Going travelling, but what about her?

LegacyUser

Hi there

I’m 23. I'm going travelling soon, probably for a year with a couple of friends. But, here comes the dilemma, I've been going out with a great girl for almost two years. Before we met I wasn’t really interested in a relationship, just living from Saturday night to Saturday night – but she’s tamed me.

We discussed it ages ago, and decided that I'd go with my friends and she'd go with hers, but that we'd stay together and meet up as often as possible. But the closer departure day comes along, the more it becomes apparent that my friends don't really want to spend time with her friends and vice versa, having said that though, she gets on really well with my friends and I do with hers too.

So, it seems like we're being torn apart from each other. We can't really discuss it because it just starts rows between us, so we've been like ostriches burying our heads in the sand about it for the last few months...

The idea of her being with anyone else while we're apart repulses me, but at the same time I'm not sure if I want to miss out on any possible experiences while I'm away.

The friends I’m going away with have both been in relationships that have broken up relatively recently so I think that they will tell me that all relationships end and that I should enjoy the year as best as I can – so I’m asking you guys for a neutral opinion.

Short term fun vs long term happiness?

I'm still mad about her but outside factors are putting doubt in my mind.

Any thoughts for a tormented soul?

Cheers...

Adamisconfused

Personally, I think you’d be foolish to miss out on an opportunity to go travelling. If you don’t go then you’ll regret it and resent your girlfriend for you choosing to stay.
Realistically, what are your options?
1) Stay in contact with each other and promise to be faithful. Long distance relationships rarely work, but that is down to the people in them.
2) Call an end to the whole relationship right now and see if there is any flame left in a year’s time.
3) Don’t go.

Quite frankly, I think you would soon forget some of your feelings for her once you are out of the country and enjoying yourself. The fact that you’re asking here shows that you are keen to go and I don’t blame you. I’m coming down on the, go and see the world, side

RHunce

live for the moment man you dont want to miss out on great thing

your two single friends will be pulling left right and centre and you'll be pulling your wire if youre still with her, its only a year, hell she could want the same thing too and want a break for a year. everything works itself out mate, if its meant to be it will be in later years, if its not then its not simple as

BubbleWrap85

I definitely wouldn't consider NOT going just because of a relationship. I want to go travelling in 2 or 3 years time - my bf has done quite a lot of travelling and I don't know if it came to it whether he'd come or not.

Simply what I would do is end the relationship. If it's meant to be, it's meant to be. A year apart could help you decide whether she is truly the one or not. Suppose it's a bit like that programme Temptation Island. You're off for a year, exploring, meeting other girls etc If you come back and still decide you love her, [and her you hopefully!] then fantastic.

You'll still have your fantastic life experiences from your year travelling.