Advice on depression

LegacyUser

Hi everyone. Been on here a long time, but never posted a thread. But could really do with some advice/opinions. I'm turning 29 tomorrow & feel kinda lost (i know im not the only one to feel that by the way!).

I was let go from my job in March & have had no luck so far. It was a job I was lucky enough to actually enjoy & would often put in 50-60hr wks. I suffered from really bad depression for close to 10yrs but somehow pulled through to get my degree & find a job. But now i feel totally lost, i mean totally! Mon-Fri is a struggle. My friends are all too busy with work/girlfriends etc. to meet up.

Anyone who has had depression how difficult it is to live with. For me, the job kept it at bay i geuss, gave me a purpose, something to focus on. I've been single for about 8 years & my friends didn't know about my depression so I never had anyone to talk to.

I really don't want to go back to the way I was as I feel I was a good 3 years of my life due to it. But how do I keep the negative thoughts at bay. Has anyone been in a similar position?

Agent J

You are not alone.

www.aware.ie might be a good place to start for research and information.
They also list various support groups all over the country.

If you have too much time on your hands i suggest you make a regular weekly one because more than anything it will help give your week struture.

Yeah, i suffer from it. Suffer feels like the wrong word to be honest.
I tend to just keep myself so busy that i dont tend to have enough time to think. That is ok for a short term stop gap measure but long term its all a question of balance for me personally.

If you arent working then you possible should find something to fill your time with. Have you considered doing some sort of volunteer work?

http://www.volunteer.ie/
Their database systems sucks but there is stuff in there.

I guess my point is to fill your time with places to be and things to do. Set yourself some realistic goals and go easy if you dont make them. Go for a walk/cycle/ run something once a day if you have nothing else to be doing. Something that makes you break a sweat. Adreline in my experience is a great counter to depressive feelings.

Thing is.. .. if you are anything like me then any above can be the very last thing you feel like doing. This is where the make or break part comes in. You have to force your self to do things. Start small. One task/item a day or every 2/3 days and then build up.

I can understand not wanting to tell your friends but truth of the matter is if they are your friends they would probably want to help if they can. The only issue is you need to be able to tell them what you think they can do to help.
How would you feel if one of your friends was in your situation but didnt tell you becase they "didnt want to be a burden"? Personally id be annoyed.

SUmmary.

1)Some sort of exercise
2)Get involved in something which is regular and gets you out of the house.
3)No shame whatsoever in talking to people.

Good luck.

clairemcbear

The best thing you can do is keep yourself busy. I understand your friends don't have time for you mon-fri but maybe if there was even one of them you feel you could confide in it would help a lot. He would understand and make more of an effort,don't feel like a burden. Have you got any hobbies? If you don't it might be a good idea to think about what your interested in,something to focus on,see your free time as a chance to focus on the things you really love doing. Exercise is critical too,an hours walk a day really helps especially if you are on medication. I don't know if your situation suits but a dog might be a good addition to your life,it's companionship,it's hard work and takes time and it's very rewarding. It's also an excuse to go for that long walk
I hope this helps a little,good luck.

petes

Have you seen anyone for the depression. +1 for what Agent J said. I have just started to take anti depressants. On them about a week now and can feel the difference. Had some pretty negative thoughts. I cut out the beer and seem to be doing fine.

Excercise is a great tool. Also eat properly and you will start to feel better.

Have you got at least one really close friend to talk to. This is really important as I have found out.

Tchaikovsky

As said above, keeping yourself occupied and plenty of exercise is crucial. Also, if you're a drinker, try to cut down a bit and keep an eye on your diet- plenty of water, fish, veg, fruit and less sugary food.
Best of luck OP

LegacyUser

Thanks for the advice. I have been to see people in the past for depression & have been on anti-d's as well, but not for about 2 years now. I used to self harm & really don't want to go back there again. As for my friends, as i said they have their own lives to lead. would usually meet them at the wkend, but always in a group, might be with there girlfriend etc. Im trying the excercise route, but tend to spend my time thinking about the job situation.

Thanks for taking the time to post.

nicegirl

I know exactly how you feel. I have had depression for 10 years, and it really is a horrible illness. My advice would be to help yourself. I have seen a councellor in the past, and the support from friends and family means alot as well. Im sure your friends would be supportive if you let them know.

Also, I would highly recommend Effexor XL tablets. There are different dosages depending on how depressed a person is. I am on 150mg a day, and I am happy and content all the time. They really are brilliant tablets for depression.

I hope this can help you in some way