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Lacking conversation skills

  • 17-07-2009 12:45am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Need some advice and opinions please. I'm female, 28.

    Started working full time a little over a year ago in a job with long hours - about 50 hours. A lot of stress with the job but I wouldn't change it for the world - I love what i do.

    I have noticed within the past few months that I have less and less to say in that I'm finding it hard to add to conversations. I would add some talk but I'm not as chatty or as humourous any more. I'm also afraid of expressing my opinions in fear of sounding stupid (not in work but at home and in social situatiions) - had always a problem with that, even in school.

    I used to have no problems cracking up jokes before. I used to be very witty and people used to say that they love my witty sense of humour. I just don't have that anymore and I wish I do.

    I feel I'm going braindead. And I feel its due to work and being tired in my spare time. Hadn't time off from work in a long time except for weekends (I'm talking holidays).

    Also within the past few months I have noticed that I'm having problems with speech and language.

    - my spellings are dire and finding it hard to spell some words that I had no problem with before. I have to use a dictionary a lot even when composing text messages. Haven't used a dictionary for this post though!

    - have trouble at pronouncing some words. I try to pronounce them but they come out wrong.

    Any advice for me. How can I improve conversation skills?


Comments

  • #2
    Nevyn
    Closed Accounts Posts: 43,045 ✭✭✭✭Nevyn


    First off please go to you dr and get a complete check up to make sure that there is not something wrong and hopefully there isnt and they will be able to help with combating the tiredness.

    If everything checks out with the dr look at what your passions are and find away to work them back into your life.


  • #3
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Hi OP,

    Yeah as previously said maybe you need to put your mind at rest that there is nothing major going on with you, Stress can really make the brain feel forgetful sometimes,

    As regards to wanting to be more conversational, its hard to try and be something you are not being at the moment, maybe your job is coming first right now and you are prioritizing it in your life, you may be getting an indication now that you are working too hard and want to invest in yourself a bit more, dont worry about not cracking jokes etc anymore, we do change as we get older and it may not be a bad thing, unless you really feel your work is having a negative impact on you and you life then try balance it up, Its really good you love your job though.


  • #4
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Hey
    I'm a 26 yr old girl, and I've worked 50+ hr weeks for the last few years, in pretty high stress environment.
    I don't have the problems with language like that, but I do find my short term memory is terrible and getting progressively worse! As in, it takes a lot of effort to remember every evening what I did that morning. And as for remembering what i did yesterday, or last weekend - forget it.
    One thing I will say is that you need to make sure you're getting enough sleep - 7-8 hrs at least every night - and that you are eating properly. Loads of fruit and veg, and proper meals.Avoid junk food and caffeine if possible. I'm bad for spending my entire weekend running around doing stuff aswell, and I find I kind of crash every 4-5 weeks and have to spend a weekend doing nothing (getting old!). So try having some you time at weekends, where you can switch off.
    Take a long look at your lifestyle, and if you're that tired and worried, then yes, go and see a doctor.
    I will say this though. It is extremely hard to have hobbies and outside interests when you're working these hours. I've tried - struggled - with it.I'd love to have the energy to go for a run in the evenings or keep up some sport outside work, but sometimes I just have to accept that I've made so much effort during the day that I need to give my body a break and just relax. It's tough and I kind of resent my job for that.
    I think the thing about expressing opinions is more of a confidence thing, especially if it's a problem you had in school. That is something you can probably work on yourself.
    Anyway, hope that helps, and you're not alone!!


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