Don't want to watch him go

LegacyUser

Hi all. I just need a bit of advice. I'm in my thirties and I've been going out with the most wonderful man since the end of February. He has been straight with me from the start and told me that an Australian visa he applied for nearly two years ago is finally being processed.
It will be mid summer by the time he gets confirmation of success in his application, and success is looking very likely.

I don't know what to do. I don't really want to meet him anymore because it hurts more each time knowing that he'll probably be gone by summer's end. I don't want to break up with him, but I don't think I have a choice.

Any thoughts? Or has anyone else had to go through similar?

Thank you

LegacyUser

I have been through the exact same thing as you, time line etc all the same. I was fine with the idea at first, then we both had a major event in our lifes that brought us closer. As a result of that i knew i couldnt continue on seeing him till he left, i felt i was going backwards and him leaving would be too hard. If we hadnt of gotten so close i would more than likely still have been fine with it.

If it was me and i had my time again, i wouldnt change a thing, i still miss him and think of him and havent moved onto someone new, but not continuing the relationship was the best thing. It gets too hard closer the time.

I also did the same as this in reverse i lived on the other side of the world and left a man there, i keeping seeing him till the moment my plane was due to leave, it was very very hard in the end and yet again i wouldnt do it again.

Apply for one yourself and go with him.
Whats stopping you?
Lifes too short.
Take on the adventure.
You'll be glad you did.

LegacyUser

Thank you for your replies. It's good to have another's input, I'm afraid to talk to my friends about it in case it all gets blown out of proportion!

moco

I don't know what to advise you. I'm in a similar position myself, same timescale and everything, although he's said he doesn't want to go but may have to for work. I don't think I can go on not knowing what's going to happen so am considering finishing it now to save pain in the long run but I really don't want to.

Wurly

unregistered wrote: »

Hi all. I just need a bit of advice. I'm in my thirties and I've been going out with the most wonderful man since the end of February. He has been straight with me from the start and told me that an Australian visa he applied for nearly two years ago is finally being processed.
It will be mid summer by the time he gets confirmation of success in his application, and success is looking very likely.

I don't know what to do. I don't really want to meet him anymore because it hurts more each time knowing that he'll probably be gone by summer's end. I don't want to break up with him, but I don't think I have a choice.

Any thoughts? Or has anyone else had to go through similar?

Thank you

Have you spoken to him about your feelings on this? It's very hard to make a decision without the vital info of knowing how he feels about things.

Have a chat to him. Keep it light, just in case.. Then see how you feel.

LegacyUser

Trí wrote: »

Have you spoken to him about your feelings on this? It's very hard to make a decision without the vital info of knowing how he feels about things.

Have a chat to him. Keep it light, just in case.. Then see how you feel.

Yeah, I spoke to him about it. He said that we should just see how things go. I agree with him on one level because nobody knows what can happen down the line.
Aach, some days I enjoy what we have (I'm in that mood now actually ), and other days (like yesterday), the dread creeps in.
What is it they say? 'Live life like there's no tomorrow, and make plans like you're going to live forever'. Sounds great, but it sucks when you're oscillating between the two extremes.