ANY advice would help

neversuitedher

Hello all! I would just like to apologise in advance for the long thread. Ok so here’s the story I’m a 20 year old female, I’m 5ft 4 and shamefully 11 and ½ stone. Basically I’ve never been happy with my looks or weight . I was anorexic at 14 for about a year or two (cant really remember that time in my life) I was found out by my parents and dislike comments (even nice ones) about how I had lost weight. So to hide it I ate in front of everyone so they knew I didn’t have a problem anymore and was therefore “fixed”. So now are a result of my drastic eating habits I’m over weight and repulsed by my body and its seriously getting me down. I live at home and feel if I didn’t it would be a hell of a lot easier to loose weight as I wouldn’t have the temptations of all the junk food at home. I basically eat what I like when I like and with no limit, and I think it might be as a rebellion to my eating disorder in the past. I know this will sound really strange but I feel embarrassed to go on a diet in fear of people looking at me and judging my weight, and also I wouldn’t feel at all comfortable in the gym exercising. I feel I need the structure of a plan like weight watchers although I know I wouldn’t be able to go as id be too self-conscious. I know how easy and effective it would be for me to loose weight by not eating again but I don’t want to stat that rubbish again. I really want to get my act together and get healthy and feel great about my body for the first time in my life. What I’m asking you is do you know any good and effective exercise plans or fitness plan websites? Do you have any meal plans or good healthy eating websites because the “eating” part is where I’m really stuck I literally don’t know what’s “good” or “bad” for me anymore. According to my BMI calculator I think I should be loosing about 2 stone. Do you have any idea how long it would take to loose that kind of weight? I really want to get motivated and feel good about my self. My weights really upsetting me at the moment and my life. Any advise at all would be greatly appreciated! Thanks in advance. x

Khannie

Sounds like you're in a good place for a change in lifestyle. Losing 2 stone (and keeping it off) will probably take anywhere from 4-12 months at a guess.

neversuitedher wrote: »

I live at home and feel if I didn’t it would be a hell of a lot easier to loose weight as I wouldn’t have the temptations of all the junk food at home.

I'd suggest you ask your folks to keep all the crap in one press and just don't go near it. That's what we do in my house and it works quite well. Either that or ask them to cut down the amount they buy. Your parents will probably be very receptive to it.

neversuitedher wrote: »

What I’m asking you is do you know any good and effective exercise plans or fitness plan websites?

I think sparkpeople could probably help you. I've seen others on here recommend it and I like the emails they drop in my inbox. The stickies on here are very useful. Take it one step at a time though and don't deprive yourself completely of treats. Drastic changes are usually not sustained.

I'd suggest you try to find some kind of activity that you enjoy. Anything is better than nothing. Walking's a great place to start but after a while it's worth trying to find something that'll push you a bit harder. Are there any sports that you like or used to like?

Effigy

Hey there

You should try and start walking. thats always the best form of exercise.
Drink water when you think you are craving sweet things/junk food.
Good luck!

squod

Stephen Fry (English actor) lost a load of weight recently by walking
and listening to books, audio books, on his ipod.
Try http://www.audiobooks.org/

I regularly listen to the radio on my phone and walk.

I gave the same advise to somone last week, don't worry too much.
Walk a lot and let time take care of the weight.

metamorphosis

caloriecount.com has forums with everything diet/fitness/health and support wise you could imagine.

There are some very supportive, understanding and great people in their weight loss forum.

You can also log your food with the same site and you can calculate how much you should eat with it as well.

Good luck.

d'Oracle

Hi OP.

Two things.
Not really what you asked but may help, just putting my 2 cents in.

1) I think you have some issues outstanding, (not exactly mensa here from myself). You might benefit from bringing these issues to a councillor.

My thinking on this is it, it would be hard for someone like me to reconcile with what your problems are. You shouldn't be repulsed by your own body IMO. It may help to talk to someone about your feelings, diet issues and self image, try to get them dealt with so you can deal with the more important task of getting healthy.
To get over anorexia is tough as nails by all accounts.
If you can deal with that, you can deal with this.

2) Actually aim to get fit and healthy.
Rather than get less fat, look nicer, read more about getting you self aerobically fit and strong. Rather than focusing on bad stuff in your diet, focus on how to get good stuff in there.

