Sick of this - whatever this is

LegacyUser

Hi,

Been through some rough years/experiences which have basically left me crushed and with zero-confidence. To cut a long story short over the past two yrs I've withdrawn from things, avoided crowded streets, eye-contact, meeting strangers, and at times daylight. I barely existed in my job, avoided social situations, places & responisbilities purely becuase of an inability to be comfortable in myself... In fact I was slowly hating myself and every move was plagued with paranoia.

So, I bit the bullet and spoke to my GP about it and was advised to pursue CBT (which I'm checking up on at the mo) and she put me on Cipramil (which I won't start until next month).

Has anyone else been on this medication? - if so how did they find it? - any good results? (not looking for medical advice just opinions on personal experience)


Thanks in advance for any insights & info, I've reached the point of no hope in my life and I'm tired of existing in shadow- point the way & I'll follow.

WindSock

Stay off the pot (if you smoke it)

Try to go back to entering the world one small step at a time perhaps. Maybe go for walks to places where you are not interacting with many people. Then as you regain your confidence go to shops and things where you know what sorts of interactions to expect. Do you have many friends or family or people who you trust?

Tchaikovsky

I feel for you OP, I've been there mate believe me.
But biting the bullet is one of the hardest things to do, and you've done it! You've reached the bottom and have just taken one giant step up.

I never had the opportunity to do CBT but supposedly it is really helpful; on top of the meds, it should give you the boost you need to improve your life. Don't worry if the medication doesn't work immediately- it can take alot of 'wait and see' with them.

LegacyUser

I was prescribed Ciprimil a few years ago. It is a mild anti-depressant and yes it does work. I was going through a very rough patch at the time, I was depressed and the tears just wouldnt stop. The medication was good for me and I saw positive changes in myself within 3 weeks. It sounds as though you are suffering from anxiety and I do believe this medication will help you. Anti-depressants can help you with depression/anxiety/stress and help you function on a daily basis but these tablets only make you feel a bit better because they cloud the problem to help you function, therapy will help you find the root of the problem and help you fix it properly. Best of luck with it

Babooshka

Unregistered wrote: »

I was prescribed Ciprimil a few years ago. It is a mild anti-depressant and yes it does work. I was going through a very rough patch at the time, I was depressed and the tears just wouldnt stop. The medication was good for me and I saw positive changes in myself within 3 weeks. It sounds as though you are suffering from anxiety and I do believe this medication will help you. Anti-depressants can help you with depression/anxiety/stress and help you function on a daily basis but these tablets only make you feel a bit better because they cloud the problem to help you function, therapy will help you find the root of the problem and help you fix it properly. Best of luck with it

What works for one person does not work for all. I'd monitor how you feel and keep a diary if you have to over next few weeks, sometimes anti d's can take a few weeks or a month or so before benefits, if you feel any become apparent.

And you did ask for opinions so I'm giving you mine. Too many doctors in this country throw anti depressants at you if you tell them you have a sore toe, any excuse. Not all but a good few. They are still wined and dined and taken on golf trips by pharmaceutical companies to pedal their wares for them. So trust yourself and how you feel when you take them.
I found them to just dumb down everything and I never needed them in the first place but my doctor told me I needed them and I believed him, but I didn't, so just take care. I know plenty of people will post saying they had positive experiences but I don't believe that as many people that are on anti d's need them as the doctors would like us all to swallow, literally.

Good luck with the CBT. I hope it helps you along.

seahorse

There will always be a for and against argument as far as anti-depressants are concerned OP. For my part, I don’t know if I could have made it through my long spell of depression without Prozac; but that's me and we're all individuals. Whether or not you need a course of anti-depressants will be something you'd be best advised to work out with your doctor and don’t mind what anyone else here is suggesting to you.

I’m not recommending you take everything your doctor tells you as gospel either; my doctor reckoned that with my history I should stay on anti-depressants for life. I thought: ‘fuk that’ and came off them when I felt ready.

As far as coming back from a crippling depression where you feel that life is neither meaningful nor useful, I can certainly tell you that IS possible, so don’t give up on that. Keep going and with the help and advice of the professionals along with your own determination you will find your way out.

LegacyUser

ciprimal
I was given this because i was depressed and it worked in only one way..
I didn`t feel depressed, I didn`t feel anything at all, zombie! I didn`t deal with the depression either it was a waste of time and there was no follow up from the Dr either just repeat prescriptions.
I sat in alone everynight and weekend because i didn`t feel happy enough to even get off the couch and return calls and socialise.
Also I didn`t deal with anything else while on the medication, bills etc. just piled up but I was so medicated it didn`t bother me..
Time heals better and i took up excercising and a better diet and eventually I got less depressed and coped better with lifes up and downs.
I would never take anything like that again. It was a waste of 3 good yrs when a little TLC and maybe counselling would have me right in the end,

LegacyUser

I'm on it now and thank God for it. My own brain was turning on me and torturing me with the exact same feelings as you describe so well.

Worthlessness and mantras going through my brain telling me I cant cope and I cant make it.

I too avoid responsibility and fear being overloaded. Small ordinary tasks are like mountains to climb. But like you I kept it all inside for fear of being thought self pitying.

But the problem there is everyone thinks you are coping. And also because this has been a state of mind for so long, its normal to me. Life is very difficult, with even supposedly pleasurable activities being nothing except a hassle and another job to be done....

