Sick of chain mails?

L_gaucho

Forward this to the offenders...:D






or the Billy Connelly response..


Chain Letter


Hello, my name is William and I suffer from guilt for not forwarding
50 billion f**king chain letters sent to me by people who actually
believe that if you send them on, a poor six year old girl in Queensland with
a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it
removed before her redneck parents sell her to a travelling freak
show.

And, do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you, and
everyone to whom you send "his" email, $1?

How stupid are we?

Ooooh, looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll
get laid by a model I just happen to run into the next day!"

What a bunch of bulls**t.

Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my house and
sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing a chain letter that was
started by St Peter in 5AD and brought to this country by midget
pilgrim stowaways on the Endeavour.

F*ck 'em.

If you're going to forward something, at least send me something
mildly amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 10 of your closest friends,
and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a
nickel from some omniscient being" forwards about 90 times.

I don't f*cking care.

Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually
contributing to by sending out these forwards. Chances are, it's your
own unpopularity.

The point being? If you get some chain letter that's threatening to
leave you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it.

If it's funny, send it on.

Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper in
Botswana with no teeth who has been tied to ! the arse of a dead
elephant for 27 years and whose only salvation is the 5 cents per
letter he'll receive if you forward this email.

Now forward this to everyone you know. Otherwise, tomorrow morning
your underwear will turn carnivorous and will consume your genitals.

Have a nice day.

P.S. Send me 15 euro and Then F*ck Off

Capt'n Midnight

If you receive an e-mail with a subject line of "Badtimes," delete it immediately WITHOUT reading it. This is the most dangerous Email virus yet.

It will re-write your hard drive. Not only that, but it will scramble any disks that are even close to your computer. It will recalibrate your refrigerator's coolness setting so all your ice cream melts and milk curdles . It will demagnetize the strips on all your credit cards, reprogram your ATM access code, screw up the tracking on your VCR and use subspace field harmonics to scratch any CDs you try to play.

It will give your ex-boy/girlfriend your new phone number. It will mix antifreeze into your fish tank. It will drink all your beer and leave its dirty socks on the coffee table when there's company coming over.

It will hide your car keys when you are late for work and interfere with your car radio so that you hear only static while stuck in traffic.

Badtimes will make you fall in love with a penguin. It will give you nightmares about circus midgets. It will replace your shampoo with Nair and your Nair with Rogaine, all while dating your current boy/girlfriend behind your back and billing their hotel rendezvous to your Visa card.

It will seduce your grandmother. It does not matter if she is dead, such is the power of Badtimes, it reaches out beyond the grave to sully those things we hold most dear.

Badtimes will give you Dutch Elm disease. It will leave the toilet seat up and leave the hairdryer plugged in dangerously close to a full bathtub. It will wantonly remove the forbidden tags from your mattresses and pillows, and refill your skim milk with whole. It is insidious and subtle. It is dangerous and terrifying to behold. It is also a rather interesting shade of mauve.

Be very, very afraid. PLEASE FORWARD THIS MESSAGE TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW!!