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Serious confidence issues

  • 28-07-2009 7:37am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Help me!

    I am a 27 year old who is acting like an 18 year old!

    I am sick of putting myself down, I get a lot of male attention and I still don't believe I am good enough for my boyfriend. I am convinced he is going to cheat on me with someone better looking. You know the type, gorgeous long blonde hair, gorgeous legs etc and I am the opposite, I have black hair and awful legs! My boyfriend has said a few girls are attractive who happen to be blonde, although they are on tv I am starting to think he prefers blondes even though he said at the start he likes dark haired girls.

    How can I act confident because I know confidence is more attractive than hair colour and sexy legs (or is it!??) - if I can fake confidence, I feel it may help but I don't know where to start and I don't know how to ignore the thoughts in my head and the fact I keep comparing myself to other women.


Comments

  • #2
    The Recliner
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,630 ✭✭✭The Recliner


    OP your boyfriend is with you for a reason, he finds you attractive, that alone should give you some confidence

    Personally I have always been attracted to dark haired girls but that doesn't mean that I don't find blonde or red haired or shaved headed girls attractive, each person can be attractive in their own way

    False confidence wont last, you need to trust that your boyfriend finds you attractive for who you are as well as what you look like as that is as important as anything else


  • #3
    Pawpad
    Closed Accounts Posts: 35 ✭Pawpad


    People will and do look when they are in relationships, it is natural and people are naturally drawn to good looking people, but it doesn't mean he wants to trade you in.

    What you have together is a lot more than a passing stranger, you are the whole package and there is nothing wrong with dark hair, I am certain you are beautiful if you get a lot of attention, and think - those men who do look at you will most probably have girlfriends of their own so don't worry!

    You don't need to fake confidence, just write a list of your good points and I bet they outweigh the bad, keep reading it to yourself until you believe it. You have programmed yourself to think bad things so you know if you programme yourself to think good, it will work.

    He wouldn't be with you if he didn't want to be.


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