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Is my boyfriend gay?

  • 08-07-2009 06:16PM
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9



    Hi all, I’m a first time user and I need some serious advice or to be honest nearly abuse for what I have allowed to happen. I have been with my boyfriend a number of years and we have a new beautiful baby girl. 2 weeks ago I found texts on his phone to other men and naked pictures of men on his phone. He swears he is not gay and had no intention of doing anything with these men. This has been going on for 5 years (before we met). Every few months he goes on Irish gay websites and emails men. In some cases he hands out his mobile number and texts for a while. He received pictures from these men and saves them and sends them onto other men, None of the pictures in his sent items are actually pictures of him. I also found a profile picture of him. One guy requested a picture of him and he had this saved on his phone, it appeared he never sent this though. He says he does n’t know why he does this, he gets no kicks out of it sexually and he just wants to see how far the guys will take it. He has never met up with anyone nor does he ever intend to. He started on these websites after breaking up with his first girlfriend of 7 years and before we met.

    He has always been a good boyfriend, he has never cheated on me and I know this for a fact. But now I feel so betrayed and I do think he has cheated on me in a way. I cannot get over the fact that it has been men he’s been texting and it’s photos of men that he is looking at. It makes me sick. I had a difficult birth that ended up being a caesarean Section, while I was in hospital he signed himself up to yet another website??? Seriously what does this say about a person??

    He has begged me to stay and I have but I feel so lost, I feel like a fool and I am not a weak person but I must be to stay with him. He says it will never happen again but how am I to trust him and how can I ever look at him the same again? If it was n’t for our new baby I’d be gone. I’m not looking for sympathy I can leave, I have great support around me, I just need to know why he’s doing this and am I just a fool and is he actually gay? I’ve always thought it’d be so easy to leave someone who has hurt me this much, but I can’t seem to. I’m fine and smug to see the bad in other people’s boyfriends who treat them badly saying if it was me I’d be gone and then something this unbelievable happens and I’ve stayed. I’m hoping if people just tell me I’m a fool, I’ll actually get strong enough to do it.

    Sorry about the rant, have nobody to talk to about this. I can’t have this get out, I’m so ashamed and I don’t want this getting out and my daughter growing up listening to these stories about her dad ( we live in a small place where everybody knows everybody).
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