hen problem

rubarbpie

When inviting all my friends etc to hen, I was told I had to invite mums and aunties. I did so but they all came back saying they wouldn't feel right going, they might put a damper in it etc. Kind of expected it anyway.
But FMIL is still going and is taking her friend who is very close to the family, invited was extended also.
So now all my friends (all 26 and under) and these 2 ladies are coming for the whole weekend. My CBM is trying to tone everything down because they're very reserved and I'm afraid it's going be very quiet in comparision to what it should be. I wouldn't mind but H2Bs family were the ones telling me to invite them! We're staying in a set of apartments together so there's no escaped.
I know I should have expected it but I just can't understand why they still want to come, it's just the last thing I could imagine them at. They don't drink and never go out. It's at the end of August & I'm nearly dreading it.

I wanted to mention that my mum isn't going(I'm sure she knows) to make sure she wouldn't feel awkward but if i do then I'll look like a biatch.

bensoneb

They need to know that they will be the only 'older' people going and may well make the decision that they would prefer not to go in that case. Ask your hubbie to have a word with them and maybe he can suggest that they may not enjoy it or something, in the nicest way possible of course.

iguana

bensoneb wrote: »

They need to know that they will be the only 'older' people going and may well make the decision that they would prefer not to go in that case. Ask your hubbie to have a word with them and maybe he can suggest that they may not enjoy it or something, in the nicest way possible of course.

And if that doesn't work ask your own older relatives again, explaining that your fMIL will be attending and you'd appreciate their company. That way it won't be so awkward. Either they will all get in the swing of things, or the older guests will branch off a bit without your fMIL feeling abandoned.

Seoid

To be honest, if you invited these people to come, you can't be annoyed that they have accepted the invitation!
But you could say there's been a change of plans and have a day/evening out with close friends & older relatives as well as the weekend.
Otherwise go back to your mum and aunties and invite them again - chances are if they are as reserved as you say, your FMIL & her friend will go to bed early anyway & you and your friends can still have a good night or two.

tatli_lokma

I agree with the above. I didn't have any such problem as this Thank God, but when my sisters were getting married they had a more 'calm' hen night in my mums with all the older rellies, grannies, neighbours etc. Turned out to be good craic, but of the more 'good clean fun' variety'. didn't cost much extra wither, other than the bother of making some grub and sambos. Maybe explain it as others have said, mentioning that it might not really be their thing and that the house party might be more suitable. My advice would be to get your H2B to do this - its his mum after all! Maybe say, that your mum and aunties would love to celebrate, but feel uncomfortable with the type of night out it will be, so you have decided 'for your mum's benefit' to have a second night, and perhaps your FMIL would prefer to come to that instead?

good luck with it - lesson to be learned, don't invite people you don't want there!