I started Cipramil and began to feel better. I dont mean like other people exactly but able to get through the days. I am even excersising now. I would not have had the energy before.

You know what its like scraping through life on your hands and knees, anyway, can you start the tablets any earlier because I found the thoughts eased up greatly even after a few days on them....

Although what worries me is I have been on and off anti-depressants for a good deal of my adult life.

I saw a psychiatrist and he told me to manage my symptoms with lifestyle changes and self monitoring which was the biggest disaster ever. I wasted years trying to follow that advise and what a crock it was.

Depression is an autonomous disease in some people, yes lifestyle changes help. But if your brain is suseptible to attacking itself its pointless telling someone to use willpower to get themselves out of it. It is very much a chemical pain and the suffering is immense.

I wish you all the best.

LegacyUser

Hi OP - a number of years back I was on Cipramil after going through a particularly rough patch. I was sufferin from depression brought on by anxiety over some situations I'd found myself in.

The Cipramil helped - took the edge off the pain and allowed to start working my way out of the quamire of my mind. I stayed off drink while I was on it and I think that's an important thing for it to work properly and also because drink is NOT going to help you any in a situation like you're in.

However the Cipramil alone isn't enough. You have to take positive steps to get your life back to normal. I was lucky in that I was suffering from relatively mild symptoms and was only on medication for about 4 or 5 months.

Use it as a (very useful) aid but don't expect it to fix everything.

LegacyUser

Please dont take anti-depressants, they solve nothing. CBT is incredible and it works, just stick with that. Dont mess about with your body chemistry by taking pills. I know you feel bad and down but the pills will not sort out the reasons why you feel down. They act as a cover so that you dont feel the full impact of your feleings which is not a good thing. You need to feel it all because when you feel your feelings the answers come. seriously they do, you just have to be brave and let it be. Use the CBT because that will sort out any distortions in your thinking which in turn will make you feel better. "Mind over Mood" is probably THE book on CBT to use. Its very easy to follow and I promise it works.
Ditch the pills, they create more problems than they solve.

RoZZaH

Not sure I agree with previous poster re: saying no to pills.
This sounds serious enough if you're having difficulty leaving the house/functioning then cipramil, or zanax or anxiety/anti-d may help you to cope/function. They are not necessarily a long term solution (though some may argue that their brains chemistry is the way it is (they have a pre-dispostion to depression or anxiety)) you'll have to do the hard work on your underlying issues.

Building up to 20 mins vigorous exercise (jog/swim) will really help your body produce it's own anti-depressants (endrophins) and make you feel better (and possibly work out some of that rage (and loathing for the self-loathing part of you)) but also I would recommend rather than fight uncomfortable feelings you start to use relaxation as a way to calm your mind and start to see your fears for what they are - feelings, feelings that may seem to overwhelm you but they just scream and shout and make a big fuss and try to influence you - but DONT CONTROL YOU - I highly recommend Russ Harris The Happiness Trap - which uses mindfulness as part of therapy. you could use this with your therapist (defo recommend that course of action).

Kimono-Girl

before you start on Cipramil i would make sure you have the counseling to help you through your feelings. And seriously research the drug route with a trusted doctor.

i was on it for around 3 years and the side affects going on and off it are awful, once i forgot to take a tablet accidentally and i was out of work for 3 days with really bad side affects. i had to come off it when i found out i was pregnant and honestly when i came off it and to this day my doctors don't want me to continue on it,so im still off it but i put that down to counseling, thats what solved the original problem for me.

might i add the drug itself will not help you get better without professional help which in this country is usually only available to those in extreme circumstances or with alot of money.. the 'free' non HSE services in my personal opinion fro my experiances dont come close to the outpatient hospital care, they didnt help me at all.

as regards my experience the Cipramil itself did help me to a degree but it took years (im still attending monthly clinics) of counseling to relearn correct behaviour patterns and to control my feelings and moods. all the Cipramil did for me was keep me temporarily calm and stable enough to function in everyday life while i learned how to cope with life itself. i was told by professionals the drug is not a long term solution. and i found it didnt help as much as i originally thought it would.

i hope this helps you somewhat. and good luck with whatever you choose!

LegacyUser

Hi,

Last October I went to my GP with symptoms similar to those you describe albeit in a milder form. I found that once I had started taking steps to address the problem things got a lot easier. My GP prescribed Cipramil and arranged a consultation with a psychiatrist who has kept me on it since. The psychiatrist also advised me to try CBT which I have found very beneficial.

I found that the Cipramil took the nasty edge off things and allowed me to start sorting myself out. I haven't noticed any major side effects apart from feeling a little more tired than usual. I have also forgotten to take it once or twice but unlike the poster above, I didn't notice anything different.

I find CBT is a hugely useful tool to help me intercept and avoid negative thought patterns. I had about six sessions and learned quite a lot from them.

My GP, psychiatrist and CBT thrapist all recommended the following
- avoid drugs
- avoid alcohol
- get plenty of exercise
- eat healthily

It is useful to have someone to talk to, I'm very lucky to have a very supportive spouse and sisters. Even admitting I had a problem was a huge relief and having someone ask me how I am every now and again is great. There is a stigma to having depression and it can be hard to confide in someone but it is worth it in terms of sharing the burden.

I will be on Cipramil for a few more months and when I come off it I should be able to use CBT to fall back on if I need to. If I compare myself now and twelve months ago there is a huge difference, I feel normal again, back to the old me.

I can post the details of the CBT therapist if you like.