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Low Self esteem

  • 13-06-2009 10:20pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    There's really two issues I'd maybe like a bit of advice on..

    The first thing is I kinda have pretty low self esteem at the moment. Sometimes I appear to be all confident but the only time I think I look half ok is when I've spent ages getting ready, and then I just think I end up looking like a slapper or something. I'm not naturally pretty at all. I'm not really great at choosing clothes either. Everything always looks kind of plain. I'm extremely paranoid about ym friends, and I always think people have alterior motives. Basically I want that to change. I always seem tense and people always joke telling me I need to chill. ANd then sometimes im so relaxed. It's like im a split person.


    The second thing is.. there's this boy I've been good friends with for ages, but I have really strong feelings for him, and trust me, it's not going anyway. So I need to get over him. If I complete get rid of him from my life it'll be mean to him, but then it's not like he'd be devestated. But i want to sort this out for myself. I always feel constantly not good enough


Comments

  • #2
    Kevster
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,980 ✭✭✭Kevster


    Hi,

    It seems like you are ready to make big changes in your life, and that's a good sign. It shows that you are becoming more independent than you already were. For example, you can apply this to your male friend: You can very well be the nice girl and ensure that he isn't hurt, or you can focus on your own needs/wants and work your life away from him. Friendships don't last forever. They can, but they don't in many cases. Now is the time that you must focus on your own life my dear.

    On the other issue, I can assure you that there is no one ideal figure/look that all girls should aspire too. Guys are not robots - We like diversity and different guys like different looks. Not all guys like skinny grls with make-up and straightened hair, for example. My ideal girl dresses down all the time, doesn't wear make-up, has a bit of weight on her, and has messy long hair. So, what I'm saying is: Don't aspire to look like something that you think other people like. Instead - and again back to the 'independence' thing - focus on what YOU like yourself and feel most comfortable with.

    Take care always and forever,
    Kevin


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