Too friendly

LegacyUser

Is it possible to be too friendly?
I feel like I'm a really friendly, easy going person but it gets me nowhere with people.
I don't mean I'm all over people like a rash or stuck in their faces all the time.
I'm from a tiny town and most people I know are only people to say hello to or they have established friendships or they know who I am, who the family is etc and don't seem to want to bother getting to know me.
I can be quiet to begin with around some people, especially in the pub, but soon come out of my shell and enjoy having the craic.
People I see around town that get on best with loads of people are, for want of better descriptive terms, a bit sour or gossipy or dry. Is that the way to win people over? I know that people say to just be yourself but what if that isn't working? I'm feeling very lonely.

My name is URL

Just be yourself

If you put on a facade of being ultra-friendly to everyone people will see you as false.

If someone pisses you off, let them know that you're pissed off. If you feel like joing in a gossip, do.

Above all, do what makes you happy and if others don't appreciate it its their problem

LegacyUser

My name is URL wrote: »

Just be yourself

If you put on a facade of being ultra-friendly to everyone people will see you as false.

If someone pisses you off, let them know that you're pissed off. If you feel like joing in a gossip, do.

Above all, do what makes you happy and if others don't appreciate it its their problem

I don't think I conveyed what I meant very well in my original post. I'm not putting on a facade! that's my point, being friendly and smiley is naturally how I am and I'd have to consciously stop and try to not be so friendly, which I've tried and I found it a chore!

I do let people know I am annoyed and I'm not afraid to be pissed off. I'm not walking around like a smiling robot!

I guess I shouldn't let it bother me because the people I'm around don't constitute the whole country!

cafecolour

No, being friendly will generally do you quite well in life. Just don't come off as desperate/needy if that makes sense.

LegacyUser

Unregistered wrote: »

Is it possible to be too friendly?
I feel like I'm a really friendly, easy going person but it gets me nowhere with people.
I don't mean I'm all over people like a rash or stuck in their faces all the time.
I'm from a tiny town and most people I know are only people to say hello to or they have established friendships or they know who I am, who the family is etc and don't seem to want to bother getting to know me.
I can be quiet to begin with around some people, especially in the pub, but soon come out of my shell and enjoy having the craic.
People I see around town that get on best with loads of people are, for want of better descriptive terms, a bit sour or gossipy or dry. Is that the way to win people over? I know that people say to just be yourself but what if that isn't working? I'm feeling very lonely.

The older you get, the more you realise that some people aren't worth getting to know.... no matter how friendly you are, they just don't want to know.

It's not your fault and nothing you can do will change them.

There are better people out there to get to know - you'll find them with your open and friendly persona....

Where I live, I've gotten to know lots of people in the town by getting involved in local events and festivals... but I've found that there are some people who I may have gotten on well with, as in met them a few nights out and chatted to them, who will just blank me the next time they see me.

That used to bother me. I just let it slide now. Usually it happens with younger people.

I think that there is general suspicion of people in Ireland, a "what does this person want from me?" attitude which is a pity.

LegacyUser

beenthere wrote: »

Usually it happens with younger people.QUOTE]
It happens me most with women, no matter what age. Men and older people react well to my friendly open nature. Very annoying