Sister Worries

LegacyUser

Hi
I'm really looking for a place to vent my worries but some advice would be great too.
My problem is my sister. While I love her to bits, she is a very opinionated person who thinks her way of doing anything is the only way. She has never left our small town ever but knows everything there is to know about the world (in her opinion). She has two kids, and in my opinion she is the worse role model ever. Her and her boyfriend sit around smoking pot in the house in front of their 5yr old. (Her boyfriend is out of work now so this is what he does all day, in fairness to her she works four days a week), They let him eat junk food all day long and drink lucozade. She never cooks a proper meal.
Now, my probelm is I'm due my baby boy any day and my mum has kindly offered to take him when I go back to work which is great, she'll be a great help. But unfortunatly she told me tonight that my sister is planning on pitching in and minding him up in her house tooon the days she doesn't work. Now the anxiety has kicked in good and proper for me. I will sound like such an ungratful cow for saying I don't want my sister minding my child and influencing him in any way, and my partner feels the very same way. We only want my mum having him.
Another thing I didn't mention is she has a 14yr old son from another boyfriend who she lets smoke pot and sleep with his girlfrind under her roof!! She thinks I'm really square but I just want to be the best mum and give my kids the best and healthiest start to life. I don't want him around smoke and especially not pot!!
How do I broach this situation???

Nettie

Well I don't blame you for not wanting your baby around your sister! This thought isn't a good help for you at the moment since you're about to give birth soon. I think you should just tell your sister how you feel really soon. It'll be best for you and your baby. Plus it might make her realise what a bad mother she is and hopefully she'll change her ways.

Good luck with your new baby!

LegacyUser

have a chat with your sis and just be open and honest about your differences in attitide to life. dont be condescending or judgmental just be practical and honest and very respectfull of her way. she will be more understanding if she feels respected.

niceoneted

I think maybe the best thing to do is find someone independent to mind your child in their own home. Explain to your mum that you do not want it to be a burden on her. You want her to be able to enjoy her time as she spent long enough looking after you and your siblings.
You can maybe ask your mum to take the wee fella some evenings/weekend days/nights so you can get out with your other half.
This will mean the complicated explanation re your sister is left out.
I would not under any circumstances leave your child with your sister as you rightly agree.