Drink problem

LegacyUser

Hi guys, dont want to post this under my username.

I'm a 23 year old guy who loves socialising. There is nothing I love better than going out for the night with my mates for a few drinks and meeting people. I am a very active and healthy person. I play GAA and rugby at a fairly high level and have made lots of friends through these past times. Because I am sporty I tend to go for long periods without taking any drink, generally because I have matches and training on at the weekend. But I would still usually go out and be the designated driver.

My problem is this. When I do go out drinking, I just dont know what is going to happen. I am not a lightweight when I drink far from it. I am always one of the last ones up at parties and I can drink a huge amount. But whenever I hit a certain point of drunkiness, I turn into a real Jekyll and Hyde. I know everybody is going to say this happens to everyone when they are drunk but in my case it is fairly extreme. I come from a very respectable family, I have a very good job and I am the captain of my gaelic team and my rugby team and I am not blowing my trumpet but I know a lot of my friends and team mates look up to me. That's the good parts. But my bad drunken side is that I am ultra agressive, down right rude and bad mannered and generally a thug. My mates have even come up with a nickname for my drunken alter ego. The other thing as well is that I am currently seeing a girl I really like. When I am sober, we get on amazingly. When I am drunk, I feel like I torture the poor girl because of the way I get on.

I'm really annoyed at myself recently and I need to kick this bad habit if me and my girl are to have any chance. I am in no way an alcoholic, I know that. But would I be better staying away from booze altogether because of what it does to me? Any advice guys?

TwoShedsJackson

There's really only one thing you can do, and the tone of your post indicates you know it, and that's not drink the amount that sends you 'over the edge'.

You by no means have to give up entirely, but if you do have that much of a personality change and it's causing you and/or others a problem, it's a behaviour that needs to be changed.

If you're going out for a night where you'll be drinking, limit yourself to say an amount of pints which is less than what normally puts you over. Have water or non-alcoholic beer on other rounds. As you drink your inhibitions get lowered which makes it harder to stop drinking so you need to exercise some self-control here.

The other alternative is to stop drinking for a while and see how that goes, it seems you can already go without drinking for considerable periods of time, and especially if you are athletic you will reap the benefits of not drinking while you're playing sport.

There'll be plenty of time for (sensible) drinking in your mid 30s and on when you're too old to play sport properly

Good luck.

LegacyUser

Ditch the booze altogether. Its really not worth it both for your mental and physical health. Like you I play sports at a fairly high level and I came to the conclusion a few years ago that alcohol and sports dont mix. Its been 6 years since I ditched the drink and I can honestly say it is the best thing I ever did. You dont need alcohol, its completely unnecessary. You said yourself that you go long periods without drinking, so its not part of your regular routine. So why do you drink? After going weeks or months or whatever why do go on a bender? What purpose does it serve?
I know when youre sober that it can seem like youre the odd one out while everybody else is "having fun." And when I stopped drinking at first I did feel a little awkward. But when I didnt drink it opened my eyes and I saw how the world really is. I saw how it can turn nice people into monsters, how it can turn happy people into depressives. I dont know how many times friends of mine have come up to me the day after a night out and have said that they were depressed. Thats one thing all those glossy alcohol billboards dont tell you: That alcohol is a depressant. So why would you want to give yourself depression? People use alcohol as a crutch in this country. They'll tell you they like their few pints at the weekends and that theres nothing wrong with that. But there is something wrong with it because for most people its not just one or 2 pints on a saturday night, its more like 10 or 12.

Ask yourself this one question and answer honestly: Is drinking making my life better?
You have lots going for you so you dont need booze for anything. Plus you have a nice girlfriend which if you do give up drinking will help a lot.
Seriously, ditch the booze, you really dont need it.