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Family/Unemployment Issues

  • 05-07-2009 05:13PM
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,006 ✭✭✭✭


    Just needed to vent my spleen somewhere.....basically, the **** has hit the fan when it comes to my family's financial problems, something we've never faced before. I'm the eldest "child", a 21 year old guy, about to start my final year of college. Neither my brother or I have a job, even a part time one, a difficulty I know many people are facing.

    With costs being cut in every available area, tensions are beginning to run sky high. My mother is the only one in the family with an honest to goodness job, with my father having to come out of his early retirement to get a low-paying FAS-course job, which took him about two years to find.

    I know this sounds odd, but I've never even had a part time job. I got by on the kindness of my parents, who before now had no financial problems. I am definitely on the shy side, which my parents (my mother mainly) are saying that I'll never get anywhere in life if I stay so introverted. Her frustration with me only mounts higher when she asks if I've heard from any of the places that I've applied for a job, to which I have replied "no" for the last three or four years. That usually results in either a stony silence or, in the worst case, a fortnight-long shot-fest from my mum: sniping, belittlement, sarcastic remarks etc. At one point I was flat out told to get my useless ass out of the house, to see how long I'd last in the world.

    I have never felt so useless. I mean, who else tries for years on end to get their first job, and fails every time? I am never more embarrassed than on the few times a year I'd be granted a job interview, and the interviewer brings up the fact that I'm this old and still have yet to get my first job. I hate disappointing my parents like this, and continuing to be a drain on them. Is there any little trick I can use to my advantage in a snagging a job...any job at all?


Comments

  • Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,698 Mod ✭✭✭✭Silverfish


    What have you done to make yourself more employable?

    You mentioned four years - what courses have you done in this time?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 46 fintonagirl


    ach i feel bad for you... there's nothing like the guilt of disappointing parents..to get you down. mine are masters at it :)

    Here's all I can think of:

    Have you had someone look at your cv, a friend, careers advisor etc?

    Get yourself good referees, are you involved in any kind of extra curricular activities sport, gaeisce etc..

    what course are you studying, have you had any uni placements? if not why don't you take and look for even an unpaid one now for the rest of july august, even if they would only give you few weeks would be something.

    how about some voluntary work, again doesn't necessarily have to be charity orientated... something that would boost your cv give you opprtunity to develop/ demonstrate skills necessary for kinds of jobs you would be applying for.

    how about being a bti enterprising look for jobs you could do in local area..window washing, bin cleaning, mowing lawns, babysitting... even just start with few neighbours and friends..even if you don't amke much would be able to say you have been doing this kind of work..would get you out of house..

    you don't have any family friends etc with businesses who would be willing to take you on even voluntary.. give you a bit of a reference?

    if i think of anything else i'll come back to you. if you are as shy as you say you just need to get out there and get something..however small. in your mind a job has probably become this unobtainable thing now its not.. you just need to start getting creative and building some confidence.


    best of luck


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,428 ✭✭✭sunnyside


    If you can't lie about work experience I would tell the interviewer the truth. Tell them "I know it sounds bad but during the celtic tiger years my parents had no problem supporting me, they didn't really want me to work because they wanted me to focus on school and college but now money is much tighter and I don't like asking my parents for money. This is why I don't have work experience but I do have excellent computer/people skills and I'm very enthusiastic and willing to work"


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 813 ✭✭✭Sinall


    Do unpaid work experience. Pick an industry you want to get into, approach some companies and offer to work for free for a couple of months. A girl I know did this when she moved here from NZ and she did the same when she moved to London. She proved herself and each time she was kept on. Even if you are not kept on it will be something to put on your CV.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 39,019 ✭✭✭✭Permabear


    This post has been deleted.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,477 ✭✭✭Kipperhell


    There are a few issues here.
    Firstly your parents have been very good to pay for you up until this point so any frustration from them is perfectly normal and should be accepted.

    Your parents financial situation doesn't sound very well thought out if your dad came out of early retirement. Namely because in such a short time they realise they need more money.

    You yourself never having a job is an issue. I can't see how you never worked a summer at least since your leaving cert. Anyway forgetting my disbelief you need to take up some work even if it is charity work. You must have the time to do something. I would say your parents are more annoyed that all you do is enjoy yourself. What are you doing with your time? Apply for ever job you can.


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