Can't get my sh*t together

LegacyUser

Hi,
Thirtysomething and single.
Just had a look at my bank account and over the weekend (Sat - Monday)I withdrew €600 from the ATM out on the p*ss. These seems to happen everytime I go out.
I can go couple weekends and not go out but then if someone suggests ( or I suggest) going for pints on Sat I can end up still out Sun night or on Monday. This level of spending any weekend I go out is a regular occurrence I have literrally no savings after working full time for approx 12 years, I live month to month and and am now left th approx €450 (after mortgage) to live on till next pay day (3 weeks).

I keep promising myself I wont do this but it keeps happening. I have a big holiday in August and this really f**ks me up as I will struggle to have money if I keep going at this rate plus it really messes my efforts to lose some weight before the holiday. I know I cant afford to go out over next few weeks plus I dont want to right now but I cant honestly say that come Saturday if a mate rings me up this w/end or in 3 weeks for pints that I wont go and do the same thing again - its very despressing.

Is this an illness, is it alcoholism, binge drinking, boredom or weak willed?

Nevyn

Why not set up a direct debit from your account to a savings account that way the money is not were you can get at it handily.

Also set yourself a limit and bring only that ammount in cash wth you and leave your cards behind.

IF you are concerned that it is binge drinking to the stage you are doing things you regert I suggest talking to your dr and maybe knocking drinking for a while, can you go out and not drink? Can you limit your intake to a certain ammount?

cosmic

Why not try taking up a sport for evenings and weekends? Something inexpensive, maybe swimming (pools are cheap enough these days) or cycling (if you have a bike) or jogging? When someone phones you late in the evening about going out you'll probably be too wrecked to get up off the sofa! And it would be a good way to lose the weight you want to lose before your holiday.

Oh The Humanity

Cripes!

Firstly dont bring the bank card out with you. Take out say €100 for the night and instruct your friends not to lend you any money no matter how much you beg them later.

Other than that, you should definitely reflect on the boozing, you dont have to be drinking a secret bottle of gin hidden in the cistern to be an alcoholic.

You can be a 'functioning alcoholic' days of no drinking and then when it comes to the pub or a social occasion not being able to stop is a red flag.

Course Im not judging you because who among us can say we never mess up..but still keep an eye on it.

Tip into an AA meeting if you feel you would like to see what its all about. You dont have to say anything if you dont want, you can just listen and you dont have to go back if its not for you!

Best of luck.

galwaybob

Oh a familiar tale OP but dont beat yourself up about it, shure half the country is in the same boat as you.
600 euro is a shockin site of money to be spending on drink though, are you a bit of a champagne charley?
Stopping going out at the weekends probably isnt an option for you so I suggest you make an effort to cut down on the cost, thats the real problem after all. You should start drinking high strength larger 8 or 9 %. Ideally have a few of these before you even leave the house and by the time you get to a club that night you will be already locked and so wont need to buy their overpriced crap.

ve

Seriously OP you know what's wrong, you're an adult, it really is just a matter of having a little self discipline. If it's a case whereby you have a few beers and then throw care to the wind when ur having a good time then you have to (as others have suggested) remove your ability to make the decision to put yourself in to further debt while under the influence. Leave your cards at home and do not take loans. €600 is an awful lot. Your liver must be suffering terribly.

I hold my hand up that I will go on a night out and blow €100 - €120, but I do that about once every 6 months. Lately since this recession kicked in, myself and mates go drinking in eachother's houses (start around 8 or 9) and head in to town around 11. It cuts the cost of a night out in half, straight away. In town we don't go anywhere that charges admission either, and we share the price of a cab. More money spent does not equal a better night out. Don't bother with rounds, they are an absolute curse. This idea of going up to the bar to get a round of Jagerbombs is absolutely stupid. I've done it in the past, and the next day I would have always woken up feeling so ashamed at the fact that I blew 50 quid for something that lasted about 5 mins. Would you walk up to a Smoothie bar during the day and buy a round of Smoothies unprovoked for all your mates?. Not a chance. Alcohol is a curse, but you have to keep control and behave responsibly.