Personally, I suspect the biggest enemy of people with image issues focused around weight is the fact that they look at the fat. The people in the best shape look at what they can do, not what they are.

Oh and mention the junk food issues to your family.
You might end up helping your families health too.

Maybe read around about some other stuff.

Good luck.

mcguiver

Sounds like you've already made the right decision that you want to do something about whats getting you down.

Firstly, your not hugely overweight, you can start seeing results very quickly, and that will encourage you more and it becomes a cycle...you feel, look better...you'll want to keep up the good work.

Also remember that at your age your body is still going through physical/hormone changes..and our lifestyles are all over the place.

A diary of food and exercise is a great start. Write down everything you eat/drink daily. We all know whats good and bad for us. Any exercise is better than none, set small targets and go for it.

Best of luck, there's tonnes of info on the net for nutrition/exercise...it's not rocket science though... it's the will power to get into good habits. If something is upsetting you this much and having an effect on you then you should do something about about it.

YT

Hi Neversuitedher.

I'm 25 and the same height and 11 stone. I also don't feel very confident with my body. First of all I want to say something to you about the BMI index (someone may correct me on it if they want) but this is how I think about it, if I was too lose the 2 stone the BMI wanted me to lose I would be walking around with a lollipop head. My doctor weighed me a couple of months ago and said "I don't know where you are holding that weight because you don't look it" I think if my doctor was fine with my weight then that's ok for me.

At the moment I am going to the gym, I have been building up my fitness ( I have always walked so I'm not that unfit) and now I am starting on toning exercises. My aim is to tone my body and perhaps lose half a stone.

I've made a list of things I do like about my body, I have fabulous legs! I have gorgeous eyes! My hair is lovely! Nothing is NICE. I dislike the word Nice. And I made a list of the things about my body that I dislike and how I can improve them. My stomach - I am going to tone it. My teeth - I am going to use a whitening toothpaste. Things like that.

Look in the mirror and focus on the things about yourself that you do like and highlight them.

Pick a night once a week and treat yourself to a bath with some candles and nice bath oils, do all your beauty bits and bobs. Shaving, exofoliation, hair treatment, face mask, finger nails and toes, stray hair plucking! Maybe buy a book to read on those nights or a CD to listen to. Make it your special night. I can guarantee you will feel really good after it!

I ignore dress sizes, some days I'm a 12 other days a 14 sometimes a 16! So I just buy what fits me, and if the size bothers me I cut the tags off.

People say to love your body, but for me at the moment aiming to like my body is enough. When I like it, I will learn to love it.

And above all, make sure you are doing this for yourself, not for anyone else.

Good Luck sister.:)

eilyducks

Hi OP,
You said you would be too embarased to go to a weight watchers meeting? Well they have an "At Home" service too. They send you everything you need-booklets, food tracking sheets, etc. You then work on the programme at home and there's no need to go to the meetings or weigh ins.
I joined WW last week, was TERRIFIED going to the meeting but it actually turned out to be good fun and I'm looking forward to next weeks. You can also skip the chat and just get weighed if you like.
www.fitday.com is also a very good website, you can track everything you eat and all your exercise and it does all the calcultions for you! Easy peesy!

I know how you feel trying to loose weight when you've had problems "going overboard" with weight loss. I managed to shake myself out of a really bad downward spiral when someone took a photo of me. Wasn't very flattering and scared me to death. Good luck with what ever you plan on doing!!!
eilyducks

all_smilz

good luck hun,

i would agree with the idea of going for counselling, it might be safer and gentler for you and put you in a better place to get to where you want to be.

Talk to your family about it if you can? They might exercise with you or help you eat healthy foods and maybe realise that you just want to be healthier and not "THIN" like when you were a teen, the openness will make them less likely to panic or worry as families do.... and you'll get a LOT of support as well.

PS read back over your first entry..... you'll see exactly how much strength of character you do have.....:)

ragg

Get an exercise buddy - that way you can go to a gym with someone will take your mid of other people being there.

With regards to your diet, only you can change that. I used to be very wreckless with my diet and i very self concious because I was overweight. It is kind of like a spiral.
Once you start making positive changes, your mental state changes too. I know that sounds like hippy nonsense, but it is 100% true - try it, you will be amazed