Lending money to friends

LegacyUser

I lent a friend of mine €150 about 2 months ago until his next pay day. He then gets let go from his job and has now signed on the dole. He has yet to pay me back but the thing is he still goes on the piss at the weekends! Meanwhile Im scraping and scrounging and could do with the extra few bob not to mention I bought him a ticket to concert in croker as he asked me to get one for him when I was booking the tickets. Now he cant go cause he "has no money" and Im left with an extra ticket that I have to try and get rid of. So Im effectively down €230 at his behest and yet he's moved home, pays no rent and still gets to go out at the weekends.

What should I say to him?

shellyboo

Well, I think since you were stupid enough to buy a ticket for someone who already owes you €150 quid, you'll have to take that one on the nose.

Have you asked him for it back yet?

Wreck

Unregistered wrote: »

I lent a friend of mine €150 about 2 months ago until his next pay day. He then gets let go from his job and has now signed on the dole. He has yet to pay me back but the thing is he still goes on the piss at the weekends! Meanwhile Im scraping and scrounging and could do with the extra few bob not to mention I bought him a ticket to concert in croker as he asked me to get one for him when I was booking the tickets. Now he cant go cause he "has no money" and Im left with an extra ticket that I have to try and get rid of. So Im effectively down €230 at his behest and yet he's moved home, pays no rent and still gets to go out at the weekends.

What should I say to him?

You should remind him that he still owes you the 150, and that if you can't find someone to buy the ticket he also will owe you for that. Just say it straight out, and let him know things are tight for you also.

LegacyUser

Well first of all what the hell did you buy him the ticket for after he didnt pay you back the first €150?!?!?! Stupid move.

I'd simply hint at how broke you are for a few days, vocally wonder how you could get an extra few bob. Then suddenly turn to him and say 'hey you actually owe me a bit of money ya think you could give it back, maybe €20 a week or somethin??' If he says he cant afford it, simply jokingly say 'sur ya go out every weekend and get mangled, things cant be that bad'.

Dont lend money again unless you know 100 youl get it back!! (Make sure to say I NEED THIS MONEY BACK ASAP)

Munster_Gal

Say it straight out. I've been there. it's suck a pain

renraw

Don't ever lend cash to mates. Because from my experience you never get it back and if they don't have the respect to even attempt to give it back, then they're not friends. They could easily pay you back and like a lot of so called "friends" out there, money is more important to them than friendship. I've been stung a couple of times but never again!

And if you say it to them they're probably come up with some silly excuse and you'll be the one embarrassed for asking for it back in the first place and it won't even cause them to feel in the slightest bit guilty, especially if it goes on for a while. Just do what i do, blank them out and if it gets to them enough as to why you're not your usuall chatty self to them, they're boound to ask if everything is alright

LegacyUser

Unregistered wrote: »

I lent a friend of mine €150 about 2 months ago until his next pay day. He then gets let go from his job and has now signed on the dole.

....so he's signed on less than 2 months ago? My understanding is that Dole claims are taking about 9 weeks to process atm, therefore no money until then, yet he can afford to go out in the meantime. Hmmm.
Did he get redundancy? I presume he's living off his last wages cheque and savings.
When his claim comes through, he'll get all the backmoney together, too.

Now is really the time to ask for that money back - before he's p*ssed it all away down the pub.

Sugar Drunk

Have learned by experience never lend money to friends. Bit late now for that for you I know.

Id say be straight with him. Tell him you were glad you coulc help him out but you are now stuck for money so you need the money back asap and that he will have to either pay for or sell the ticket. If he argues he hasnt the money suggest he pay in installments and that he uses some drink money to pay you instead.

If he kicks off or is not willing to do this then was he ever a good friend at all?

I lent a good friend a good bit of money years ago which he refused to pay back (similar situation unemployed but could afford drink etc). In the end I lost the money but got well rid of someone who I found out was never a friend at all

BaZmO*

Unregistered wrote: »

I'd simply hint at how broke you are for a few days, vocally wonder how you could get an extra few bob. Then suddenly turn to him and say 'hey you actually owe me a bit of money ya think you could give it back, maybe €20 a week or somethin??' If he says he cant afford it, simply jokingly say 'sur ya go out every weekend and get mangled, things cant be that bad'.

Hinting and joking is DEFINITELY not the way to go.
His friend knows he owes the money and if he just hints and jokes about it his friend will either purposely not take the hint or use the joking element as excuse that he doesn't really need or want the money back.


There's an old saying, "Before you lend money to a friend decide which you value the most"

Xiney

Please note that what's done is done and berating him for that is not constructive.

Barracudaincork

Why the stupid comments, he didnt say he bought the ticket after loaning the money, he could of bought them 5 months ago?? Not nice or helpful IMO!

OP, i think you are just going to have to tell him that you hadnt forgotten about the money you lent him and that you will require that back, give him the choice of paying lump sum or €50 a week for the next month etc

Dont be all shy and oh i cant ask him about it, if you aare like that, he will just walk all over you, as he knows you wont stick up for yourself.

JonathanAnon

I would tell him that you bought the tickets on credit card, you need to pay off the bill, and you need the 150 he owes you. He came to you with a sob story and you gave him the money, so if you go to him with the same and he DOESNT give you the money then you know exactly what type of friend he is.

I have a user/friend who does the same thing. Only for he my old mate(who is now in the states)'s brother I would not even speak to him.

Eric Cartman

im still in a situation like yours, it really sucks, if it gets out of hand i would suggest district court, im considering that at the moment, but the amount im owed is far greater than 150 euro

chuci

straight out ask him for the 150 back, if he tells you he has no money how can he go out on the raz every weekend? never lend friends money it all just gets way too complicated. As for the ticket have you tried to return it from where you bought it?they might refund you if the gig is sold out.

SLUSK

Unregistered wrote: »

I lent a friend of mine €150 about 2 months ago until his next pay day. He then gets let go from his job and has now signed on the dole. He has yet to pay me back but the thing is he still goes on the piss at the weekends! Meanwhile Im scraping and scrounging and could do with the extra few bob not to mention I bought him a ticket to concert in croker as he asked me to get one for him when I was booking the tickets. Now he cant go cause he "has no money" and Im left with an extra ticket that I have to try and get rid of. So Im effectively down €230 at his behest and yet he's moved home, pays no rent and still gets to go out at the weekends.

What should I say to him?

I don't lend money to people

chocgirl

There's nothing wrong with helping a friend out but you need the money back so ask for it. I'd just say any chance of that money you owe me, I need it as soon as possible. No need to make a big deal out of it.

aoibhebree

Sit down with him, give him the ticket - it's up to him to get rid of it - and make sure he's aware that he owes you money and the exact amount. Ask him to set up a standing order of, say 10-20euro per week, into your account.

Yes, you'll both probably be embarrassed about the whole thing, and things might get awkward between ye for a while, but just remember it's his fault - not yours, and you're only asking for your own money back.