just now. If something broke in the house I can't pay for a plumber or electrician just now so that in my opinon is financial trouble. Thankfully these things haven't happened recently but they could at any time.

AARGH suggested that I do something to improve my education/job. I actually am doing that, have been training at night to do something else. The course and exams cost a lot so it's adding to the financial burden.

I'm not refusing to request moneymakeover assistance, I've done that in the past, I know how to live cheaply, I don't smoke, very rarely drink, I don't have unpaid bills. The main problem is lack of savings and not enough income to build up savings.

shellyboo

Unregistered wrote: »

Shelly I just want to point out that I don't care much that I can't go out, it was just an example, maybe a bad one because I also meant that I have no money for emergencies. For instance if I needed to go to the doctor I actually can't pay just now. If something broke in the house I can't pay for a plumber or electrician just now so that in my opinon is financial trouble. Thankfully these things haven't happened recently but they could at any time.

What I'm trying to point out is, there are loads and loads of people in the same situation, me for one. If I needed to go to the doc, I'd have to wait til payday, if something broke, I wouldn't be able to pay to fix it either.

You're not on your own - but you are in a FAR better position than a hell of a lot of people who don't know where the next mortgage payment is coming from. That's all I'm trying to say. If you have enough money to pay the bills and eat, then you have enough money.

LegacyUser

have you approached SVP they might be able to help you if you need assistance.

dellas1979

Hi,
Would it be possible to post something or PM what exactly what your financial situation is? i.e. like a spreadsheet of your incomes and out-goings.

No joke here-am a dinger at cutting costs. Am in part-time education myself and on part-time hours so I hear ya.

LegacyUser

In fairness to the OP, tenants who rent aren't really in a position to comment on someone "wallowing" Or indeed if you live somewhere built up, please don't tell OP to get rid of the car.

When you rent, if you fall behind, you're evicted, hopefully you have friends to help you out, put you up until you get back on your feet. You then brush yourself off and move on.

Wen you have a mortgage, if you fall behind, you're evicted, hopefully you have friends to help you out, put you up until you get back on your feet. You then brush yourself and face a lifetime of not being able to get finance for anything because you have a huge black mark on your name. For me, the fear isn't loosing my home and being homeless, my fear is loosing my home and NEVER being able to buy one again.

Also, you would not believe the costs in owning an house as opposed to just renting one.

I had to sell my car, because I needed a lump sum quickly (to cover last months mortgage) it costs me €10 a day to get to work on public transport, so it might not be financially feasable for the op to sell her car.

And before anyone persumes to comment on me buying a house (because lets face it, someone will say that I obviously bought a house I couldn't afford) I bought my house when I had a full time job on a good salary. I was made redundant too early to get any payment and took another job immediately. Since taking this job, they have dropped my wage by 15% and are cutting my days. There is nothing I can do about that because if I was to complain, they'd make me redundant.